Oi, a dispute....

Sweet_KJ

Sweet_KJ

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This is also a small (or not) vent, and I was wondering if anyone got advice, too....

Wow, apparently my ex-fiance still very hostile and angry with me. Perhaps now he has a new girl in his life (I just found out, as I will explain...) We broke up over a year ago because he was a maliputive, lying bastard who knew all along he was cheating on me (he kept denying, denying, denying like Clinton did until they found the blue dress with his sperm on it).

Anyway I have obviously moved on, and tried to maintain a distant but friendly friendship (not really that, but anyhow..) with him via text message (which are seldom sent by the way). Very recently I decided it was time to discuss the possibility of getting my furniture back (which was moved with him to North Dakota under false pretense that "everything was harmomous in our lives"). He had promised to bring them back to California when he was visiting his son, about a year ago. That never happened (he did visit, but not bring the property). So, I politely text messaged him and asked if we could discuss the possibility of it being shipped. I really need the stuff back because the chair was my grandfather's -- it got semimental value to me.

Well I haven't heard back from him in two days, which was unusual. So I sent him another text message simply saying "Hi, I was wondering if you have received my previously sent txt msg?" Later he responded, "I don't know what you're talking about. I'm not the only 1 who uses this phone. U hardly answer the same week. Better yet, I'll remove you as to avoid future hassle" Yoow...

So I respond back, "I didn't know that, what do you mean you're not the only one? I was just trying to ask you if you got my last message, which was obviously a "no" I was just trying to ask if we could discuss about getting my furniture back"

He goes "I leave my phone at home when i go to work and apparently she's been reading my msgs so i might not get them all"

I go "Oh a new gf? Cool."

And then he responds "I really don't have time for drama anymore (me thinking: Uuh, like you think I do?) sorry gotta go don't have unlimited text anymore"

And I ended "Ok, I'll call you another time to discuss the situation of getting my property back."

Yoooww.... it doesn't bother me one bit that he has a new girl in his life (in fact I'm happy he's done w/ me) but it bothers me he's being very hostile, and I suspect that he plans to block me from contacting him because he's worried that the truth about him would come out. I wouldn't do anything so disruptive like that, but I am tempted to call him and politely talk about getting my stuff back. I would pay for part of the shipment. But then I discussed it with my mom... Wow...

She really dislikes this guy (I don't blame her)... and she recommends that he pays for 100% of the shipping because he took the furniture with him under those false pretense, and refused to help me move out from school and back to home (I did a lot of work for his own move, btw). I was supposed to move to North Dakota as soon as I was done with my surgery and rehabilitation in California. Of course, that didn't work out because I was better suited without him. So he still has my stuff from over a year ago, and did make promises to return them, which didn't happen. Also if he can't do the delivery of it, I may ask him to pay me $1,000 to replace those items. I really don't have any furniture of my own because he has them. And I hope to get them back before my pending move elsewhere (out of my parents' house).

So any idea? I was thinking of checking out to file a civil suit against him, but I'm not sure how that works with me being in California and him in North Dakota. Any ideas?
 
Well, you can research about the laws in CA and ND and see what they have about suing. 2nd of all, do you have all the evidence that could be enough to bring for the judge to see that he has all of your stuff like for example: An agreement with your ex-fiancee's and your signtures, proof of your stuffs in the pictures from the place, etc. And ask your mom or you know how much those items costs. I hope u saved all of the messages that u just wrote it here so show it to the judge of what he said. Keep contacting him until you guys discuss this matter and if he continues to refuse.. tell him you r suing him for those items!!! You have a right to get those items that are yours and he thinks your items are his and that was free for him.. well he's WRONG!!!! Let me know how it goes!!! :)
 
Ouch...it sucks when such an issue comes up like this one. I certainly do hope you'd be able to get your furnitures returned as they're rightfully yours.
Like what WildKatress said -- do a bit of research on the laws of both CA and ND and go from there. Call up both city halls and find out what you can do in the process of creating a civil suit against your ex.

Hope you get the furnitures back soonish. :fingersx:
 
What about Small Claims Court--I believe the ceiling amount in CA is now $4K. Best to you........
 
Tousi said:
What about Small Claims Court--I believe the ceiling amount in CA is now $4K. Best to you........
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Oh, yah...forgot about the Small Claims court -- you can look into that one as well.
 
Yeah, you can sue him in a small claims court to get your things back or have proof that you own those things that he has....

I've done it before and my case went quickly that day as I thought....It was a piece of cake! heh....

It doesn't matter if he lives out of the state of Ca, once you file a small claim on him , he would have to show up to court in your hometown where ever you take his butt to court, if no show up then he will be order to return your things within whatever days the judge order him to....

Good Luck! :thumb:
 
If you have documentation that shows that those furniture are yours such as documentation of purchase, then it's possible. The best place to go would probably be a civil court in the state where you resided with those furniture. If you don't have documentation, then you're gonna have a hard time making a case. :dunno:
 
I meant small claims, not civil suit.

First I'm going to try to get him to talk to me. He was fine a few weeks ago, now he's isn't, most likely because he got a new girl in his home/possession.

I tried calling him, and he picked up the phone and responded it was him -- I said "Good evening, [his name], this is [my name], I was wondering if you have time to discuss shipping my furniture back." He promptly hung up on me. I printed out the conversation (or lack thereof) of course.

So I'm going to keep trying to call him, but not too much, or write him a letter (and have a copy of it of my own). Requesting that he take full expenses of shipping my furniture back, or pay this/that amount for the time he had them in his possession/used for free to replace it. And then I won't bother him anymore after that. Unfortuately there is sentimental value in my grandfather's chair. I don't know how to document that, except to have my grandma come to court, and my dad come to court (he bought me the dresser). But really the last thing I want to do is take it to court. He won't show up, I know that for sure since it's like 2000 miles apart. And I am aware that even through the judge may order him to return or pay it within such and such days, it's not fully guaranteed. He is a fighter. I've seen it, and he is a nasty person. I'm very calm.
 
KJ, hi......Ummmm, normally, Vampy's right re proof, documentation; however, the burden of proof is lessened or not as strict in Small Claims Court. Present your evidence as best as you can and hope the judge sees it your way.....Small Claims is a pretty informal atmosphere. I've never experienced it but I remember some things from my days at law school. so.....hope things swing your way....
 
Ok here's how i'm going to do it... I'll write a typed letter and sign it asking for my furniture back.

Send it in registered mail (he'll have to sign it, and I will know whether he has received it or not). If he doesn't respond, then I will take it to Small Claims.

I wonder what's the procedure is for him to show up.... I have a feeling he may either send a lawyer (which would be stupid as he can not really afford that) or his mother since he's not in California.
 
Go Judge Judy! ;)

That reminds me about that suit in California involving 3 Deaf guys against some old lady and her daughter. I think the 3 were white, black and Hawaiian.

:-X

Anyways, I hope it all works out best in your favor, Sweet_KJ! I know some guys can be jerks at times.
 
KJ, I don't think lawyers are allowed in Small Claims Court but I could be mistaken.
 
BabyPhat21 said:
SMALL CLAIMS!! take his ass to court.........
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Yeah... you've given that jerk a lot of leeway, KJ.... you've been very civil... still he has walked all over you, wallowing in his own mud- time to take action, babe.
 
Tousi said:
KJ, I don't think lawyers are allowed in Small Claims Court but I could be mistaken.
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No Tousi, you're right, small claims court will not allow any lawyer in there, you go yourself and put your case together yourself...its the same thing as Judge Judy show and others as well....

I agree with Deaf258, go on Judge Judy, she one smart judge!
 
I second that w/Deaf258.

Which the best interest for you, GO FOR IT.. reason why you had been quite fusterate reach him and prompty answer and why more.. he kept avoiding you these all answers.

Isn't worth.. Oh yes, best signature come w/the service of ups unless to see if he recives the letter or not.. No matter what, go ahead prepare for your action the court claim or small civil wha..ever you like to. Whichever you had to pay for processing paperwork at the court claim or small civic.

I think best for you try contact Judge Judy, Would be great benefical because it's MEDIA. your ex-bf would flip his mind off and doesn't want be part of media.. he may return your items back. *who knows*

worth my 2 cents!

Good Luck!
 
LOL..... I don't think I want to go to Judge Judy. I don't like the idea of going on National TV. But I will write to his Commanding Officer (he's in the Air Force) for assistance. I'm starting the first letter to the ex with a simple (but in not the same way ;) ): "Yo, I want my s#&^ back, regards, Me" plus I added "I reserve my rights to take further action as necessary if you don't timely respond"

And then I'll send 1 or 2 more letters and if he continues to return those letters or ignore them or threaten them, then I will write to the Commanding Officer pleading my case (No one wants a unbecoming conduct officer -- yes my ex is an officer)

And then I will take it to Small Claims court.. I imagine it will be a 2 month process...

Mom read my first letter to him (the simple one), and she suggested that I add the reasons why I never moved there to him (because he did a "dealbreaker") and if he can't return my furniture then I want a sentimental value of $_____. I explained to her, I don't want to do that in the letters right now because what if I do have to take him to Small Claims court, I may not get what I'm seeking cuz I was asking for money if he couldn't return it in the condition it was in before the move (the movers actually damaged them...)
 
Small Claim court is only answer for this situtation.
 
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In California, lawyers aren't allowed inside the small claims court. You can discuss with a lawyer before or after the case. I am not asking for a lawyer, of course, because I'm aware of what goes on in Small Court (I'm a big fan of "People's Court" btw).

Right now I'm not taking him to court. I just want to open a communication line between him and I. He's really selfish when he gets a new person in his life (I know because when he did the "dealbreaker" he brought out his a$$hole-ness and said some very harsh things to me), and the same thing is happening now even through we do not have any sort of relationship (thank goodness!)
 
Going to 'Judge Judy' or 'People's Court' might bring out the 'sucker' in him to light!! You may gain a better advantage of taking this to one of these courts than a small claims court...it depends on how much evidence and proof you have such as pictures, receipts/transactions of such purchases, and for the items that were given to you by another family member, they would do well to show up in court with you....

Whatever you decide to do...and no need to blush and be nervous if you did go along with the idea of going on a national T.V. Court show cuz you have EVERY right to get your personal belongings back! Best wishes and hope you'll succeed! :thumb:
 
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