Not happy about ring...

dereksbicycles

dereksbicycles

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I saw this posted online and I thought this was ridiculous. I'm very curious about what you would do if you got a ring that you did not like.

Any ideas for Melanie?
"Jeff and I have been together for two years and I’ve been waiting for him to propose. He finally did and everything was perfect … except the ring. The ring is so ugly that I can’t stand the thought of having to look at it every day of my life. But I love Jeff and I don’t want to hurt his feelings. Do you have any advice whatsoever on asking about changing to a different ring or do I just have to suck it up and wear this one?" ~Melanie
 
Usually the girl is consulted. If he bought it without her and she hates it, she should exchange it.
 
Even if he wnated to surpise her. Maybe ask her something ideas of what she might have liked?
 
Frisky Feline said:
Tell the truth. lol
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In a tactful way, of course. :giggle:

She could also use the suggestion that they go look at his-and-her sets together as part of the exchange.

Let's just hope the ring wasn't a family heirloom!
 
LOL Definitely the truth. But she will have to back it up with legitimate reasons or she will appear ungrateful (OK, maybe let a little harmless clever deception slide? :D ).
 
Be honest but say something other than it's "ugly." What exactly is not appealing about the ring? Is it yellow gold but white gold is more flattering to her skin tone? Is the setting ornate but her lifestyle is sporty and casual? Is it too dainty for her large hand? Is it too bulky for her dainty hand? Does the style conflict with the groom's ring style? Does the style remind her of a ring that is worn by a rival or someone for whom it has bad memories?

There are many legitimate ways to describe the ring without just saying "ugly."
 
Actually she could have discussed with her spouse about what she likes the ring and let him what she likes. BUT its too late for her so she needs to tell him the truth. I dont care what her words would be, i dunno if she is going to use "ugly" to him. Actually its too late i m sure her spouse knew due to the facebook that he can read or whatever.
 
Frisky Feline said:
Actually she could have discussed with her spouse about what she likes the ring and let him what she likes. BUT its too late for her so she needs to tell him the truth. I dont care what her words would be, i dunno if she is going to use "ugly" to him. Actually its too late i m sure her spouse knew due to the facebook that he can read or whatever.
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Good point about the FB posting. Apparently she's not very sensitive about his feelings.

He doesn't know her taste in rings, and she doesn't care about insulting him in public. Hmmm . . . there may be more trouble here than just a ring style.
 
I don't know if those were real name used or not. Either way, I am sure the guy figured this one out. He probably feels insulted. I wonder if they're still together. My guess is probably no. If it was the guy, I would probably end it.
 
I wouldn't want my gf or wife buying me a motorcycle. Unless she was my bike buddy for years. My point is I don't know anything abt rings except the bigger the diamond (and size and shape and color) the more expensive .. im not a ring guy so I would rather surprise her by bringing her there and putting down the $15,000. She will know 1000% more than me and be happy with it for as long as possible.
So she should just tell him now or its gonna get ugly later. That's my opinion but everybody should do what they do best.
If he can't take it he needs a less classy girl to be with.
 
SilentRider said:
I wouldn't want my gf or wife buying me a motorcycle. Unless she was my bike buddy for years. My point is I don't know anything abt rings except the bigger the diamond (and size and shape and color) the more expensive .. im not a ring guy so I would rather surprise her by bringing her there and putting down the $15,000. She will know 1000% more than me and be happy with it for as long as possible.
So she should just tell him now or its gonna get ugly later. That's my opinion but everybody should do what they do best.
If he can't take it he needs a less classy girl to be with.
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I want the 15,000 and ill just get a ring from the vending machine.
 
SilentRider said:
I wouldn't want my gf or wife buying me a motorcycle. Unless she was my bike buddy for years. My point is I don't know anything abt rings except the bigger the diamond (and size and shape and color) the more expensive .. im not a ring guy so I would rather surprise her by bringing her there and putting down the $15,000. She will know 1000% more than me and be happy with it for as long as possible.
So she should just tell him now or its gonna get ugly later. That's my opinion but everybody should do what they do best.
If he can't take it he needs a less classy girl to be with.
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I want the 15,000 and ill just get a ring from the vending machine.
 
Of course each person is different. If u already own a home and transportation. Its easier to get other stuff. I think 15k is cheaper than buying her a new BMW.
 
I'd be honest and say it was hideous. If I don't say something early on... I know how my mouth works, and it will spit out the truth eventually and it will be hurtful rather than if I had just said it was ugly in the first place. :D She said yes and that's all that should matter.
 
Im happy this didn't happen to me. But I am sure I mention to my finace like 20 billion times that i like sapphire more than diamond.
 
Reba said:
In a tactful way, of course. :giggle:

She could also use the suggestion that they go look at his-and-her sets together as part of the exchange.

Let's just hope the ring wasn't a family heirloom!
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Two of my clients (2 gay men) melted down their feminine heirloom rings into 2 bands to marry each other... There's ways around the heirloom issue.

Some people also only wear the wedding band, which you choose together. If the guy picked out an ugly ring there are ways round it... A wedding ring isn't a fashion statement as much as it's symbolic.

And there's always "losing it" lol
 
ohmylight said:
Two of my clients (2 gay men) melted down their feminine heirloom rings into 2 bands to marry each other... There's ways around the heirloom issue.
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Yes, some people have the stones reset into more contemporary styles. It depends on the individuals involved, how sentimental they may be.

Some people also only wear the wedding band, which you choose together.
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Sometimes. Many of the rings are sold as matched sets, and the wedding band and engagement ring fit together. So, if the guy bought a fitted set, that probably wouldn't work.

Myself, I wear only a band because that's all I have. Hubby and I have matching wedding bands, no engagement ring.

If the guy picked out an ugly ring there are ways round it... A wedding ring isn't a fashion statement as much as it's symbolic.
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Right. I wonder about their relationship because she used the word ugly, like she hated it. She didn't describe it other than "ugly." Also, she made such a public complaint about it. I suspect there are other problems beyond the ring issue.

And there's always "losing it" lol
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Gasp! That would be too expensive!
 
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