Need advice on what I should do...

O

o0obluemoon0o0

Member
Joined
Jun 3, 2004
Messages
152
Reaction score
0
Umm, I dont know which category to put this in relationship or sex section. since this is a little bit of both... I have been single for 2 years and 1-2 weeks now, and celibate for abt... 1 yrs 7 months or so. By choice, tho.. I didnt wanted to date or get involved physically or emotionally with a guy. too much drama and all that crap. recently I just start dating a guy for first time in nearly 2 years. expect timing seem always wrong for us, due to our schedule, and the fact IM going to be super busy in August until probably next year, due to college, events, and job.. and He's going away to job corp in Washington. so I decided to call it off. I didnt feel like I should keep going with this, since timing isnt right for us, and we dont really have much of time for each other. yet we keep coming back to this, dancing around each other.. We still likes each other. some of the days I just want to jump on his bone, some I don't, cuz I keep talking myself out of it. He wants to have sex w/ me too. but he doesnt seem to talk himself out of it. He seem too innocent, naive. and he just lost his virgin last summer in August. only been with one girl. I kind of have hard time bringing myself to go somewhere with him for the night or renting a hottub for cpl hour, to... do the deeds. u know? Maybe it's just me? cuz I'm too nervous to be with a guy? since I havent been with any1 in long time? what should I do?
 
i have been to similar shoes as you had been into..

i have been single for more than 2 years.. finally i'm dating a gal.. its kinda about time and its hard to get into relationship thingy again.
but for me.. i think its time for me to go on and get into relationship.
however.. sometimes i feel i'm still not ready.. but i just go on.. do it

but since u 're going to college.. having college classes, homework, and long distance relationship will be tough. cuz u probally will barly have time to visit or etc..
 
Well, if you don't feel comfortable... back off. Don't move on just because it will make him happy. It's not about making him happy or making you happy. It's about making both of you happy. If you are not ready for a committed relationship, then both of you should know where the line is and understand that no matter what you both do, it shouldn't get to the point where you both want to become committed. If you both wanted to have sex, then both of you should understand that this is just "sex" and nothing more.
 
sex is going to make things miserable in my experience....if ur not in commited relationship, I would suggest to stay away and continue with ur college and stuff that won't distract u from ur life til u have time for a serious relationship. That's my opinion, ya don't have to get the word from me. :)
 
Well, in my own experience...it's the best thing to FOCUS on your own life, because you have a motivation waitin' for ya to achieve and success in YOUR OWN NAME. It's why everyone has their own name as to be somebody for what/who they are. For example: We all have the doctors, lawyers, fishermen, firemen, policemen...etc., etc. and, they makes themselves to come first, because of it. They knew that they have a plenty of time for "serious relationship" (commitment) later, because it will make 2 and 2 persons happy when both of them have sumfin' to success in their lives with their careers and THAT helps each other what they both really wants for their own future. They both could build it thru their skills, experiences, trainin', and all that from college or it could be from job or anything. Let's give each other a room and give a room some breathin' until both of you establish your own foundation. Commitment relationship needs foundation thru college skills, experiences thru jobs and all that, because it costs both of your happiness.

As its for me, there's one deaf man that I like so much and we've known each other for 3 years. We've met in person back in 2002 and he is goin' to come down to see me again this month.... from there, we will discuss what we both really want for our future, because we saw our "foundation" is about to establish since I had my own job and him... has his own business ( I can not say it here what it really is since I promised myself that it is confidential. He is pretty much low key. ) So, we both do not want our "commitment relatioship" to get strain, if we don't have a foundation for it by buildin' sumfin' to meet our happiness.

I hope that helps! :thumb:
 
just feel like throwing this random quote in here. hope it make sense to you all

Love is swift, sincere, pious, joyful, generous, strong, patient, faithful, prudent, long-suffering, courageous, and never seeking its own; for wheresoever a person seeketh his own, there he falleth from love.


~ Thomas ã Kempis ~
 
Like ^Angel^ said, you do need to follow your heart. It's not worth it to do something if it's done for the sake of making someone other than yourself happy, especially when it's something as serious as sex. Yes, there are selfless things that you should do for someone else, but sex isn't one of them. That's something that should only be done when both parties are comfortable...it doesn't look like you are, though...not completely...so just take it slow and do what your heart tells ya to. :)

Easier for both of you that way. Good luck!
 
Yeah, thanks you all. I've decided Im not gonna keep on dating him.. Doesnt feel right to me... Beside I want to focus on myself. and still meet some guys as friends, if one of these guy and I clicked, we might date. definetly nothign serious for awhile. Because I got to start doing things for myself, than for my family or friends, or boyfriends.. need to start my life... live my life the way I intended to do. :)

~Kiz
 
Back
Top