My Song | Story of a girl stuck between the hearing and Deaf worlds

Both ears been skin grafted with skin taken from tummy now as there is nothing to see completely EMPTY, no senso's ,no ear drums, no cochlea's Nothing, Consultant has typed on Monitor even new hair cell growth wont be of any use to me.

Why did I have Cochlear Implants removed, because I had Abscess on the brain TWICE over a few years, nearly lost my life, brain rejected Implants, where electrodes went damaged parts of brain rejected.

You see Im not young, I need to do something and cant i cant get out of house now, fear of leaving going outside, I try but cant...no communication, cant talk to people...dizziness,Tinnitus bilateral 24/7 non stop..and the person who mentioned about spasms in face is because I was born paralysis on 1 side of face, they feel its coming back again :-( at Hospital...

Deaf clubs closing nearly everywhere...I look for clubs but its getting out of house Consultant who came to my house gave it a name..I cant remember..now memory after checks dementia is at early stage? whats next life can throw at me, I will still try and fight, because I Dont give in, might have a moan that helps... well been away long time been in hospital 4 times and this year isnt finished yet...but you know what.

IM STILL BREATHING.
 
stueyyy said:
Deaf clubs closing nearly everywhere...I look for clubs but its getting out of house Consultant who came to my house gave it a name..I cant remember..now memory after checks dementia is at early stage?.
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Agoraphobia
 
Thanks for sharing this. My heart broke for her when the host of the club criticized her so strongly and publicly :-(. I feel very fortunate that, in my early experiences with the deaf community, I did not meet anyone who criticized my signing nor blew me off because of my poor ASL - that would have shattered my confidence and my goals. To-date, even though my ASL still lacks fluency, I have only met one deafie who has shown me impatience and anger with my communication - everyone else has been polite, kind and encouraging. Whether a hearie in a deaf world or a deafie in a hearing world, it's amazing how even one act of kindness, one hand reaching out, can make such a difference.
 
Wirelessly posted

The club host showed such an elitist attitude! It makes me so sad to see him berate Ellen. Yes she had areas needing improvement, but offer suggestion and support, not deafer-than-thou put downs. Attitudes like his will only serve to hurt signed languages and Deaf culture.
 
When I saw this I wanted to:
1. Slap the little brother silly - and wondered why mum didn't step in.
2. Find out why mum won't tell her boyfriend to speak clearly and stop covering his mouth?
3. Cry. And I am not one to cry easily at movies! But rejection and abandonment always hit the right trigger for me - it's too close to home.
 
I was raised by a hearing family to speak English. My mum disapproved of ASL.
I'm glad there's nothing else physically wrong with me, like my bio brother who inherited the family curse of dyslexia. (I still hold out hope that based on my not getting dyslexia, my future kids won't.)
 
Wow, that touched me. I can see a lot of myself in her. Made me think - if someone wants to be friends with me then they need to be friends with who I am. Makes me wonder if I should quit trying to be a part of the messed up hearing world that doesn't understand - but yet I still have some hearing left so I feel like I'm not quite accepted by the Deaf and that's understandable.

No one understands what I'm going through here in real life. They just kind of brush it off or force their messed up hearing agenda over onto me and turn me into some freak circus spectacle.

I just wish I had one person to accept me for me, not some fully hearing version of me.
 
Dixie said:
I just wish I had one person to accept me for me, not some fully hearing version of me.
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I will! I know that doesn't help much online...

I have a hard time relating to anyone who lived a "charmed" life. I fit in with those who have had a few knocks along the way, like me. :wave:
 
Just watched the movie...

Jesus Christ! It's been a PITA getting a passing grade in the hearing world, and clearly it's going to be a PITA getting into the Deaf one - why else would this movie have been made if it didn't truthfully portray the reality for us in-between'ers?
 
AJ, I want to personally thank you for sharing this video with us. I probably would have never come across it otherwise. I can clearly see how it won multiple awards (Best Actress/Best Short Film). The story is just so touching and it's something we can all relate to; deaf, HOH, and even hearing. We all want to feel like we belong somewhere, and Ellen found where she felt accepted. I will definitely be sharing this with my friends. Thanks again.
 
Great video. Does it make me understand the deaf world and HOH world better? Yes, I think so.

Just a thought. If someone could find links to other threads, I would be grateful.

I am HOH since birth and my hearing has not worsened as far as my audiograms can tell. It is not clear from the video if she was born with it or developed it. A worsening condition (going hearing -> deaf, hearing -> HOH or HOH -> deaf) is something that I am wondering about. What emotions do people experience? What do they do to manage their situation?
 
HH scientist said:
Great video. Does it make me understand the deaf world and HOH world better? Yes, I think so.

Just a thought. If someone could find links to other threads, I would be grateful.

I am HOH since birth and my hearing has not worsened as far as my audiograms can tell. It is not clear from the video if she was born with it or developed it. A worsening condition (going hearing -> deaf, hearing -> HOH or HOH -> deaf) is something that I am wondering about. What emotions do people experience? What do they do to manage their situation?
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Hi there HH scientist :wave:

Below is a link to a good thread on AD to read of people who lose their hearing, either gradually or suddenly. It's been going for a long time and is very long. It's a "stickie" in the Our World, Our Culture forum.
http://www.alldeaf.com/our-world-our-culture/62953-adjustment-late-onset-deafness.html

I was born HOH and raised orally through mainstream education. I thought my HL (hearing loss) was stable in the severe-profound range, but in recent years there has been a continual slight decline. In the last year I passed a tipping point - profound HL in both ears - and all the strategies (lip-reading, amplification aids, etc.) I had been using since a child no longer worked anymore :(. I can no longer interact with hearing people in the way I could - can't use phone, can't follow group conversations. This thread was a lifesaver for me.

As for Ellen in 'My Song', the impression I had was that she was born HOH and grew up struggling to hear (there was newspaper clipping praising child dancer who was deaf). After 17 years she had had enough and was learning to use sign language as she felt it suited her more.
 
AJWSmith said:
How did you guess? I thought by putting on a wig and false boobs, taking off my glasses & beard and speaking in a woman's voice I'd fool everyone... :giggle:
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:laugh2: Not the woman! :giggle: The man who 'host' "Sign Night". He remind me of you so thought would ask. :Oops:
 
I've watched this short film at least 7 or 8 times in the last few days. It hits so close to home.

I posted it to my Facebook wall for all the hearies on my list to see. I really hope people watch this and maybe finally "get it."
 
rebeccalj said:
:laugh2: Not the woman! :giggle: The man who 'host' "Sign Night". He remind me of you so thought would ask. :Oops:
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Whoops :Oops: I misunderstood! The answer is 'No' that isn't me. I didn't any involvement with this film at all sadly. It would have been a honour if I had.
 
DeafBadger said:
I've watched this short film at least 7 or 8 times in the last few days. It hits so close to home.

I posted it to my Facebook wall for all the hearies on my list to see. I really hope people watch this and maybe finally "get it."
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Do same. Girlfriend from New Jersey watch whole thing and she really touched by.
 
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