Mom left brain-tumor son alone for 2 days

Eve said:
What if she couldn’t? Sometimes parents make poor judgment calls because they feel there are no viable solutions available to them. If this mother had no options available to her, and was in fear of being court marshaled if she missed military training, and would then not be available to take care of her son later, she made a poor choice based on the options available to her.
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She wouldn't be court martialled for missing one training period. Unless she has a pattern of missing assignments, she wouldn't get into serious trouble.

Hubby just made a phone call to our friend, a captain in the Army Reserve, recently returned from Iraq. He verified everything I've posted here. She would NOT get a court martial for missing the training (unless there's a lot more to this story than we know).

The captain and I agree that in a situation such as that mom faced, she should have called her commanding officer, explained the situation, and made arrangements for a make-up training.

Any military CO would prefer to handle the situation that way then have this mess in the media. She would have been in a lot LESS trouble if she handled it the proper way, thru the chain of command. NOW, she really is in deep doo-doo.
 
Heath said:
I think Knoxville military base does have child care center.
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Child care centers don't watch kids 24/7, they never accept sick or post-op kids, and most don't accept kids that age.


She could have taken her son with her and then the military commander there, I am sure would have understood and had 2 female military guards just keep an eye on her son while she attended military training...
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Absolutely NOT! It's not the job of MPs to babysit.


... she would not have to pay a dime for child care at all.
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Not true. Military members pay for child care.
 
Reba said:
Military parents are supposed to have prior binding arrangements for child care. They're not supposed make last minute arrangements.
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hmmm interesting....Even though I didn't really know how this works with military duty but however I knew there something that should have been done by making arrangement on child care if one of the parents were in training....

Thanks Reba for this information as I'm learning something new everyday :)
 
Heath said:
... the brig (military term for jail )...
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Partly right. Brigs are for the sea services (Navy, Marine Corps, Coast Guard); CCI (stockade) is for the Army and Air Force. :P
 
Reba, I thought being AWOL was a very serious offense. Even being 5 mintunes late to work. I know that the military is really strict about the time.

When did the military stop having child care ? I know that some federal agencies do have a child care center.

If I was the military commander, I would have understood and assigned someone ( female MP's ) to keep an eye on her son then in the future she would of have had another options but I see she had to fill out a binding agreement beforehand, probably before she enlisted or upon graduation from basic training and keep the form contionously updated. I would not have chewed her out over that. Brain surgery, I can clearly understand why.

I am still not sure why she is being charged even with all the options that were available to her beforehand. Even with a binding agreement, the person ( family or legal guardian ) would have not been able to say no and it is common-sense that boy just had brain surgery, they were bound to help her with her son.
 
Heath said:
Reba, I thought being AWOL was a very serious offense. Even being 5 mintunes late to work. I know that the military is really strict about the time.
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If she contacts her command before the training that's not being AWOL.

There's a huge difference between being late for work due to sickness, heavy traffic, etc., and intentionally abandoning your post or refusing an order to appear.


When did the military stop having child care ? I know that some federal agencies do have a child care center.
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The military never provided child care. The military commanding officer of a base/post allows civilian child care facilities to contract their services for the convenience of military and civil service employees.


If I was the military commander, I would have understood and assigned someone ( female MP's ) to keep an eye on her son...
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Impossible. For one thing, MPs have their own chain of command and specific assignments. Child care is not one of them. They can't be pulled from their assigned duties to take care of someone's personal situtation.

For another thing, MPs and SPs aren't assigned to every command. None of the commands I was assigned to had MP/SPs. None of Hubby's commands had full-time SPs. Only when he was on ships did they have temporary volunteer SPs when they were in certain ports of call. If someone in the Navy needs to be dealt with out to sea and put in the brig, the Master-At-Arms handles that.
 
Heath said:
I am still not sure why she is being charged even with all the options that were available to her beforehand. ..
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She was charged and arrested by civil police, NOT the military.
 
Mommy is Dumb. Use her head! Two days after her son's brain surgery! Hello!
Should have asked one of her relatives or friends take care of him!
 
I'm not trying to be judgemental here.. but yeah.. its all common sense to know the fact that parents cannot just leave kids at home. well, the sad part is he just had surgery and she leaves him there without care. but with further investigation, we'll know the truth.
 
Okay, so let's assume for just a moment that she did ask one of her relatives or friends to come and take care of her son. That the friend or relative forgot or something else came up and she was unaware of them not showing up until she was arrested. There are always circumstances which the media does not make us aware of and we can't form logical conclusions without ALL the facts.
 
Reba said:
This article is very sketchy on details.

Where's the woman's husband?

Did she contact her command and explain the situation?

Is she active duty, reserve, or National Guard? Which service?

Normally, reservists drill on weekends. She was gone mid-week.

Miltary members who are single parents, or two military members married to each other, are required to fill out and sign documents that attest that they have provided for the care of their minor children in the case of deployment or during their duty assignments.
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Actually, Reba - I have no idea how they came up with this article since I do agree that it is sketchy. It is not up to per details as we thought it could have been to. It had no say about where the woman's husband was at when it occurred. It was not known if the mother had contacted her command and explained the situation to her commanding officers. As far as I know, She only went there for a mandatory training in Tennessee. It wasn't said of which service she is into.

So, I've googled and found all the informations that are related to this case seems to be similiar but however, I did find a small piece of additional information from another website that was reporting on this case.

Here's what was said - (The additional piece is in bold)

COX.net for Middle Georgia - Local

Woman Charged With Abandoning Son After Brain Surgery
01-12-2007 6:01 AM

(Kennesaw, GA) -- A woman charged with leaving her son home alone after the boy had brain surgery is free on bond tonight. Police said 29-year-old Darniece Howard told them she had to attend a mandatory military training in Tennessee. The boy, who has suffered from seizures in the past, told a school counselor that he had been left home alone. He had the surgery on a brain tumor within the past two weeks. The boy was slow to answer the door and was shaking when officers arrived at his house later. Howard was arrested Thursday night when she returned home. She is charged with felony child cruelty and contributing to the deprivation of a child. The boy is ok and in state custody.
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Eve said:
Okay, so let's assume for just a moment that she did ask one of her relatives or friends to come and take care of her son. That the friend or relative forgot or something else came up and she was unaware of them not showing up until she was arrested.
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Since this is an assumption - Let's say, Hypothetically - If She had went to all the resorts of trying to get her son taken care of when she was gone for the military training,etc. I would have to wonder, How can that family member or a friend forget about a child with a recent brain tumor surgery for two days? It's not hard to miss a 12 years old child. It's not like leaving a baby in a car seat on a hot summer day and only to forget that you left the baby there. And of course, it is always very imperative to be in attend when that child just had a brain tumor surgery because really, anything else could have happen while the child is recovering from the surgery.

Also, If something else had came up, There would have to be a way to get that arranged. If it was an emergency, I would have made sure that someone else would be able to stay and watch that child when I need to run out to attend an emergency.

Eve said:
There are always circumstances which the media does not make us aware of and we can't form logical conclusions without ALL the facts.
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You're right - The media always makes things out when it does not seem to have everything included. That is their job to keep us curious and it keeps us reading the informations. They control (or I should say, filter) the informations for many reason whether it's about the privacy or whatever it is. So I say, it's up to us to do further research to collaborate the stories and to make sure we are getting as much informations as we can to know what went on.
 
sounds like the motrher think Miltary is more priecous than her own son.. if my son had sugery i dont mind goin awol and endingup in brig bec its my own kid!
 
I think, Mother is the one responsible and not even think twice elsewhere should have first contact her next kin who willing taking care of her son who have brain tumor. Why can't she do it before she'll be in the military Training?
Why she left her son out and who have brain tumor so necessary feel safe?
She think her son is 12 yrs old over and can home alone but not even think twice her son's health condition? No making an excuse anyway...
Therefore Media can be perfect nope.. always different stories between other media.. Rest of case and wait see what happen the next court and comes in the release fully story.
 
Jolie_77 said:
Actually, Reba - I have no idea how they came up with this article since I do agree that it is sketchy. . .

So, I've googled and found all the informations that are related to this case seems to be similiar but however, I did find a small piece of additional information from another website that was reporting on this case.

Here's what was said - (The additional piece is in bold)

COX.net for Middle Georgia - Local
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Thanks for trying to get more info. :)
 
Jolie_77 said:
Since this is an assumption - Let's say, Hypothetically - If She had went to all the resorts of trying to get her son taken care of when she was gone for the military training,etc. I would have to wonder, How can that family member or a friend forget about a child with a recent brain tumor surgery for two days? It's not hard to miss a 12 years old child. It's not like leaving a baby in a car seat on a hot summer day and only to forget that you left the baby there. And of course, it is always very imperative to be in attend when that child just had a brain tumor surgery because really, anything else could have happen while the child is recovering from the surgery.

Also, If something else had came up, There would have to be a way to get that arranged. If it was an emergency, I would have made sure that someone else would be able to stay and watch that child when I need to run out to attend an emergency.



You're right - The media always makes things out when it does not seem to have everything included. That is their job to keep us curious and it keeps us reading the informations. They control (or I should say, filter) the informations for many reason whether it's about the privacy or whatever it is. So I say, it's up to us to do further research to collaborate the stories and to make sure we are getting as much informations as we can to know what went on.
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Exactly, very good post there Jolie_77!!!
 
^Angel^ said:
Sheesh here we go again....I for one do not care of the reason why the mother had to leave her brain surgery son home alone, and look what happened? it cost her to lose her son....nice going!!
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I agree here...looks like it was a no win situation. How the situation happened in the first place could have been prevented whether it was by the mother or by the military. The point is whoever is at fault, it should not have happened in the first place. Something could have been done but what? guess we have to wait and see what the mother has to say.
 
Reba, thank you for information...

I have check with my co-workers on this since you know I work for US government. Some of them explained that the parent are allow to excuse themselves to stay with their sick children or who just have surgery etc.

Jolie_77, thank you for provide other link.

Some of you know that my son had head surgery in June 2005. I'm allow to excuse myself to stay with him up to 10 days after came home from hospitail. That's why I can't say anything because I didn't know anything about US law about allow parent to excuse themselves to take care of their sick children or who had just surgery.... I hope it will be update because I want to hear mother's side and want to know why mother left her son who just had brain surgery. I can't image to leave my son who just came home from hospital for go to training.
 
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Jolie_77 said:
Since this is an assumption - Let's say, Hypothetically - If She had went to all the resorts of trying to get her son taken care of when she was gone for the military training,etc. I would have to wonder, How can that family member or a friend forget about a child with a recent brain tumor surgery for two days? It's not hard to miss a 12 years old child. It's not like leaving a baby in a car seat on a hot summer day and only to forget that you left the baby there. And of course, it is always very imperative to be in attend when that child just had a brain tumor surgery because really, anything else could have happen while the child is recovering from the surgery.

Also, If something else had came up, There would have to be a way to get that arranged. If it was an emergency, I would have made sure that someone else would be able to stay and watch that child when I need to run out to attend an emergency.

You're right - The media always makes things out when it does not seem to have everything included. That is their job to keep us curious and it keeps us reading the informations. They control (or I should say, filter) the informations for many reason whether it's about the privacy or whatever it is. So I say, it's up to us to do further research to collaborate the stories and to make sure we are getting as much informations as we can to know what went on.
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Well, I can see the difference. It's pretty logical for anyone to judge a mother who leave her child alone in the car during hot summer because it's total WRONG to leave child alone in the car but this situation about 12 years old boy... We rather to have both side... because the medias like to make negative against anyone... Yes, I'm wondering why a mother left her brain tumor son who had brain surgery few days ago for go to training. I can't say anything because I didn't know US law and mother's side until Reba brought this information and then I check with my co-workers... mmmhhh! I as mother would not do that because I know the child who is sick or surgery need mother around... I hope this situation will be update then we will know more from her side why she do that before we can judge...
 
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