Long read....
A long read, but here is my response! I posted this on another forum I belong to, and is relevant here.
Naturally, as a gay man I am against Proposition 8. I do not believe that discrimination should be written into any constitution, state or federal. I also believe on a state and federal level, gay marriages should be recognized. This does not mean that I believe a Church should legally have to marry gay people. I believe this is where the line is blurred.
Gay marriage is not about gay people walking into a religious institution and getting married. The fact of the matter is, gay people getting married in churches will happen whether or not it is 'legal'. The issue at hand is a marriage license not being granted or recognized by the state, and gay people not getting equal legal rights that come with a state recognized marriage license. It has nothing to do with religion. It has everything to do with equal rights under the law.
Unfortunately, even if states recognize gay marriages, because of President Clinton's stupid decision to sign the DOMA the marriage will still not be federally recognized. So a gay couple who is legally married (in CT or MA) can file jointly for state taxes, but not federal taxes. And there are of course no kinds of federal protection under the law.
Really what should happen is that the title of "marriage license" should be changed. That way, everyone goes to a court house to get a "Civil Union License" or "Yipa doo da License", and then those people are recognized under the law as a Union and are therefore granted certain rights under the law. Then if people choose to do so, they can go to a Church and get married.
And one side note, after reading some past posts...... parents cannot shield their children from the world. Sorry, it can't happen. Growing up, I knew I was gay. From a very young age I knew I liked boys, not girls. My parents didn't have to teach me about an "alternative lifestyle" for me to know what I wanted. Also, at least in my school, my parents had to sign a paper saying it was ok for me to attend sex ed class when we had to learn about that. If the parents didn't sign the paper, the kid didn't have to go. No reason that couldn't be done again. But I digress....
If a kid is going to be gay, the kid is going to be gay. What is damaging to the child is not to nurture or discuss these kinds of feelings, but to condemn these feelings. The highest rate of suicide is among LGBT teenagers. Why? Because they're constantly told it is wrong, disgusting, against God, against this against that, yadda yadda yadda. Couple that with the fact that you can't get married, there are people who want to kill you for who you are, and God doesn't love you anymore. Not much reason to live.....
I'm extremely fortunate for my family. I was never told I was less than human, that I was disgusting, CHOOSING to "act" on unnatural feelings. When I came out at 15, my parents said "ok, we want you to be happy, safe, healthy... if this is who you are, we don't love you any less and we are here to love and support you". To think I was ever afraid to come out to them.... but many kids are, because of how their parents talk about the issue, how society views the issue. That its an "alternative lifestyle".... uh, no. Living out in the woods in a cave with bears is an alternative lifestyle. Who I love is not a lifestyle.
Whether or not you are for gay marriage is not the issue. The issue is the rights that come with a marriage license. Gays (or straights) don't have to get married in a church. And even if gay marriage is illegal, gay people can and will still get married in churches. It has NOTHING to do with the religious institution of marriage, and EVERYTHING to do with the state and federal institution of marriage.
Secondly, would you deny black people the right to get married? They are a minority, and it was once illegal. How about interracial marriages? Another minority, and was once illegal. Would you support the ban of American Sign Language, the language used by the Deaf? Because they are a minority, and were once not allowed to use their own language. Rewind a couple hundred years: Look at those native americans over there doing a spirit dance-- they look nuts! They're a majority, but let's kill em all anyway.
To deny rights to anyone is NOT OK. Its been done in the past to many groups of people, many minorities, and it is still being done. In the 21st century. In America. Freakin' South Africa recognizes gay marriages.
There was a time when it was illegal for blacks to marry whites. When it was finally done away with, there were parents shielding their children's eyes from the danger of seeing an interracial couple. There were people that thought it was the end of society, the downfall of America, and the destruction of the institution of marriage. But its not. Everything is still fine. And its the same with gay marriage. It isn't going to change YOU or YOUR LIFE if I get married to my partner. And you clearly DO have something against homosexuals as you are so quick to deny rights to them.
Marriage between a man and a woman is also not the foundation of society. In ancient times, men married men, women married women, men married women and had boys to screw around with, etc etc. The idea that marriage should be strictly between a man and a woman is, in the grand scheme of history and time, a new idea.
If you're against gay marriage as a religious institution, more power to you. But you MUST separate the religious institution of marriage from the state and federal marriage license. They are different, and do and mean completely different things.
There is so much wrong in the world... with all the hate in the world, why should we be condemned because of who we love?
I know not everyone agrees, and everyone is entitled to their opinion. I certainly don't hold it against anyone! I have a very good friend who loves me as a friend, but does not "agree" with my "lifestyle", and hey that is their view and why should I not be friends with them for it? But these are simply my beliefs.