Lack of interaction with women

Girls are more immature in college? How about those frat boys? I bet your perpsectives on girls are stemming from your religious background.

Seriously, just wash your brain and stop with the stereotypes. Don't expect to form a relationship right away. Make friends and get to know the people in whatever community you are in and let them get to know you better. Your friends in college are flakes, so wait until you are finished with school.

There is no biological deadline, so take your time. Obsessing won't make you happy.
 
You can make realistic goals. Like, meet a woman, tell her that you list 100 items on E Bay per week. If she is interested, then she'll want to share her feedbacks about E Bay with you.

That would not work with me :P May I suggest talking about cats or dogs or animals? That's usually a good subject.
 
Matty, you're trying too hard to fit in.
You don't go around hunting to find girls. Girls find you.

I suggest giving up the "I'm the loser, I'll never find a girlfriend." attitude and do something more productive in life.

Didn't you say you go to the gym?
You could go try some cardio or swim or other things they offer for your gym membership and make a good use out of your time.
 
hi matty :wave:

I quickly skimmed thru this thread and I may have missed a couple of parts so I'll ask you a few questions -

1. what do you think what seems to be a problem about you when it comes to meeting or finding a girl?
2. do you have Asperger's?
3. I saw your videos in other thread about BSL or something. I saw how you wave "hi". Is that how you normally wave hi to people?
 
Yeah...and all those girls pixs that he posted....all slim and skinny....Why not try with a overweight girl or a chubby one?....And don't make any wise-cracks about her weight!....If you get along with her and enjoy her personality...then maybe later she might join the gym with you....These days, I see a lot of real skinny guys with chubby/overweight girls.....A lot of them are real good cooks....and of course!...will keep you warm in the winter!....:giggle:

:lol:

Believe it or not, I pay attention to fatter chicks in public. I see some good lookin fatter chicks at Walmart. They know how to look nice. :D Skinny bitches and good lookin bitches have bad attitude... These days I have no respect for them.

In my 20s, I was single and hating it very much!! I did have girlfriend from age 31 to 33 and then other one at 33 to 34, and then other one at 34 to present(35).

WHile I do have a girlfriend now, I look back and wish that I would have done things in my 20s to enjoy life instead of sitting and moping that I was depressed about not having a girlfriend. It was not until my late 20s that I found my niche with bikes. I'm not saying that you've to sell bikes, but I hope you do have a hobby.

I've no job. It does not stop me. I would make goals such as list 100 items per week on E Bay. I think that is a realistic goal for someone who is self employed. I did it for myself.

You can make realistic goals. Like, meet a woman, tell her that you list 100 items on E Bay per week. If she is interested, then she'll want to share her feedbacks about E Bay with you.

People come in all sizes!!!

My first gf who I was sexually involved with when I was 19. I was with her maybe 6 months. She dumped me b/c I let two ugly girls give me oral sex. In my 20s I really didnt have a gf but I didnt sit around mopin. I was free as a bird. I visited strip clubs a lot and had a lot of lap dances and couple of oral sex one night stands. I was a happy guy. Now, Im in 30s and Im dealing with lies and feels like Im force to have a kid. Know what Im mean,here? Its like Im not allowed to have fun. Makes me so fuckin angry...sometimes I cant even think straight. No one can tell me how to live my life. Its not my fault Im not very sociable person b.c of my very bad ears. I like to talk about my life here so you guys can see what Im dealing with. Sucks to be deaf b/c you really cant defend yourself,mentally. Fucking punks,poor hicks and closed minded uneducated jealous folks. Ppl like to take advantage of me b/c I dont have very many friends.Im like Doc Holiday,if you will. Friends I have on facebook are mad cool to me. I enjoy that. I was told in other deaf forum that a lot of deaf guys deal with audism and Im not the only one. Hell, ppl would have a big problem with me making friends on here.
 
:lol:

Believe it or not, I pay attention to fatter chicks in public. I see some good lookin fatter chicks at Walmart. They know how to look nice. :D Skinny bitches and good lookin bitches have bad attitude... These days I have no respect for them.



My first gf who I was sexually involved with when I was 19. I was with her maybe 6 months. She dumped me b/c I let two ugly girls give me oral sex. In my 20s I really didnt have a gf but I didnt sit around mopin. I was free as a bird. I visited strip clubs a lot and had a lot of lap dances and couple of oral sex one night stands. I was a happy guy. Now, Im in 30s and Im dealing with lies and feels like Im force to have a kid. Know what Im mean,here? Its like Im not allowed to have fun. Makes me so fuckin angry...sometimes I cant even think straight. No one can tell me how to live my life. Its not my fault Im not very sociable person b.c of my very bad ears. I like to talk about my life here so you guys can see what Im dealing with. Sucks to be deaf b/c you really cant defend yourself,mentally. Fucking punks,poor hicks and closed minded uneducated jealous folks. Ppl like to take advantage of me b/c I dont have very many friends.Im like Doc Holiday,if you will. Friends I have on facebook are mad cool to me. I enjoy that. I was told in other deaf forum that a lot of deaf guys deal with audism and Im not the only one. Hell, ppl would have a big problem with me making friends on here.

I sympathy with you. I am 35. My girlfriend is 29. She is hoping that we would have kids in maybe 2 years or 3. I wish I would wait 6 or 7 years, but that won't happen. Yeah, it is tough when we are older. We don't have that kind of luxury. Yeah, we all have to make sacrifices in a relationship.

so, Matty, if you're reading this, enjoy your freedom now. When you get a relationship, you won't enjoy it any more.

Yeah, the price of having a relationship.
 
You relationship prblem seems normal

I grew up in HoH household, but didn't really have any deaf friends. Basically, I was looked upon as an outcast or just someone to ignore. The only long term relationships were with women that needed an immigrant visa. The only other close relationship with a woman in "rebound". She was breaking up with her longtime soulmate and used me for filler for a few months. She started going back to him, making excuses to cancel dates with me. Eventually just dumped me via email.
 
Yeah...and all those girls pixs that he posted....all slim and skinny....Why not try with a overweight girl or a chubby one?....And don't make any wise-cracks about her weight!....If you get along with her and enjoy her personality...then maybe later she might join the gym with you....These days, I see a lot of real skinny guys with chubby/overweight girls.....A lot of them are real good cooks....and of course!...will keep you warm in the winter!....:giggle:

My ex gf was the overweight or chubby one. It didn't bother me until she depressed about it. Its so annoying when girls talk about their bad image. It pisses me off. I feel like never going to date a chubby one yet again because of their poor body image is disgusting poor attitude.

Go out and enjoy yourself, with girls or not. You don't have to drink if you don't want to (though it helps), you don't have to be a social butterfly (though again, it can help) but just sitting there and feeling miserable is only going to result in more sitting there and feeling miserable.

I don't drink alcohol and never will. Neither smoking. I don't go to clubs, since I'm an aspie. I don't like crowded people who drinks and get drunk. Not my scene and it seems pretty stupid if it is. I have poor social skills because I have lack of acceptance of these people letting me to experience the social environment. However, majority of people here at uni is always go to clubs and drink to get drunk. I'm not comfortable with this because of their poor communication is making me frustrated and giving me hard time. I felt like why you let me to come here and give me hard time? I never had a situation of sitting there and being miserable. I don't do that. Sometimes at social places I don't really have any one to talk with because people, especially women easily seek I have poor social skills. I don't know how they judge this.

Even volunteering is a good place to meet other people, as it's in my own thoughts to do some volunteer work very soon...but not to just find a partner, it's to be around other people and to interract with them.

I am volunteer-internship with JCU environmental sustainability group. It is one of my greatest passion of what I wanted to do. However, I don't look for a partner for this case. I just love the environment and nature. However, I had a lot of problems meeting people through the group. I feel that there is lack of connectedness and understanding between other members and myself. This year, the campus green team is running poorly. Lack of organisation, no meetings, no events. Only event I hosted was the earth hour here at the college. Quite a few people turned up. Social wise, only I talk to the other residential committee people. Then I went to the college green competition for $1000 cash prize, it was unsuccessful. No one turned up. Just none. Especially people told me they are definitely are going. But that was a pure lie. I have been advertising, emails twice that week, lot of posters signs, Facebook event page and the speaker announcer. No one turned up. I had a feeling that no one accepts the challenge of me being involved. I am the organiser for that part. I got angry more because of poor attitude flying around everywhere I go! I had a enough. I used to go for other college past 2 years, they not really even turning up because of similar circumstances. That college is way more drunker and sexual. Its so alcoholic. More like true stories of The Wolf Pack and American Pie series. Not very distinctive about that! Now one more semester of uni. It may get worse, trying to organise something that would be successful for my CV or portfolio. It get uglier each week. I have no idea what and how the poor attitude of people here at the uni. Its very large campus. Over 25,000 people study here, with 1500 live on campus. That just shocking. I believe that is way worse off than typical mid city universities like Brisbane, Gold Coast. Newcastle, Sydney, Lismore, Melbourne and Canberra etc. Also worse than American colleges whose are way more organised and better than ours. I am so glad I have one more semester left to get out of this terrible shit hole. I wish I can blow this place up.

Girls are more immature in college? How about those frat boys? I bet your perpsectives on girls are stemming from your religious background.

Seriously, just wash your brain and stop with the stereotypes. Don't expect to form a relationship right away. Make friends and get to know the people in whatever community you are in and let them get to know you better. Your friends in college are flakes, so wait until you are finished with school.

There is no biological deadline, so take your time. Obsessing won't make you happy.

Oh YES! Girls are way way way way more immature than guys here! Girls have much more freedom. They are so drunken and sexual easily. Their attitude is so moody and stupid. So superficial and lustre. They are like terrible bitches, witches, nasties and shallow. Guys not so much. There is no frats here. Not in Australia. Guys still get drunk and that, but their power does not reach to that immature level as women does. Guys have more control. Women here are like screaming, yelling, bitching about people, get drunk for casual sex with a football player etc etc as you know it.

What an alternative option of saying instead of being stereotypical? There is no way to come across that if there something is truly a fact, or something is exactly happening? I'm not trying to label people. I am saying as who they are. I do know what it is. I'm having trouble meeting people off campus because this city is quite similar to what the uni lifestyle is like. Its a party alcoholic environment. Because its a tropical climate.

I always wanted to get married in my 20s like my sister, my cousins and few of people I knew from uni. They are all seem very happy and successful. I just thought I should deserved that because I am good guy too and needs it. You can't get around it like this?

Matty, you're trying too hard to fit in.
You don't go around hunting to find girls. Girls find you.

I suggest giving up the "I'm the loser, I'll never find a girlfriend." attitude and do something more productive in life.

Didn't you say you go to the gym?
You could go try some cardio or swim or other things they offer for your gym membership and make a good use out of your time.

I am not trying too hard at all! I don't even go hunting at all. I going to say this, it just happens when I meet them in general. Especially from walking past them from eye catching scenarios here at the college and classes. And also few I meet and get interact in classes and groups. I have no intentions of asking any one a date because I wasn't even thinking about it. However, what turns me off is the ladder theory proves truly right. They always see me in wrong way. They see me I want to date and fuck them. I have not mention anything about dating or relationship or sex. Nor the movements of my attitude and approach. I have no idea how what caused them to think like that. So the ladder theory proves it right. I lost this game, terribly. Couldn't make new friends any more because of the ladder theory.

I go to gym and take a run freely every week. Have a look at my thread in fitness forum section to find out more information.

I quickly skimmed thru this thread and I may have missed a couple of parts so I'll ask you a few questions -

1. what do you think what seems to be a problem about you when it comes to meeting or finding a girl?
2. do you have Asperger's?
3. I saw your videos in other thread about BSL or something. I saw how you wave "hi". Is that how you normally wave hi to people?

Hello!

1. The problem I feel very confidently about they don't understand me. Of course I told them I have aspergers and hearing loss. They just don't acknowledge it. They are like said, oh yeah I understand it, its okay. That is a pure lie! Afterwards, they don't act as friends any more. The ladder theory proves it right here too. I don't really find a girl. To my point of my rant is they are ruining the natural circumstances by judging my disabilities easily. I mean every single of them I met in my life. Ladder theory proves that I am a pure loser.

2. Yes I do, I am coping it very well. Its only mild. I don't even care I feel to have it because it not my big problem. I am fine with it and sometimes I feel I don't even have one.

3. I don't generally say hi in BSL like that. It just a gesture. So, I just wave like a normal wave to a person who knew like walking past, across the road, in class and that etc. Nothing a big deal.

So, Matty, if you're reading this, enjoy your freedom now. When you get a relationship, you won't enjoy it any more.

Yeah, the price of having a relationship.

Well freedom is everyday living situation for me. You saying that I shouldn't have a wife because my freedom goes blunt? I see happy marriages still have freedom, they go to holidays, go to gym and take a run or walk in park or on beach. That is freedom. I find this comment is biased.

Price of a relationship is no difference to have it with your family. Your soul mate or life partner is your new family. Especially after marriage it makes a family of your own. I want this, including the 7 superb qualities of healthy relationship. I find women in general public including here at the uni does not acknowledge the 7 qualities. Everything is a pure lie here.
-----------------------------------------
Now I replied all of those questions above. Took me half an hour to answer them all with a bang. So, I tell you what is happening next. My sister, is 24 and she is getting married this November. She been together with her fiancée since high school, which has been 9 years. I liked this sort of relationship. This is what I really wanted, including wanted to get married in 20s. Now that chance is becoming slimmer than normal because lack of good attitude in general world. I can't find a good proper female friend any more because of their poor demanding ugly attitude against my conditions.

So, about the wedding. I got offered to be a groomsmen. I felt like WOW. So, a single and bachelor and V guy at the wedding being a groomsmen is embarrassing to me. Its a label of me as being success with a lady of future. But lack of that. So this wedding is not long after I complete my final exams which will complete my bachelor degree.

However, not long after the wedding. I'll be heading off to US and Canada for 12months VISA working holiday with the Australian program. I'll be starting to work at ski resort at Park City in Utah for 3-4months season. Then I will be free, hanging around the US and travel into Canada visiting Vancouver and Toronto. Now, this may be ever life changing situation to me. I'm a little confused how to prepare this change. Because it is so different, I never travelled overseas before. And I am going to my favourite country in the world, which is US. Since high school (hopefully I don't jump on conclusions here), I always talk to my mate (he is still now though) about my passion of American lady. I always have passion about them. I just don't know why. There are heeps of American exchangers here on campus, but they are all mostly Marine Biologists and drink massive consumptions of alcoholic as result from Australian people are forcing them to.

So, I have no such idea what is going to happen over there. I would highly appreciate of meeting someone special. Its too hard to come back to Australia and get so low on standards which easily let you to marry a wrong one.

Okay I stop here now, thanks.
 
Look at you slandering girls left and right. No wonder you couldn't find someone. I promise you will find the same types here in the US and that there are Aussie men just as bad as the women you described. If you meet me, you won't get a date out of me because of your attitude.

As for being solo at a wedding, big deal. I am single and went to my brother's wedding as a bride's maid. Many of my brother's best men (and best friends) were single. Many people who attended the wedding were single, too.
 
Look at you slandering girls left and right. No wonder you couldn't find someone. I promise you will find the same types here in the US and that there are Aussie men just as bad as the women you described. If you meet me, you won't get a date out of me because of your attitude.

As for being solo at a wedding, big deal. I am single and went to my brother's wedding as a bride's maid. Many of my brother's best men (and best friends) were single. Many people who attended the wedding were single, too.

This is how women treat me in general, by judging my attitude. Okay........so If I don't have bad attitude, then why I am being so successful at my uni studies, fitness and money? My family loves me.

I think you are seeing yourself as massive criticism of seeing someone talking about the truth of ladder theory and complications. I don't have a bad attitude, the attitude on the reflection of me responding to all of the questions here does not prove I am happy or not. To be honest, you are seeing the response as a big deal as what you think you are. I am very happy person. I said that, you can't make a judge of someone happiness and being blamed at?

So thank you very much for your poor demanding attitude. I tell you all what, to all the readers on this thread. This is prime example of how women approach upon of reaction. I find this really offensive. I happily approach people in general and get a same result. What if I do the opposite? Police would be knocking on my door...

So your reaction shows that you are NOT happy. I tend to stay away from that. Don't even bother talking to me again.

PS: I wish I can make sense. Trying to put together the words right. It is so difficult for me to put it together to help people to understand my situation. This could be one of my weakness in terms of women approach to me.
 
This is how women treat me in general, by judging my attitude. Okay........so If I don't have bad attitude, then why I am being so successful at my uni studies, fitness and money? My family loves me.

I think you are seeing yourself as massive criticism of seeing someone talking about the truth of ladder theory and complications. I don't have a bad attitude, the attitude on the reflection of me responding to all of the questions here does not prove I am happy or not. To be honest, you are seeing the response as a big deal as what you think you are. I am very happy person. I said that, you can't make a judge of someone happiness and being blamed at?

So thank you very much for your poor demanding attitude. I tell you all what, to all the readers on this thread. This is prime example of how women approach upon of reaction. I find this really offensive. I happily approach people in general and get a same result. What if I do the opposite? Police would be knocking on my door...

So your reaction shows that you are NOT happy. I tend to stay away from that. Don't even bother talking to me again.

PS: I wish I can make sense. Trying to put together the words right. It is so difficult for me to put it together to help people to understand my situation. This could be one of my weakness in terms of women approach to me.

I understand what you are saying, but you just can't see outside of yourself to see how your attitude is turning off people. Yes, your family loves you because they raised you and know you and because you are part of their family. But when you are out meeting people, they see you putting down people. Calling someone dirty because of a pair of shorts is NOT cool and not true. Looking down on people won't earn you friendship points. If you feel someone is looking down on you, you just walk away or ignore them. Also, attitude is not one single thing. You can have an attitude about family, another about relationships, another about life, and so on. I am specifically talking about attitude towards other people. Also, being buff, rich, and successful doesn't win over people if you look down on them. Sure, you see women flocking towards men who are also buff, rich, and successful, but are those men calling those women dirty, hippie, nerdy, etc. because of how they dress? Probably not.
 
I feel like never going to date a chubby one yet again because of their poor body image is disgusting poor attitude.

Having a poor body image doesn't neccessarily have anything to do with being overweight.


I don't drink alcohol and never will. Neither smoking. I don't go to clubs, since I'm an aspie. I don't like crowded people who drinks and get drunk. Not my scene and it seems pretty stupid if it is. I have poor social skills because I have lack of acceptance of these people letting me to experience the social environment. However, majority of people here at uni is always go to clubs and drink to get drunk. I'm not comfortable with this because of their poor communication is making me frustrated and giving me hard time. I felt like why you let me to come here and give me hard time? I never had a situation of sitting there and being miserable. I don't do that. Sometimes at social places I don't really have any one to talk with because people, especially women easily seek I have poor social skills. I don't know how they judge this.

Yeah yeah, I said I didn't like alcohol either, once. That's your choice but remember it's a social lubricant, it can help people get along because it relaxes you. You don't have to drink to get plastered.

You don't have to go clubbing but you should go out and do *something*. I'll leave it up to you to decide what that activity will be.

This is how women treat me in general, by judging my attitude. Okay........so If I don't have bad attitude, then why I am being so successful at my uni studies, fitness and money? My family loves me.

Being a successful student/bodybuilder/worker have... hey!... nothing to do with being socially adept. You could be awesome at all or any of this things and still be a complete d*ck to people.

You've convinced yourself that everyone are scumbags who are out to get you, and yet you crave their attention and affection? I'm reminded of Homer Simpson who once said: "Why don't those stupid idiots let me in their crappy club for jerks?"

Every person you meet deserves the benefit of the doubt and to be treated well until they give good reason to be treated otherwise (and in that case, better just to leave rather than stick around being unpleasant). Coming into every social situation unhappy, angry and defensive is going to put people off immediately.
 
However, what turns me off is the ladder theory proves truly right. They always see me in wrong way. They see me I want to date and fuck them. I have not mention anything about dating or relationship or sex. Nor the movements of my attitude and approach. I have no idea how what caused them to think like that. So the ladder theory proves it right. I lost this game, terribly.
You know this, how??

How do you know they are thinking you want to have fun in bed?
Did you say something to them?


Couldn't make new friends any more because of the ladder theory.
Too early to say man, you are giving up too quickly.
 
You know this, how??

How do you know they are thinking you want to have fun in bed?
Did you say something to them?

35etng.jpg


GIRL: Hi!
MATTYINAUS: :naughty:
 
You don't go around hunting to find girls. Girls find you.

While this does happen, for the most part, it's the guy who does the hunting because that is what women are expecting. Just sayin...
 
:roll:Is it possible to surmise that what is really happening re:" interaction with women" that one really wants a "female version of oneself"?:roll:

Does that "fit" what has happened so far?

aside: I am NOT a psychiatrist though have some actual experience in dealing with Hearing loss/deafness over 40 plus years.
 
Matty, as long as you're seeking a woman to fit your needs instead of being a man that will fit the woman's needs, you will have a looooonnnnngggg search.

The truth is, until you can learn to focus on others instead of self, you will never be satisfied. You will come across as self centered, and that doesn't appeal to anyone. You have to develop empathy and interest in other people, not in yourself.

Women don't like the "hey, look at me, I'm so great" guys, and they don't like the "poor, miserable, picked on me" guys either. A woman wants a guy who focuses on the woman, not on the guy himself. We are also attracted to men who show an interest in other people and causes.

What do you think attracts a woman more?

a. "I'm sorry, I can't take you out tonight because I have to go to the gym and make myself buff."

b. "I'm sorry, I can't take you out tonight because the volunteer at the animal shelter called in sick and I have to fill in for him."

Another choice:

a. "Do you want to go to the gym with me and watch me work out?"

b. "Do you want to ride with me while I deliver Meals on Wheels?"



Instead of thinking this:

a. "This is how women treat me in general, by judging my attitude." (from your post)

Think this:

b. "How do I treat women in general? What is my attitude towards them?"
 
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