Just introducing myself.

Hoh112 said:
@ Chicago Blue - I hate the feeling of losing the left ear too. I feel like it goes too slow
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Oh, it does. Been that way since '08. Slowly declining since '11. Actually I'm a little surprised I still have it now. I thought I would lose a lot more when I turned 30 in 2013.
 
@ chicagoblue - yeah ut can be psycholigical a bit as it goes so slow.
@derek - parents are from skokie I belueve they went to siu
@lissa - nuce to meet you! Thank you for saying hello.
 
Hoh112 said:
NYNY -
Alleycat - I wish I grew up big D. I think it is too easy for parents to just sit where they are comfortable to really go outside their paradigm or really consider what it is to be deaf or hard of hearing...and make the right choices. Seems like to me it becomes "their" struggle, rather than a child's natural right to getting 100% information completely...Big D would have suited me very well.

Deafdyke - no HOH, Dhh program growing up. I did go to AG bell twice, both during the camps for the children (LOFT) but that was only for a few weeks and there was no lasting involvement (effort on my own or parents) - I grew to resent deaf and hard of hearing people because of course, I was hearing! (AG Bell is strongly oral and stoic considering "we can do it even though we don't have it..." - Of course everyone knows how AG Bell truly felt about deaf and hard of hearing people, no matter how assimilated...in that man's mind there was always a separation of inferiority...like most today.

Parents took me to an ontologist (sp?) in Dallas, Dr. Rowland. He recommended the oral mainstream way when I don't understand how an onotlogist (sp) is an educator, psychologist and social theorist all in one....hearing aids at third grade. Enough audiogram tests that I can cheat on them.

I think it's a stupid mentality to have for parents as the goal should be getting the information to the child, and putting them in the correct social setting with like children so that they grow up socially fit. I feel that would be the greatest way for a child to become emotionally, socially stable with a great chance at having a financially successful career. That being said, I missed out on a lot of social events and I have pretty serious depressions at times.
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Right on with everything...... I mean even an oral deaf program or a magnet program would have been so much easier right? And yeah.....I think that the goal needs to be to equipt dhh kids with as much tools as possible, rather then the " gotta assimulate into the greater society mentality........
 
deafdyke said:
NYNY, and Hoh112, do you wish you'd had access to at least a dhh program growing up? You guys sound like you grew up pretty much "very little access to dhh stuff like regional programs or even summer camps" and mostly hearing stuff right?
Just really annoys me that the mentality for dhh and other kids with all sorts of disabilities, is that we're supposed to magically assimilate into the greater society with little/no specialized disability support......
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What dhh programs? I went to speech therapy and that was the extent of it. I was fortunate in an odd way. Yep, integrated into the hearing world (my parents were really smart but they didn't know anything about being deaf). They did figure out what happened when I couldn't hear much.

If we could turn back the clock 50 years ago, I'd still end up making the same decision because the HA purchased for me was enough of a catalyst to get me through that part of my life. My extrovert social skills will never be really good but I don't associate with many people anymore. The friends I have understand the awkwardness of what I've stepped into - not hearing and the distortion.

I've looked into dhh programs over the last few years and feel awkward as heck. It's what happens when you mix Deaf and deaf and end up hearing then going deaf. I don't like it but it is the way it is.

So, I can't wish for stuff (wishing doesn't make things materialize) but it would be nice to have a mass infusion of signing that I could instantly grasp :) .
 
deafdyke said:
Right on with everything...... I mean even an oral deaf program or a magnet program would have been so much easier right? And yeah.....I think that the goal needs to be to equipt dhh kids with as much tools as possible, rather then the " gotta assimulate into the greater society mentality........
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deafdyke: I thought I was going to be mildly clobbered by my response because I know how polarizing Deaf vs deaf can be. We don't have to be assimilated by Borg (and in our case it is the world of hearing). But it is easier for me and for those I know because it's the life we know.

I'm also never going to be part of the "greater social mentality." I have a working mind of my own that I've spent years learning and relearning and undoing the junk fed to me by society that tends to be bogus.
 
I agree wishing does not change but the lessons we have recieved through experience is cruical and could position us to be able to help others.
Dhh programs that I went towere too little and insufficent to really build the self confidence and social skills needed to grow.
 
Sorry, my posts are out of order,

Welcome to the board.
 
Hoh112 said:
I agree wishing does not change but the lessons we have recieved through experience is cruical and could position us to be able to help others.
Dhh programs that I went towere too little and insufficent to really build the self confidence and social skills needed to grow.
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I agree with you 100%. On this forum we all seem to be trying to impart that in one way or another.

The Dhh program was odd because I walked through doors of another culture - one I had experienced before but not to that extent. My hearing partner joined me and saw the confusion. It just didn't work for me but I'm sure it worked well for many others.
 
Howdy! I am a HoH. I wear hearing aids and have severe to profound loss. Mainstreamed in school from day one til graduation from high school. Twelve years of speech therapy. I to am between worlds and find it hard to fit in. Most of my friends that I have are few but very close to me with great understanding of what works best in any environment for me. I do have two - three friends that use ASL. One of my friend is deaf and has no voice. She is the best ever. My closest friend that I have is an interpreter and a teacher. When we are hanging out. She's teaching me. There's a good support from many of us here. I have picked up on good resources and new friends.
 
:wave:welcome HOh112
in relation to your post#13 where you mention your voice same as hearing - that's my hub exactly. He has a much more severe hearing level/'loss' than me but has a much better voice/speech. Like AlleyCat, he was raised very hearing in a small town, mainstream solitaire.

I don't know if I was born hoh of not. Mom says doc told her I was born missing inner ear bones. I was born very premature in the 70's.
But I actually became aware that my hearing was changing maybe about 5 years ago when I didn't hear my husband call me while we were dog training.
I ID as hoh...technically mild loss but also have noticeable speech issues people can have a hard time understanding me. Have auditory processing issues also and degree of my hearing depends on room acoustics and lots of other things. Have problems on phone.

we have the captions on for me all the time; hubby doesn't see well enough or read quickly enough to use them.
 
I like the similarities! Gre up in a suburb of dallas. Blows my mind my parents did not investigate the other side - with the resources in the surrounding area...
 
Hoh112 said:
I like the similarities! Gre up in a suburb of dallas. Blows my mind my parents did not investigate the other side - with the resources in the surrounding area...
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One of the biggest mistakes that parents of kids with special needs (not just dhh) make is the assumption that all their kid needs is mainstream/ "normal" stuff, and they forget that SPECIALIZED stuff like schools/classes/camps etc may also be REALLY useful, even for kids who do well/appear to do well in the mainstream or who are mildly affected. .....It just seems like a lot of parents are afraid to explore more specialized resources......It's like they think if they do, their kid will not be "included" or it's thinking that admitting they need specialized stuff is actually ADMITTING their kid is "different" .....It is VERY VERY possible for kids to have that balance....and the overwhelming majority of kids DO have plenty of exposure to the mainstream....including kids who attend specialized schools, use specialized methodolgies etc etc etc.......Plopping a kid in the mainstream with little/no exposure to specialized stuff is IGNORING the fact that a kid could really benefit from those things......
 
deafdyke,

I'm sure you would agree that parents slip into a state of denial if their child is not "normal" for most any reason. As you said, it's a matter of admitting and accepting. I think it's also the parents' fear of what others will think of them and their child (children) that overrides their acceptance.
 
deafdyke: There is no state of denial if someone is ignorant about something. Parents do what they know. They expand their search to make more educated decisions. But the odds are likely good that hearing parents will use mainstream schools.

If both parents are hearing and working, learning ASL and the culture is time-consuming and that likely adds to their decision. Same for Deaf parents - they have to be somewhat mainstreamed - understand the hearing portion of society - if they're going to send their Deaf child to deaf school.

artr: Right on.
 
NYNY said:
deafdyke: There is no state of denial if someone is ignorant about something. Parents do what they know. They expand their search to make more educated decisions. But the odds are likely good that hearing parents will use mainstream schools.

If both parents are hearing and working, learning ASL and the culture is time-consuming and that likely adds to their decision. Same for Deaf parents - they have to be somewhat mainstreamed - understand the hearing portion of society - if they're going to send their Deaf child to deaf school.

artr: Right on.
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Yeah, I know.....So much of it is being misinformed, and the assumption that all a kid needs is The Mainstream... It's also ableist....it comes from the same root where wheelchair user kids are encouraged to be as ambulatory as possible or where blind/low vision kids are encouraged to use large print or books on tape As Much As Possible. We live in such a screwed up world that there are parents who GUSH that their child is in the mainstream, but they're still doing poorly or are in the lower level for academics...(did you know for example that a very particular family that is DEVOTED to a very specific and limited methodology that promises "on par" functioning, their dhh kids were in REMEDIAL English? Remedial English doesn't sound on par to me!) Mainstream functioning is good.....but so is specialized stuff!
 
deafdyke said:
One of the biggest mistakes that parents of kids with special needs (not just dhh) make is the assumption that all their kid needs is mainstream/ "normal" stuff, and they forget that SPECIALIZED stuff like schools/classes/camps etc may also be REALLY useful, even for kids who do well/appear to do well in the mainstream or who are mildly affected. .....It just seems like a lot of parents are afraid to explore more specialized resources......It's like they think if they do, their kid will not be "included" or it's thinking that admitting they need specialized stuff is actually ADMITTING their kid is "different" .....It is VERY VERY possible for kids to have that balance....and the overwhelming majority of kids DO have plenty of exposure to the mainstream....including kids who attend specialized schools, use specialized methodolgies etc etc etc.......Plopping a kid in the mainstream with little/no exposure to specialized stuff is IGNORING the fact that a kid could really benefit from those things......
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Wow this is very true. I am learning asl and deaf culture little by little and I have noticed things similar to this. I was helping a lady the other day at a retail store and I noticed she was hearing but her son was deaf and she kept talking to him slow so he can read her lips, so I asked her if he knew how to sign and when she said yes I started to sign the little bit that I know and his face just lit up with joy. I told her she should learn how to sign to communicate better with her child.
 
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