Is that question really offend you?

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Lasza

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I have a few question for you all. Happened to meet a guy last friday at Deaf Coffechat in Denver area. Somehow, I recognized new face. Thought I like to meet that guy. We introduced and chatted. Notice he's in very good taste in clothes that look like high class and foreginer to me. Not sure if he is deaf or hearing because of his sign language style (not strong ASL to me). So, why not i ask him a question. Asked him if he's deaf or hearing. End up, he doesnt like my question at all. ofc, he gave me his rotten attitude with his bluntly comment.

Is that question "Are you deaf or hearing?" offend you?


Have u expereince like this before?
 
Lasza,

No it does not Offended me.. I was asked if I was hearing.. When a deaf person sees me talking with my voice she came up to me asked me If I Was
hearing and I said no...

Sometimes A Person at the Mall will talk to me when I am not looking at him and he would say are u deaf??? And I said yes? why? That Person thought I was irgnoring him.. :lol:
 
nahh Lasza -- not offending to me -- if someone asked if i was deaf or hearie i would just laugh and say im deaf and :D

im surprised abt that guy's behavior at the deaf coffee chat nite u were at *smh*
 
Wow, That guy must had a bad hair day!.....

To be honest with you Lasza , I don't find it offend at all....

I do remember there were times, people would come up to me and asked me if I am deaf or hearing....I never find it offend of the way they question me about it.....

Like Cheri said ...Sometimes people question it for alot of reason such as hearing the person's voice , seeing their signs....and etc...

There are hearing people who signs so quickly than me :shock: but they are hearing not deaf....Darn, I should go to sign language class and learn to sign as quickly...... :lol:
 
^Angel^ said:
There are hearing people who signs so quickly than me :shock: but they are hearing not deaf....Darn, I should go to sign language class and learn to sign as quickly...... :lol:
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:rofl: yea i know what u mean Angel!!!!! ive talked to some hearies who sign so WELL and act so deaf and turned out theyre hearies -- answer usually is either CODA or a certified terp with a LONGGGGGG career in terping and/or is VERY involved in the Deaf community
 
I dont know. It depends on the context and the tone it is being asked.

I would feel strange, but not exactly offended but it would cause me to feel self-concicous and uncomfortable with THAT person if that person questions my deafness.

Most deafies I have met always thought I was teasing them about the fact that I am deaf. :wtf: This caused me to ponder what did I do to make them not believing that I am deaf? I didn't use my voice. I didn't "act" hearing (this is a whole other issue I have- How the hell could one act deaf ? :roll: Ignoring folks? that is the obvious sign of a deaf person???)

I hate it when people always question my deafness. they would think that either I grew up orally or became deaf at a late age of like 8 yr old et cetera. This is a tad offended since I grew up in deaf programs and mainstreamed at age 11 and am deaf since birth.

That is why I never bother asking people, just if they can talk or not .. then they would say, "No, i am deaf" or "Yeah i am HoH" etc.... then i would say, "Oh i just want to ask because I wonder if you can speak to that man to stop staring me but I will write it down to pass it on him if you dont want to use your voice.... " (it is only an EXAMPLE... I didn't use that line every time)

Another way to determine if person is hearing/deaf- ask if s/he grows up mainstreamed or institution... :D
 
Reminds me of something that I did in '92 in California.....

I met a hearie girl and her ASL was so good I mistook for her being a Deafie. Turned out she was working at the mental hospital with several Deafie patients there. That was how she did her ASL so damn good she could have passed for a Deafie.

Gawd, I miss that girl since I got my ass outa Califunny.
 
lasza it's not offending to me at all i would be flattered at all aspect. as for that dude its plby cuz he never experince deaf culture we do get asked those questions out of curiousity! no harm done in it !
 
Nah That's his problem. Perhaps, he doesn't understand what Deaf cultures.
No, it doesn't offended me.

Remmy---->http://www.alldeaf.com/showthread.php?t=7196

End up, he doesnt like my question at all. ofc, he gave me his rotten attitude with his bluntly comment.
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I'm wondering why he gave you his rotten attitude. Does he not want you think he is hearing??
 
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It doesn't offend me. A lot of people mistake me for either deaf or hearing. Sometimes, I'll be in line with my deaf friends at Taco Bell. We're signing to each other. When I get to the front, this guy starts gesturing like I'm deaf. I start speaking and he's shocked. Other times, I'll be talking to a hearing person. Suddenly, my friend comes along and I start signing to him. The hearing guy will ask me, "You know sign? I've never seen a hearing person sign so well!" I'd then tell him that I'm actually deaf, then he'd be shocked cuz I can talk. Heh!
 
it don't bother me. They want to know of us. Simple. :)
Maybe they are interest on you.
 
why ask him at all. when his back is turned, voice to him or have someone voice to him the you want to have sex with him right now. If he turns around you will know he is hearing
 
bbnt said:
why ask him at all. when his back is turned, voice to him or have someone voice to him the you want to have sex with him right now. If he turns around you will know he is hearing
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:rofl: bad bad bad Bbntie!...
 
bbnt said:
why ask him at all. when his back is turned, voice to him or have someone voice to him the you want to have sex with him right now. If he turns around you will know he is hearing
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:rofl: Oh myyyyy BBNT! Dang... Gotta behave.. (yeah right i know you wouldn't behave LOL)


Anyway..

Lasza,

very strange of this guy giving you a rotten attitude when you asked him that..

But I notice you said deaf coffeechat place in denver, wondering if that night they happen to have some students to meet deaf people and not to speak at all like these students learning etc. but Like Angel said that He might have had a bad bad bad hair day.. I am tryin' to figure out why would he act like that. If Someone asked me the question ~ I would say I am deaf sorry if you think I was hearing.. *IF* I was hearing, and I show up to learn communicate in real world I would say " I am hearing but I am not allow to use voices" something like that I have met few students at my local college that they did one night with all deaf people come in to meet these students to give a practices on how to communicate without voices..
Oh Psst, I have been asked few times "are you hearing" or " are you interpreter " I would say No. I am deaf. they would said " oh you speak good " some people think I Have larg..(spell) LOL Im like oh man.. hehe..


dang that guy must have had a bad hairday :)



Wendy
 
i would not feel offended at all
I'd feel flattered if some deafies
assumed I was hearing when
I was standing there acting very quiet
at a deaf bowling UNTIL
when I started using sign language (in ASL )
then they realize that I'm truly Deaf...
(Tee-hee)
 
maybe he feel offended because many people ask that question cuz of his ASL skills aren't good...

sometimes it offended me if someone says that i don't use my ASL good..

but it doesn't offend me when someone ask me if i'm deaf or hearing
 
I think if the question was about my skill of signing, I would be offended because I try to match the people's communication level so that both of us understand each other. If it was just a general question about me being hearing or Deaf, I'd answer it with no problems! ;)
 
I don't get easily offended by that question -- it'll only depend on the situation I'm in when asked that question in particular. :)
Most of the times, I don't really mind at all.
 
Well, it really depend on some people's attitude!

For example, I went to Deaf Cricket Match recently and spoken to a lady in Auslan, I must say she is brillant, but in my feelings, I can tell she is hearing, so I asked her "Are you hearing"? Her face fell down and asked me if her sign language is not good enough? Oh no, I wish I never asked this question to her, because I had trouble to convinced her that she is doing it very well but in my heart she don't take my words for it!! Also I tried hard to make it up telling her that her Auslan sign language is much better than my hubby! I hope I don't ruin her day!! She keeps asking me "What makes you think I am hearing"!!! please tell me!! etc

Because of it, I think it is nicer way to ask her "Are you deaf". it should make her feel happier ?????
 
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