Interesting thing happened at work.

[Daredevel7]

The disabilities office at my company referred someone to me regarding "enhancing lipreading skills". Apparently, this man in my company lost his hearing and wanted to learn how to lipread and the disabilities office regarded me as an "expert".

So this man emailed me and we met. He is about 50-55 years old, and he lost 90% of his hearing within 5 days last year.

We talked about being deaf, lipreading, our lives, and so on. After almost an hour and half of conversation, I had to smile. Even though this man knew a little bit of sign and is experienced with deaf people because he is heavily involved with Special Olympics, he had NO IDEA what it was like to be deaf or even HOH. Over the past year, he realized all the little and big things that frustrates us but seems to be "not a big deal" to hearing people. He felt so much better after talking to me because even though we don't come from the same background (I was born deaf), I do share the same experiences as him.

Honestly, I don't think I helped him much in terms of learning how to lipread or to "understand people better". However, I think he came out of that conversation less frustrated and more accepting of his hearing loss, even though nothing really changed.

I think there's a lot to be said for being with people who share your experiences.

Has anything like this happened to you?

 

[Jiro]

yea. several years ago, I was at my old high school on weekend, riding around. I came across this young mother with a deaf son - he looked about 5 years old or something. She stopped me cuz she saw my HA so she asked me a lot of questions. It was a long chit-chat. After the convo - she seems to be relieved.

 

[TWA]

The disabilities office at my company referred someone to me regarding "enhancing lipreading skills". Apparently, this man in my company lost his hearing and wanted to learn how to lipread and the disabilities office regarded me as an "expert".

So this man emailed me and we met. He is about 50-55 years old, and he lost 90% of his hearing within 5 days last year.

We talked about being deaf, lipreading, our lives, and so on. After almost an hour and half of conversation, I had to smile. Even though this man knew a little bit of sign and is experienced with deaf people because he is heavily involved with Special Olympics, he had NO IDEA what it was like to be deaf or even HOH. Over the past year, he realized all the little and big things that frustrates us but seems to be "not a big deal" to hearing people. He felt so much better after talking to me because even though we don't come from the same background (I was born deaf), I do share the same experiences as him.

Honestly, I don't think I helped him much in terms of learning how to lipread or to "understand people better". However, I think he came out of that conversation less frustrated and more accepting of his hearing loss, even though nothing really changed.

I think there's a lot to be said for being with people who share your experiences.

Has anything like this happened to you?

While I've never met anyone (IRL) who has only recently lost his/her hearing and are still adjusting to that, I know exactly what you mean when you say "there's something to be said for being with people who share your experiences."

I grew up without really knowing any other HoH/deaf people, except my twin brother, all the way until I was 28 years old. But I started learning sign language in summer of 2009. Later that fall, I started tutoring a deaf student. She taught me more sign language and I helped her improve her English, and from those tutoring sessions, we formed a friendship. We often would spend a lot of time just discussing life and our experiences, which were of course similar. The main thing we shared is that we were/are both attending a HUGE school where there are only a tiny amount of deaf people. We're very isolated here, but every time we met, it was like having a breath of fresh air after being stuck in a stuffy building all day. I would look forward to our tutoring sessions for days ahead of them. I still do.

My ASL has improved a hundredfold since then, and so has her English, but it was those first sessions, where we often struggled to communicate (she used to have to type our messages on her sidekick a lot. lol!) but still managed to share our experiences, that I look back on most fondly.

 

[BecLak]

I totally agree with you. So glad you were able to sit down and share and relate with him as it really is.

The disabilities office showed up their ignorance to think that lip-reading is the easy way out. Being very reliant on lipreading myself, and I have been doing it since I was young (born severely deaf). "Expert" as I may be now at the age of 47, it is just common sense if you know anything about language that it is impossible to pick up everything from just lipreading. What also puzzles me is why people are given a job in a position/field of work which they have no experience or qualifications, but because they wear the title, they are suddenly experts.

I am so glad that you were able to share with this man in the reality of his situation and that he knows there is someone nearby who understands him.

That's why I am thankful for AD. I never had that understanding and support until I joined AD.

 

[deafdyke]

Daredevil, are there any HLAA or ALDA chapters where you are?
He may really like those orgs. The experiance of "always being dhh" vs. being "ex hearing" IS different.

 

[LDNanna]

You were so cool just to converse with him. It does help so much.

 

[shel90]

I agree with LDNanna.

 

[Daredevel7]

I totally agree with you. So glad you were able to sit down and share and relate with him as it really is.

The disabilities office showed up their ignorance to think that lip-reading is the easy way out. Being very reliant on lipreading myself, and I have been doing it since I was young (born severely deaf). "Expert" as I may be now at the age of 47, it is just common sense if you know anything about language that it is impossible to pick up everything from just lipreading. What also puzzles me is why people are given a job in a position/field of work which they have no experience or qualifications, but because they wear the title, they are suddenly experts.

I should clarify that the role of the disabilities office is to offer support, not tell people what to do. This man actually requested a way to learn how to lipread better, so the disabilities office had nothing to provide for specifically that. The only thing they could think of is for him to talk to me.

My company is actually pretty good about providing accommodation services. We have interpreters for large meetings. They cannot do small meetings because we only have 2 deaf people who know ASL (including me) in the whole company and it's just too much $$$$.

I just felt the need to defend the disabilities office in my company. They've been really wonderful.

 

[jillio]

I should clarify that the role of the disabilities office is to offer support, not tell people what to do. This man actually requested a way to learn how to lipread better, so the disabilities office had nothing to provide for specifically that. The only thing they could think of is for him to talk to me.

My company is actually pretty good about providing accommodation services. We have interpreters for large meetings. They cannot do small meetings because we only have 2 deaf people who know ASL (including me) in the whole company and it's just too much $$$$.

I just felt the need to defend the disabilities office in my company. They've been really wonderful.

Agreed. At least they took action in the only way they knew, rather than completely ignoring his request.

 

[deafgal001]

I should clarify that the role of the disabilities office is to offer support, not tell people what to do. This man actually requested a way to learn how to lipread better, so the disabilities office had nothing to provide for specifically that. The only thing they could think of is for him to talk to me.

My company is actually pretty good about providing accommodation services. We have interpreters for large meetings. They cannot do small meetings because we only have 2 deaf people who know ASL (including me) in the whole company and it's just too much $$$$.

I just felt the need to defend the disabilities office in my company. They've been really wonderful.

It sounds like they are wonderful. They knew he needed support. I just hope they knew you were comfortable giving him that type of support (that is, ask your permission for him to contact you).

My closest experience was with a guy in one of my college classes. He is late-deafened. He couldn't really understand me that well because My lips weren't all that readable compare to hearing people. But I could understand him ok with my hearing aids (back before I had CI). He was very depressed and told me every frustration he had about life. I told him I could relate. anyway, he dropped out that class and so did I (the teacher was from Russia and wasn't very fluent in English and it made it very difficult for both of us to learn from that class) and that was the last I saw him.

 

[posts from hell]

I should clarify that the role of the disabilities office is to offer support, not tell people what to do. This man actually requested a way to learn how to lipread better, so the disabilities office had nothing to provide for specifically that. The only thing they could think of is for him to talk to me.

My company is actually pretty good about providing accommodation services. We have interpreters for large meetings. They cannot do small meetings because we only have 2 deaf people who know ASL (including me) in the whole company and it's just too much $$$$.

I just felt the need to defend the disabilities office in my company. They've been really wonderful.

$$$ = BS. It's a write off. They will get that $ back at the end of the year. Now time for me to find that code... I'll post it on a website and have you guys refer to it. Won't be up for a few months tho.

I'll share it with you when I get it.

 

[Reba]

...My company is actually pretty good about providing accommodation services. We have interpreters for large meetings. They cannot do small meetings because we only have 2 deaf people who know ASL (including me) in the whole company and it's just too much $$$$....

Interesting. I've interpreted for small businesses with only one deaf employee. That included small meetings, large meetings, and all-day training.

I assume that your company isn't small or else they wouldn't be holding large meetings.

When they don't provide a terp for your small meetings, what do you do for communication?

 

[Reba]

The disabilities office at my company referred someone to me regarding "enhancing lipreading skills". Apparently, this man in my company lost his hearing and wanted to learn how to lipread and the disabilities office regarded me as an "expert".

So this man emailed me and we met. He is about 50-55 years old, and he lost 90% of his hearing within 5 days last year.

We talked about being deaf, lipreading, our lives, and so on. After almost an hour and half of conversation, I had to smile. Even though this man knew a little bit of sign and is experienced with deaf people because he is heavily involved with Special Olympics, he had NO IDEA what it was like to be deaf or even HOH. Over the past year, he realized all the little and big things that frustrates us but seems to be "not a big deal" to hearing people. He felt so much better after talking to me because even though we don't come from the same background (I was born deaf), I do share the same experiences as him.

Honestly, I don't think I helped him much in terms of learning how to lipread or to "understand people better". However, I think he came out of that conversation less frustrated and more accepting of his hearing loss, even though nothing really changed.

I think there's a lot to be said for being with people who share your experiences.

Has anything like this happened to you?

for sharing your positive experience.

 

[rockdrummer]

The disabilities office at my company referred someone to me regarding "enhancing lipreading skills". Apparently, this man in my company lost his hearing and wanted to learn how to lipread and the disabilities office regarded me as an "expert".

So this man emailed me and we met. He is about 50-55 years old, and he lost 90% of his hearing within 5 days last year.

We talked about being deaf, lipreading, our lives, and so on. After almost an hour and half of conversation, I had to smile. Even though this man knew a little bit of sign and is experienced with deaf people because he is heavily involved with Special Olympics, he had NO IDEA what it was like to be deaf or even HOH. Over the past year, he realized all the little and big things that frustrates us but seems to be "not a big deal" to hearing people. He felt so much better after talking to me because even though we don't come from the same background (I was born deaf), I do share the same experiences as him.

Honestly, I don't think I helped him much in terms of learning how to lipread or to "understand people better". However, I think he came out of that conversation less frustrated and more accepting of his hearing loss, even though nothing really changed.

I think there's a lot to be said for being with people who share your experiences.

Has anything like this happened to you?

you are a good person!

 

[Hohtopics]

The disabilities office at my company referred someone to me regarding "enhancing lipreading skills". Apparently, this man in my company lost his hearing and wanted to learn how to lipread and the disabilities office regarded me as an "expert".

So this man emailed me and we met. He is about 50-55 years old, and he lost 90% of his hearing within 5 days last year.

We talked about being deaf, lipreading, our lives, and so on. After almost an hour and half of conversation, I had to smile. Even though this man knew a little bit of sign and is experienced with deaf people because he is heavily involved with Special Olympics, he had NO IDEA what it was like to be deaf or even HOH. Over the past year, he realized all the little and big things that frustrates us but seems to be "not a big deal" to hearing people. He felt so much better after talking to me because even though we don't come from the same background (I was born deaf), I do share the same experiences as him.

Honestly, I don't think I helped him much in terms of learning how to lipread or to "understand people better". However, I think he came out of that conversation less frustrated and more accepting of his hearing loss, even though nothing really changed.

I think there's a lot to be said for being with people who share your experiences.

Has anything like this happened to you?

Daredevil,

How much of an hearing loss does he have? Cause if it's profound, he may be a candidate. I've often hear of late deafened people be very grateful of the CI, cause it kinda helps them to a little closer to what they were prior to their hearing loss.

 

[Hohtopics]

Daredevil, are there any HLAA or ALDA chapters where you are?
He may really like those orgs. The experiance of "always being dhh" vs. being "ex hearing" IS different.

Yes, those organizations tend to be populated among the hard of hearing or late deafened. I've been to some of them.

 

[Jiro]

Interesting. I've interpreted for small businesses with only one deaf employee. That included small meetings, large meetings, and all-day training.

I assume that your company isn't small or else they wouldn't be holding large meetings.

When they don't provide a terp for your small meetings, what do you do for communication?

Daredevil is not fluent in ASL

 

[deafgal001]

Daredevil is not fluent in ASL

I believe Reba was responsing to this:

My company is actually pretty good about providing accommodation services. We have interpreters for large meetings. They cannot do small meetings because we only have 2 deaf people who know ASL (including me) in the whole company and it's just too much $$$$.

 

[Daredevel7]

Interesting. I've interpreted for small businesses with only one deaf employee. That included small meetings, large meetings, and all-day training.

I assume that your company isn't small or else they wouldn't be holding large meetings.

When they don't provide a terp for your small meetings, what do you do for communication?

You are correct that my company isn't small. Jiro is correct that I am not fluent in ASL. I can understand most of it, but mostly for conversation means. My meetings usually are VERY technical and I probably wouldn't understand ASL that is very technical.

For me, meetings with 5 or more people can be a problem. However, most of the time, people know about me, and if they request information from me, they ask me directly. Or my coworkers help me out, one even mouths the important parts to me. Also, almost all meetings have presentations (powerpoint slides). So with all of that, I get by.

Oh, also, I lipread relatively well, if you didn't know.

 

[Reba]

You are correct that my company isn't small. Jiro is correct that I am not fluent in ASL. I can understand most of it, but mostly for conversation means. My meetings usually are VERY technical and I probably wouldn't understand ASL that is very technical.

For me, meetings with 5 or more people can be a problem. However, most of the time, people know about me, and if they request information from me, they ask me directly. Or my coworkers help me out, one even mouths the important parts to me. Also, almost all meetings have presentations (powerpoint slides). So with all of that, I get by.

Oh, also, I lipread relatively well, if you didn't know.

If you lipread well, would you prefer to use an oral transliterator/facilitator for the small meetings?