How can I teach hearing people to respect me?

[dkf747]

Some jobs you can do as suggested by everyone above. However, how about jobs where you have no choice but to deal with these people. Telling his boss he can't work with people like that would possibly get him fire or demoted, because he can't do the job required. What about a situation like that?

 

[SJCSue]

:topic: Sometimes, my OCD does make it worse for me. I try to ignore the thoughts, which can be very hard to do!

I forgot to mention especially when the non-food (cleaner, bug spray, mouth wash etc.) is place in the bag with the food items (cookies, cereal, crackers etc.) :Ohno:

 

[GalaxyAngel]

Depends customer have no patience communcation w/Deaf people or regluar trying to communcation w/other non-customer. Both are still same results no difference..

By the way, their loss!

 

[zookeeper4321]

In my experience customers can be an ass no matter what your like or they are like. As to hearies unless they know a deaf person themselves they will never get it. I was never prejudice but I understood a lot more when I made my first deaf friend. Now that I have a deaf son and a HOH bf I learn more every day. Just know that if they have attitude and you don't, you are the better person.

 

[pek1]

1. Well, aren't we just a ray of @#$%-ing sunshine?

2. Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we?

3. Don't bother me. I'm living happily ever after.

4. Do I look like a @#$%-ing people person?

5. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

6. I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.

7. You! Off my planet!!

8. Therapy is expensive, popping bubble wrap is cheap! You choose.

9. Practice random acts of intelligence & senseless acts of self-control.

10. I like cats too. Let's exchange recipes.

11. Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?

12. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

13. Let me show you how the guards used to do it.

14. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?

15. I'm not crazy, I've just been in a very bad mood for 30 years.

16. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

17. Do they ever shut up on your planet?

18. I'm just working here till a good fast-food job opens up.

19. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

20. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

21. Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.

22. I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one.

23. How many times do I have to flush before you go away?

24. I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?

25. I work 40 hours a week to be this poor.

26. Can I trade this job for what's behind door number 2?

27. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

28. Just smile and say "Yes, Mistress."

29. Chaos, panic, and disorder - my work here is done.

30. Earth is full. Go home.

31. Is it time for your medication or mine?

32. Aw, did I step on your poor little bitty ego?

33. I plead contemporary insanity.

34. How do I set a laser printer to stun?

35. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.

36. When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.

37. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of @#$%.

40. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a @#$%.

41. How about "never"? Is "never" good for you?

42. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.

43. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

44. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

45. I'm already visualising the duct tape over your mouth.

46. Are you coming on to me or having a seizure?

47. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.



hope this helps,
though i know there tons of difficult people out there i barely cope too, hell im starting to get around this one, we'd never know what goes on in other people's minds, they must be having miserable times too, sometimes humour does it

I nearly fell over laughing over this one, sure wish I could say that sometimes!!

 

[Grummer]

Some jobs you can do as suggested by everyone above. However, how about jobs where you have no choice but to deal with these people. Telling his boss he can't work with people like that would possibly get him fire or demoted, because he can't do the job required. What about a situation like that?

sure, its not acceptable, even when its' widespread, and surely i can not say it would change over night, blunt sexism has whithered away, thought it still exist but not as much as so in workplaces, it is more subtle and risky for laws Has changed. The film "north country' was a true story that took place in 1972 which was a loong time ago in a time where it is NORMAL for women to take the shyte from men anywhere and especially in workplaces. In that 'story" north country - this women reasoned that she just want to go on with work and do the job without fear or being abused doing their jobs.
this is to say, if we start small (like they did, (well (the films woemn wasint in not a small firm, but big enought to rattle them and spread the revolution)
it would create a trend, and the future would have avery different , much safer , easier place for all deaf people (regardless of where in contiuuum or how deaf/hard of hearing you are, same basic discrimination, plight we receive are all nearly the same)
Sure it might not be right to start it where you work for now, but it has to start from somewhere. Everything takes time, nothing happens in a bang.

Depends customer have no patience communcation w/Deaf people or regluar trying to communcation w/other non-customer. Both are still same results no difference..

sure, thats true, but i dont buy it, even NOW, men still are impaitent or regard women as less, but they're a lot more careful now.....we could expect the similar tranformation in how customers approachs ANY places with more caution because of 'education' as in the changing equiette has demand emphasis to clarity in communication is in the level as respect.

 

[TigerOkieGal]

oh *chuckles* boy! I laugh read whole thing gosh I need it that

1. Well, aren't we just a ray of @#$%-ing sunshine?

2. Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we?

3. Don't bother me. I'm living happily ever after.

4. Do I look like a @#$%-ing people person?

5. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

6. I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.

7. You! Off my planet!!

8. Therapy is expensive, popping bubble wrap is cheap! You choose.

9. Practice random acts of intelligence & senseless acts of self-control.

10. I like cats too. Let's exchange recipes.

11. Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?

12. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

13. Let me show you how the guards used to do it.

14. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?

15. I'm not crazy, I've just been in a very bad mood for 30 years.

16. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

17. Do they ever shut up on your planet?

18. I'm just working here till a good fast-food job opens up.

19. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

20. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

21. Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.

22. I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one.

23. How many times do I have to flush before you go away?

24. I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?

25. I work 40 hours a week to be this poor.

26. Can I trade this job for what's behind door number 2?

27. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

28. Just smile and say "Yes, Mistress."

29. Chaos, panic, and disorder - my work here is done.

30. Earth is full. Go home.

31. Is it time for your medication or mine?

32. Aw, did I step on your poor little bitty ego?

33. I plead contemporary insanity.

34. How do I set a laser printer to stun?

35. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.

36. When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.

37. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of @#$%.

40. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a @#$%.

41. How about "never"? Is "never" good for you?

42. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.

43. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

44. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

45. I'm already visualising the duct tape over your mouth.

46. Are you coming on to me or having a seizure?

47. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.



hope this helps,
though i know there tons of difficult people out there i barely cope too, hell im starting to get around this one, we'd never know what goes on in other people's minds, they must be having miserable times too, sometimes humour does it

 

[Fo'Shizzle]

You DON'T teach hearing people to respect you... They have to respect YOU for who you are... If they don't then thats their problem and they weren't a friend of yours in the first place. P E R I O D!


But I can suggest you this, Be YOURSELF and enjoy life, friends will come to you or you can talk to more ppl more often and eventually you will find friends...



BTW at work I can tell you this people are pain in the asses BUT not all people are like that, there are most ppl are willing to work with HOH and deafies... Just take your time and ingore those who is rude, don't let them ruin your day... You will find them all over in this world, BUT there are TONS of nice people who helps and don't care about HOH/Deafies... Just think postive!

 

[Malfoyish]

Respect is earned, not taught, or demanded of someone.

Part of the problem is awareness. When one does not understand where you are coming from, it's hard for them show another the respect they deserve. I fully believe this, but also see that today's society has gotten to the point where more and more people are seen practicing consideration for others and are becoming more respectful towards the needs of the deaf as well as any other person, disabled or not.

 

[Your Mom]

Watch the movie office space and realize, it could be worse. ; o)

I echo most everyones thoughts some people are just stubborn and rude, and no matter what you say or do they will insist on constantly being narrow minded and nit witted.

To be the devils advocate, sometimes people are rude and disrespectful and really dont intend to be or do such. Being confused or frustrated can often come off as being disrespectfull. Never the less, its not an excuse.

 

[Grummer]

ha, right, people dont respect like " they like you or want to please you", if say a LAW change to demand certain BEHAVIOURS, then like hell they'd respect the LAW.
People dont want to get done in, prosecuted or the likes, just the same there is law for thefts or murders. If they wasnt laws for protection against that , then ofc people gonna want to steal or murder from you !

My arguement is, if we can place a law that rules out grounds for certain behaviour deemed as inappropriate and that can impair communication across the aural, lingual,'deaf-ral' capacity then, why the hell not start protecting deaf people from 'so called subtle communication' abuse from the hearing people !

That will force hearing people think Twice about insulting or sabotarging the chain of commands or taskes in which deaf people are obliged to perform in the workplaces.
This would mean the days of 'unreliable' deaf employees would be cease if not completely eradicated. Since it could be largely controlled by law, we can assure we would have alot more happier deaf people (in workplaces and public) since the stress of working or being in the hearing world has been addressed.

 

[Grummer]

To be the devils advocate, sometimes people are rude and disrespectful and really dont intend to be or do such. Being confused or frustrated can often come off as being disrespectfull. Never the less, its not an excuse.

yeah pretty much so, but still with the changing social-control and at the rate of systematic clamps on what is not appropriate / inappropriate being carried out with heavy weights in form of Politically correct schemas , why the hell not, we do the same , just to keep the offensive offically in the eyes of the law, not as a happenstate they hearies gets away with it (even as little or 'harmless' it maybe' ) right now a vast amount of long-gone sexist remarks is now considered as an invitation to be sued on ground of discrimination or harrassment. Now we can do this in the terms of disability or rather in purest form, as within a refined definition of ' deafness or hearing impaired' whether under or not the 'umbrella' of the disability-governing body such as your ADA of America (im not from USA)

get my drift ? WE DO NOT HAVE TO PUT WITH IT !!!!!!!!!!

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Sometimes, there's nothing you can do because others are just too damn stubborn to respect you.

Perhaps, some patience might help. Don't give up. Move on.

Yes I´m agree with you on this.

 

[Grummer]

for anyone who 'agrees that you can't do anyhing about it' are just as naive as the women were before this brave lady in the iron mine in 'north country' stood up, it take courage, not just that, but also alot of convincing , that is winning minds, to stand up and stay, "enough, we HAVE been trodden on, and its not right, we will want this to be included in Law, You have to admit it, its ugly for us Deaf/deaf, hearing impaired people to put up with this shit. and we dont need to put up with it.

For this, once in Law, hearing people, regardless of their attitudes, personality, or personal situations, they wont dare mess around with Deaf people.
Of course it will be difficult to do, as well as there's possibility of frivilious claims to 'win awards settlements'., nevertheless it is still valid, very valid and VERY DO-able. Even if deaf people starts to abuse it, for a time it will settle and the court systems, abroad will quickly pick it up, and make/add admendments to clauses and so forth. This is consider normal practice for 'new concepts or newly-recognised crimes, (software piracy is one such obvious example of this). I t can't be 'abused' widely as many MIGHT think, after all many will get caught, just as one particular lady abused the law regarding wheelchair access, and conning her way in courts winning and swining the awards, she got caught. so there.

Why did I went the extra distance to bring this up?
becuase obvisouly, many of youse 'disagrees' or refuse to believe the plausibility of this civil action to push for the change, we can take, only becuase of the ' so many factors' that can be deemed as 'mixed messsages' or ''feeling left out" , but so what really, the main point is to be maintained, that is, it iS STILL NOT appropriate for a deaf person to be feeling left out of meetings (whether with interpreters or NOT - beside intepreters are a right rip off, it is often NOT possible for deaf employees to pay their own way for terps, or the companys) the feeling of being left out, (that is which a genuine situations (like not pub conversations with strangers thats' TOTALLY different!) takes place that IS an base for evidence! , and so, get the picture?!

It is doable. Come on!, start we all should really thinking about what it Means as Deaf Rights.

 

[Liza]

Sue - the most important thing is to respect yourself! Be the better person! I know it's a pain in the ass... but we need to be shining examples in a world of darkness and ignorance, when action speaks louder than words. Who else will help us but ourselves?

 

[kcrocker]

Just ingore those people.. My deaf friend works at Wal-Mart.. She has to deal with some rudest people. She tells me all the time. The most recent story of hers happened yesterday. This one got me laffing my butt off. I'll share this quick short story. She did walked back to her job site after lunch break. She did her own business like always. This man tried to call her over for help. She did not hear it which ,of course, she can't. He actually went up to the cashier and slammed his fist on the cashier and bawled her out about how rude this worker was and started to spew She is friggin' deaf he ever encounter. While he was spewing some ugly names, Cashier calmly told this man, "Fortunely for you, She is deaf". That man shutted the crap up and stared at the floor and his face turned into beet red. So cashier went off to tell this deaf worker to let her know what was going on. She laughed about it and say there is nothign I can do about it if I cannot hear him calling me. Oh well.. But she did actually went up to the door and waited for this man to come out. She did come to him and say " I am very sorry that I did not hear you call me as you can see that I am deaf." This man just stammered and told her that it was not her fault and he will keep that in his mind that he will make every effort to see if that person is deaf or not by calling out. He ran out. She just smiled and went back to work.
So SJCSue, I hope this will help you feel better as you are not the only one who have to deal with it. So VampProX, Pek1, Sillycat, Grummer, etc. is pretty much right. There is no solution to this. My son do have OCD too. I can pretty much understand how you feel about it.. Try to think of better times other than this person. Keep your head high up and go on with your own business. Just tell yourself that you are better person with better attitude than rude customer. They are no better than you are...

 

[Grummer]

a very nice story about jcrockers' friend, but in reality that's an indication of positive discrimination, which still can't be used to justify theres not such thing as harrassment , negative or positive, intended or not, it is still a violation on the account of acknowledging deaf people status of equality, or rather it should be equity., Very thought provocative story though, really is. In fact, i really liked the story, its nice, really a 'gentle triumph but its not a 'true' triumph. the Mans must felt guilt which is 'good' on his part, still he blurted out irresponsibly accussing and down-putting of deaf people as a 'slip of tongues' on what is repeated , up held, passed on thruought jokes, dirty jokes, folklores, ideology, popular culture and so on. it's really no excuse, and it really at end of the day deaf people ARE still frowned on, looked down to, taken out on, and all that, its not acceptable.

but yeah , Cheers

 

[operatorally]

The trouble with this question is that it involves the workplace; because you can't resist or defend yourself, let alone tell these people off, when you're at work as you normally would. Though I'm a 'hearie' I've worked in places where I've been discriminated against by customers because I'm a lesbian. Normally, on the street, I would fight back at abusive comments with a rude comment of my own, but at work I had to smile and take it or know I was going to get fired. In one of my later jobs though, my boss was cool and if I didn't want to serve someone homophobic I could tell them that someone else would serve them because I didnt want to deal with them. Would you be permitted to say, ''I'm sorry I don't deal with customers who mistreat me for being deaf?'' The problem with the service industry is that we are all trained to put up with abuse... people think they can take anything out on us or that we exist you absorb the grumpy sum of a bad day...

 

[diehardbiker]

It does not matter who, hearing or deaf. no difference, I do get both kinds of customer calling us. Some are darn friendly, and others, ahem, they need to cool themselves down cause I can't help them if they lose their head. My 2nd job really helps me making myself more calm, knowing that I can not control anything, thus don't let them push my button! I have to guard my button with bullet proof vest! Yes, I get screaming customers wanna this and that. I can't do everything. All VP can do is try to get somebody's VP up and running that is it. Even though I am deaf myself, I can understand how frustrated they feel, I would be damn frustrated if my VP isn't up and running. No way I can live without VP!

The best thing you can do is just accept the things you can not change which is other people's attitudes!

This is a huge issue at work for me. There are some customers do not respect me for the plain fact that I am hard of hearing. I am nice and very repsectful to these people. I try very hard to speak very clearly so everyone can understand my speech. There are some people who will not take the time to understand me. They just ignore me! These people are only a tiny percentage of my "customers". What should I do?

 

[diehardbiker]

Been there, very similiar, I am being trained to take all the shits from customers. Even brainless customers as well (Excuse me for the puns). After starting my 2nd job, I realize how much these VRS, TRS, any kind of telephone operators, including customer service have to endure. I start to respect them, and I ended up getting better result from that!
Nobody can win everything, grin

The trouble with this question is that it involves the workplace; because you can't resist or defend yourself, let alone tell these people off, when you're at work as you normally would. Though I'm a 'hearie' I've worked in places where I've been discriminated against by customers because I'm a lesbian. Normally, on the street, I would fight back at abusive comments with a rude comment of my own, but at work I had to smile and take it or know I was going to get fired. In one of my later jobs though, my boss was cool and if I didn't want to serve someone homophobic I could tell them that someone else would serve them because I didnt want to deal with them. Would you be permitted to say, ''I'm sorry I don't deal with customers who mistreat me for being deaf?'' The problem with the service industry is that we are all trained to put up with abuse... people think they can take anything out on us or that we exist you absorb the grumpy sum of a bad day...