Highlighting Deafness in One's Achievements

[Daredevel7]

This is a spinoff from another thread. (Thanks to DeafCaroline for the title!)

Some people don't like the fact that their deafness are pointed out when stating their achievements.

Example:
"She made the honor roll, despite her deafness."

On one hand, it can be perceived that being deaf is a negative thing and/or something one has to overcome. As DeafCaroline said in the other thread: "Well, my view is that we can't demand to be treated as equals then feel compelled to throw in the deaf word whenever we list our successes as if despite this great disability, we succeeded anyway and that makes us "special". Deafness is not the disability here, it's people's attitudes."

On the other hand, because of the people's attitudes towards deafness, deaf people are at a disadvantage. They have to overcome and break barriers of this negative attitude towards deaf people.

I say that it can be a good thing to highlight their deafness in their accomplishments. If you kept telling people that a deaf person did this and that, eventually, they will stop reacting with such shock and awe and resort to "So what if they are deaf?", implying that they now see deaf people as equals.

What say you?? Is pointing out their deafness in their accomplishments a good thing or a bad thing? And why?

 

[rockin'robin]

Not too sure about "pointing it out!"....but making a subtle note of it, I believe it fine, as long as it doesn't offend the person....But, all in all, highlighting a deafie's achievements, making it known to the hearies, can and should be a good thing!...The more deafies are exposed, the more hearies will realize that deafies can do whatever is set before them, except to hear.

I do get sick and tired of hearies saying.."Oh, she's deaf...let her in the front of the line"...or giving me "special" priviledges. I like to feel equal, not inferior, and I make that known very much.

There was this hearing Lady, not too long ago, that was grilling on her BBQ grill, and the flames were touching the tree limbs....we're not allowed to grill outside where we live (rules)...so I reported it.....and she got mad and said..."you reported it because I am disabled!"....(she was in her 50's, and I do not know her disability, but know that she was NOT deaf and not in a wheelchair)....I laughed and told her..."you are disabled?....well, I'm deaf....but not disabled"...She shut up right then!

 

[DeafCaroline]

I do get sick and tired of hearies saying.."Oh, she's deaf...let her in the front of the line"...or giving me "special" priviledges. I like to feel equal, not inferior, and I make that known very much.

I had a huge argument with someone 2 years ago about this. I was talking about difficult it can be to live as a deaf person in a hearing world and how I would like it if hearing people didn't make an issue of my deafness as if it had any bearing on my intelligence or abilities.

Then I said "I mean, look, I raised two kids by myself since the age of 20 despite being deaf."

And my friend said "you can't expect people to treat you like an equal if you feel compelled to point out your deafness as though it had any bearing on your intelligence and abilities. No one will ever see you as just Caroline if you insert the deaf word when talking about your achievements, they will just see you as that deaf woman who is so special because she managed to do well despite her "disability". You want people to see you as Caroline, not "that deaf girl"? - then cut that out."

he shut me up!

 

[Bottesini]

Of course when you call yourself "Deaf........" as many people do, it makes it a little laughable that you object to your deafness being noticed.

However, I do wish I had thought to call myself "DeafSmurf" when joining here...

 

[BecLak]

Wirelessly posted

I think our being Deaf should be stated as a fact rather than an excuse. Such as in: 'I am an Australian' then show your achievements or go about just simply being an equal person without sabotaging everything with excuses,'sorrys' or 'despite ofs' or attempts of covering up what you can't do. Every human being has things they can't do, but the ones who get appraised are the ones who focus on what they can do.

 

[deafdyke]

I think it depends. Stupid stuff like making the honor roll or raising a family or playing sports or any countless number of average everyday things, its dumb to highlight the acheivements....but stuff like winning a marathon or being an inventor or writer no.

 

[BecLak]

I think it depends. Stupid stuff like making the honor roll or raising a family or playing sports or any countless number of average everyday things, its dumb to highlight the acheivements....but stuff like winning a marathon or being an inventor or writer no.

That is exactly right! To be seen as equal, we must be equal. But that doesn't mean as a woman I have to become like a man to be given equality. No human being is the same, every living being is a masterpiece, an original, yet every human being has a right to be treated with respect and equality.

 

[BecLak]

I know for myself, it has been a learning experience since being here on AD - in being true to myself and finding my identity as a Deaf person. For years, I had been told by society how I should be, told I had to accomodate to 'fit in'. I was doing all the "work" and getting shortchanged. However, now I have come to realise over these past 2 years that I can swing it around and make the accomodations to suit both me and the other person I am interacting with, therefore equalizing every situation I find myself in. Many of us have been so subjugated to inferiority by society throughout our lives that we end up out of habit doing it to ourselves. We need to break out of that mold society has set and not 'demand' but 'command' , not 'plead' but 'expect' respect and equality.

 

[whatdidyousay!]

Not too sure about "pointing it out!"....but making a subtle note of it, I believe it fine, as long as it doesn't offend the person....But, all in all, highlighting a deafie's achievements, making it known to the hearies, can and should be a good thing!...The more deafies are exposed, the more hearies will realize that deafies can do whatever is set before them, except to hear.

I do get sick and tired of hearies saying.."Oh, she's deaf...let her in the front of the line"...or giving me "special" priviledges. I like to feel equal, not inferior, and I make that known very much.

There was this hearing Lady, not too long ago, that was grilling on her BBQ grill, and the flames were touching the tree limbs....we're not allowed to grill outside where we live (rules)...so I reported it.....and she got mad and said..."you reported it because I am disabled!"....(she was in her 50's, and I do not know her disability, but know that she was NOT deaf and not in a wheelchair)....I laughed and told her..."you are disabled?....well, I'm deaf....but not disabled"...She shut up right then!

When I went to town meetings and was allowed to sit where I could see people faces better to read their lips I did not feel like I was getting special treatment! I felt that finally people get it I need to sit up front instead missing what a person is saying because they are sitting behind me! The only way you can feel inferior is if allowed people to made you feel that way. If you where a child people can made you feel inferior . I really do not care what people think about me anymore, I passed that a long time ago.
What give you the rights to say a person it not disabled! You had no idea what was wrong with her. I know a woman that has a handicap parking sticker and just by looking at her you can't see anything wrong with her,
does that mean she not disabled because she looks OK!! I met a vet that was exposed agent orange and he has blackout spells , you could never tell by looking at him. He has dog to warn him when he is going pass out.

 

[sarahkhan]

Hmm..I thought lot about this. Well, sometime acknowledged the achievement despite being a deaf can be a good thing,as it can spread the message that deaf people can do anything except hear. Like hearing has nothing to do with intelligent or activities.

But what I dislike is that people tend to give credit on their part rather than on the person who got the achievement. When I got good results on O level, my parents told their friend that it was for THIER hard works that I got good grades,but not a slight mention that I did it with MY hard work too. They did the same thing for my other siblings too, but not the"pointed out the effort"as it was in my case. It was more obvious that it was because of my deafness.I really do appreciate their hard work( like giving me a pair of hearing aids) but please, dont tell it to them too often just because I am deaf. Because it will give them idea that I need helps from others because I am deaf. Deaf people can do anything anything except hear.I did not say anything about this to them, because their friends was present and I dont want to hurt them. But later when it became just a big deal to me, and I could not hold any longer because they were not acknowledging my hard work, I told them about this politely and they finally understood.

So it depend upon what kind of situation the person is. If a person insist me that a deaf person cannot do a certain things because of their"disability", then I will say "really? I did that certain things despite being deaf"

About sitting at the front line, I actually dont have any problem with that. If my school does not provide any accomodation for me, then I WILL sit on the front line. I am no like a hearing people that I can understand everthing if I sit back.

 

[rockin'robin]

When I went to town meetings and was allowed to sit where I could see people faces better to read their lips I did not feel like I was getting special treatment! I felt that finally people get it I need to sit up front instead missing what a person is saying because they are sitting behind me! The only way you can feel inferior is if allowed people to made you feel that way. If you where a child people can made you feel inferior . I really do not care what people think about me anymore, I passed that a long time ago.
What give you the rights to say a person it not disabled! You had no idea what was wrong with her. I know a woman that has a handicap parking sticker and just by looking at her you can't see anything wrong with her,
does that mean she not disabled because she looks OK!! I met a vet that was exposed agent orange and he has blackout spells , you could never tell by looking at him. He has dog to warn him when he is going pass out.

If you can "sit in front and lipread "everything" that is being said, then more power to you...I'm profound deaf and a very good lipreader, but I actually can only catch about 60-80% of what is being said....Nothing wrong with requesting an intrepretor!....

And I did not say that "she was not disabled"....she told me she was, and SHE said the only reason I reported her was "because she was disabled"....And FYI, the only reason she said that, was because she was DRUNK....she was always DRUNK....even walking into people's homes without "knocking" first....and she even told one of my sons one day..."that she felt sorry for him because I was hearing-impaired."......

So, now, you see the history!...And she was BBQ'ing outside, hence the rules where I live do not allow open BBQ's, because of the fire hazard....She had done it more than once....and a person, who claims to be Disabled, who is drunk, and BBQ'ing outside where the fire is leaping and touching the tree limbs is a very dangerous thing....

So, she was "using" the term of "Disabled" to get by the rules and breaking them at all times....She could walk, talk, hear, see....her only problem was ALCOHOL.....and perhaps being diagnosed as "mentally disturbed"....and using the "Disabled" label.

She was evicted....not because of my complaint....(which was the last complaint of about a hundred complaints)!.....And I would do it again if necessary.

 

[ash345]

I agree... I do not like it being pointed out how I did something "despite" being Deaf. I graduated from high school in the top 10% of my class... and all the school gave me was a note taker... I graduated from college in 3 years with a 3.65 GPA... I love when people tell me wow you did really well... but I HATE it when they say... "even though you are deaf"... No... there is no "EVEN THOUGH" I did it because I had to work hard, I did it because I can... yes I had to work harder than my hearing counterparts... but I did it...

My grandparents tell my parents on a regular basis that they did really well with me, because of all I have accomplished... then they say "being Oral must have done that for her" I wish I could tell them, no I had to work harder than anyone else... it was not because I was oral... maybe if I had been given instruction in the language that should have been mine from the time my family found out I was deaf, I would have done better. The rest of my family is "oral" too... but they aren't d/Deaf... so is them being "oral" the cause of their success and failures too? NO... and it isn't my parents that should have been getting all the priase for what I have accomplished, it should be ME... I am the one who did the work... if it was them, wouldn't you think that all 5 of my sisters would have accomplished the same? No... 3 of my sisters didn't even graduate high school... only one of them got her GED... and only one other sister has graduated from college... so is it my parents, or is it me? I think it is ME... and its not "despite the fact i am Deaf..." nor is it "because I am Deaf..." it is because it is ME. I do not take no for an answer...

 

[jillio]

Not too sure about "pointing it out!"....but making a subtle note of it, I believe it fine, as long as it doesn't offend the person....But, all in all, highlighting a deafie's achievements, making it known to the hearies, can and should be a good thing!...The more deafies are exposed, the more hearies will realize that deafies can do whatever is set before them, except to hear.

I do get sick and tired of hearies saying.."Oh, she's deaf...let her in the front of the line"...or giving me "special" priviledges. I like to feel equal, not inferior, and I make that known very much.

There was this hearing Lady, not too long ago, that was grilling on her BBQ grill, and the flames were touching the tree limbs....we're not allowed to grill outside where we live (rules)...so I reported it.....and she got mad and said..."you reported it because I am disabled!"....(she was in her 50's, and I do not know her disability, but know that she was NOT deaf and not in a wheelchair)....I laughed and told her..."you are disabled?....well, I'm deaf....but not disabled"...She shut up right then!

There you go. I don't see a problem with making a mention of it as in "and she happens to be deaf". But to mention it in the context of "despite her deafness" is making the disabled factor jump to the forefront and it actually downplays the actual accomplishments. JMO

When my son was in kindergarten, a picture appeared in our local paper of him jumping on a trampoline during the school's physical fitness week. The caption read: "Hearing impaired student, ....." I immediately notified the paper, for 2 reasons: one: the use of "hearing impaired", and two: I asked them if it had been another student would the caption have read "Hearing student..." I let them know that hearing status had virtually nothing to do with him jumping on a trampoline and did not need to be mentioned at all.