Has anyone ever tried stand up comedy in front of an unknown audience?

Okaayy...

Here's one.

A deaf person can do anything except here. Maybe over there, but not here.

Or this one?

If the I's have it, why cannot the ear's have it, too?

Or this one?

A deaf mime is a terrible thing. He's deaf, mute, and completely boxed in.

Jokes are copyright of Kokonut since 2007. Seriously.
 
TXgolfer said:
:dunno:

Part of the routine I did was about my being left handed and it was really a parody..

. Then I went to how it feels when right handed people give me dirty looks when I date right handed women. Then I explained that the reason right handed men lose women to left handed men is because.....as everybody knows......lefthanders are more creative. pretty good laugh there

In another part I commented on how it was wrong to use derogatory language like lefty or southpaw to note how we are different. I mean southpaw.....it's like we are not even human....they laughed at that.

Then I started a story about my friend lefty.....which they immediately noticed (lol) so then I explained that when a left handed person calls another lefty it means something totally different because we are suffering together.....That got a big laugh. I think if it is funny and not mean......most people will laugh.

Then I got away from that and noted that most left handed people are ambidexterous......but that the only benefit that I had found so far was that I could pleasure myself and fast forward a movie at the same time. That got the best laugh.


My apologies if this offends anyone here. Everyone at the show laughed.
Click to expand...

:lol: I actually laughed and I'm a lefty guy except for the mouse (computer).
 
kokonut said:
Okaayy...

Here's one.

A deaf person can do anything except here. Maybe over there, but not here.

Or this one?

If the I's have it, why cannot the ear's have it, too?

Or this one?

A deaf mime is a terrible thing. He's deaf, mute, and completely boxed in.

Jokes are copyright of Kokonut since 2007. Seriously.
Click to expand...

Don't quit your day job.

I prefer to tell dry jokes, which people may not get but I'm sure I'd be huge in the UK.
 
What's a silent film? When you have a group of deaf people watching a movie in a theater.

*bada bing*
 
TXgolfer said:
:dunno:

Part of the routine I did was about my being left handed and it was really a parody..

. Then I went to how it feels when right handed people give me dirty looks when I date right handed women. Then I explained that the reason right handed men lose women to left handed men is because.....as everybody knows......lefthanders are more creative. pretty good laugh there

In another part I commented on how it was wrong to use derogatory language like lefty or southpaw to note how we are different. I mean southpaw.....it's like we are not even human....they laughed at that.

Then I started a story about my friend lefty.....which they immediately noticed (lol) so then I explained that when a left handed person calls another lefty it means something totally different because we are suffering together.....That got a big laugh. I think if it is funny and not mean......most people will laugh.

Then I got away from that and noted that most left handed people are ambidexterous......but that the only benefit that I had found so far was that I could pleasure myself and fast forward a movie at the same time. That got the best laugh.


My apologies if this offends anyone here. Everyone at the show laughed.
Click to expand...

if anyone got offended by your joke - then she needs to go out with a left-handed person

and I'm ambidextrous :cool2:
 
Some moments as a comendian: once my boss dropped the clock and it bounced on the floor. I said be careful, you just might kill time.. I got a lot of laughter.

Earlier today, I visted my neighbor Cookie James and her daughte Alesha. They had flower petals in a bag.. they were yellowish looking and it was from the flower that her daughter got at her prom a month ago. I said I thought those petals were potato chips. I got a lot of laughs that time.


On WoW: I seem to be very funny when commenting on battlegrounds:

When things were going badly in Warsong, I said "it's dinner time and I'm afraid we're dinner." I got quite a few laughs at that one.
 
he's still funnier even at his start
 
kokonut said:
Even Chris Rock had his start, too. He was no pro either.
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I laughed pretty hard at his jokes at the Boston Celtics game last night!:giggle:


People tell me I'm funny, but I wouldn't ever stand up in front of an audience. I am way too shy for that!:P
 
kokonut said:
Okaayy...

Here's one.

A deaf person can do anything except here. Maybe over there, but not here.

Or this one?

If the I's have it, why cannot the ear's have it, too?

Or this one?

A deaf mime is a terrible thing. He's deaf, mute, and completely boxed in.

Jokes are copyright of Kokonut since 2007. Seriously.
Click to expand...

Old jokes. Seriously.
 
Beowulf said:
I copywrote that. You'll be hearing from my attorney.
Click to expand...

fry-see-what-you-did-there.jpg


:lol:
 
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