rockin'robin
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Apr 22, 2007
- Messages
- 24,431
- Reaction score
- 549
Tennessee
The
owner of a golf course was confused about paying an invoice,
so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical
help. He called her into his office and said, 'You graduated
from the
University of
Tennessee and I need some help. If I were to
give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take
off?'
The
secretary thought a moment, and then replied, 'Everything
but my earrings.'
Alabama
A
group of
Alabama friends
went deer
hunting and paired off in twos for the day. That
night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under
the weight of an eight-point buck. 'Where's Henry?' the
others asked.
'Henry
had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up
the trail,' the successful hunter replied.
'You left
Henry laying out there and carried the deer back?' they
inquired.
'A
tough call,' nodded the hunter. 'But I figured no one is
going to steal Henry!'
Texas
The Sheriff
pulled up next to the guy unloading garbage out of his
pick-up into the ditch. The Sheriff asked, 'Why are you
dumping garbage in the ditch? Don' t you see that sign right
over your head'. 'Yep', he replied. 'That's why I dumpin it
here, cause it says 'Fine For Dumping
Garbage'.
Louisiana
A
senior at LSU was overheard saying... 'When the end of the
world comes, I hope to be in
Louisiana .'
When asked why, he replied he'd rather be in
Louisiana because
everything happens in
Louisiana 20
years later than in the rest of the civilized
world.
Mississippi
The
young man from
Mississippi came
running into the store and said to his buddy, 'Bubba,
somebody just stole your pickup
truck
from the parking lot!'
Bubba replied, 'Did you see
who it was?'
The young man answered, 'I couldn't
tell, but I got his license number.'
Georgia
A
Georgia
State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-
75. The trooper asked, 'Got any I.D.?'
The driver
replied, 'Bout whut?'
North
Carolina
A
man in
North Carolina had
a flat
tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and
proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of t he car
and one behind it.
Then he got back in the car to
wait. A passerby studied the scene as he drove by and was so
curious he turned around and went back. He asked the fellow
what the problem was..
The man replied, 'I have a
flat tire.'
The passerby asked, 'But what's with the
flowers?'
The man responded, 'When you break down
they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the
back. Hey, it don't make no sense to me
neither.'
And
this from
South
Carolina
'You
can say what you want about the South, but I ain't never
heard of nobody wanting to retire to the North.
The
owner of a golf course was confused about paying an invoice,
so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical
help. He called her into his office and said, 'You graduated
from the
University of
Tennessee and I need some help. If I were to
give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take
off?'
The
secretary thought a moment, and then replied, 'Everything
but my earrings.'
Alabama
A
group of
Alabama friends
went deer
hunting and paired off in twos for the day. That
night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under
the weight of an eight-point buck. 'Where's Henry?' the
others asked.
'Henry
had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up
the trail,' the successful hunter replied.
'You left
Henry laying out there and carried the deer back?' they
inquired.
'A
tough call,' nodded the hunter. 'But I figured no one is
going to steal Henry!'
Texas
The Sheriff
pulled up next to the guy unloading garbage out of his
pick-up into the ditch. The Sheriff asked, 'Why are you
dumping garbage in the ditch? Don' t you see that sign right
over your head'. 'Yep', he replied. 'That's why I dumpin it
here, cause it says 'Fine For Dumping
Garbage'.
Louisiana
A
senior at LSU was overheard saying... 'When the end of the
world comes, I hope to be in
Louisiana .'
When asked why, he replied he'd rather be in
Louisiana because
everything happens in
Louisiana 20
years later than in the rest of the civilized
world.
Mississippi
The
young man from
Mississippi came
running into the store and said to his buddy, 'Bubba,
somebody just stole your pickup
truck
from the parking lot!'
Bubba replied, 'Did you see
who it was?'
The young man answered, 'I couldn't
tell, but I got his license number.'
Georgia
A
Georgia
State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-
75. The trooper asked, 'Got any I.D.?'
The driver
replied, 'Bout whut?'
North
Carolina
A
man in
North Carolina had
a flat
tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and
proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of t he car
and one behind it.
Then he got back in the car to
wait. A passerby studied the scene as he drove by and was so
curious he turned around and went back. He asked the fellow
what the problem was..
The man replied, 'I have a
flat tire.'
The passerby asked, 'But what's with the
flowers?'
The man responded, 'When you break down
they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the
back. Hey, it don't make no sense to me
neither.'
And
this from
South
Carolina
'You
can say what you want about the South, but I ain't never
heard of nobody wanting to retire to the North.
here's Northerner stereotypical joke for you - 
