Got Any Grapes?

Teekie

Teekie

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A ducks walks into a bar and asks, "Got any grapes?"

The bartender, confused, tells the ducks that no, his bar doesn't serve grapes. The duck thanks him and leaves.

The next day, the duck returns and says, "Got any grapes?"

Again, the bartender tells him that, no, the bar does not serve grapes, has never served grapes, and, furthermore, will never serve grapes. The duck, a little ruffled, thanks him and leaves.

The next day, the duck returns, but before he can say anything, the bartender begins to yell: ''Listen, duck! This is a bar! We do not serve grapes! If you ever ask for grapes again, I will nail your stupid duck beak to the bar!''

The duck is silent for a moment, and then asks, ''Got any nails?''

Confused, the bartender says no.

''Good!'' says the duck. ''Got any grapes?''
 
alright heres another joke...

Jesus goes into a bar, theres 3 men sitting on the bar...jesus sits far away from them.......A crippled man asks the bartender to give Jesus the most expensive wine they have, the bartender gives jesus the wine, Jesus asks who gave me this wine? the bartender says, the crippled man over there, jesus gets up and goes to the man,Jesus thanks the man and touched his leg, the man got up and he was all fine....not crippled anymore and the man thanks jesus, jesus goes back and sits down

A blind man calls the bartender and tells the bartender to give jesus the most expensive cigar you have, the bartender goes to Jesus and gives the cigar, jesus asks who is this from? the bartender says the guy over there, jesus gets up and goes to the man, Jesus thanks him, and touched his eyes, the man's vision cleared up and wasnt blind anymore....jesus goes back to his seat and sits

Then a deaf man asks the bartender to give Jesus the most expensive beer you have, the bartender gives jesus the most expensive beer, Jesus asks who is this from? the bartender says the guy over there, jesus gets up, goes to the man, thanks him, and was going to touch the man's ears but the man covered his ears and said:

NO NO I WANT TO KEEP MY SSI DONT MAKE ME HEARING!!!!!:laugh2:
 
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