gay McDonald's commercial

When I was in my 20's a bunch of the guys went to a midnight porn movie. In those days "hard core porn" was a gal dancing around stripping until she only had pasties to cover her nippies.

When we came out some man on the street snarled, "You watch that kind of crap. How would you feel if it was your daughter up on that screen?"

One of my friends quipped back, "A hell of a lot better than if it were my mother."
 
my folks were the last people I came out-and they are very open-minded
haven't seen the commercial, hope it is helpful to someone
 
You can't come out to all parents. My grand daughters know a boy, only 14 who was told by an idiot counselor that the only way he could become a complete human being was to admit to all that he was gay.

Sure.

His parents belong to a church that is very strict on such matters.

So they threw him out of the house and in order to keep from juvenile hall or sleeping under bridges is living with an older gay man. My grand daughters don't believe he is attending school any more. They are not sure.

His parents attitude is they don't care what he does, where he goes, or who with, so long as he never comes within sight of them again.

Frankly I think he should sue his counselor for support.

Maybe his parents too.
 
I don't think the counselor was being an idiot. You only know second hand information about what the counselor said. I don't think they meant that for him to come out of the closet was the only way to become a complete human being. I think they were trying to help him understand that he had the potential to feel better. Feeling conflicted about who you are and how you feel is pretty difficult, let alone at 14.

The only people who can be considered idiots in that scenario are the parents.
 
DJGrace said:
I don't think the counselor was being an idiot. You only know second hand information about what the counselor said. I don't think they meant that for him to come out of the closet was the only way to become a complete human being. I think they were trying to help him understand that he had the potential to feel better. Feeling conflicted about who you are and how you feel is pretty difficult, let alone at 14.

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Saying the same thing twice. Feeling conflicted and being whole are impossible. Try it in ASL: it won't work.

And either way you say it I agree with the counselor's assessment.

But:

DJGrace said:
I don't think the counselor was being an idiot.

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A counselor by definition should be expert at understanding that people have problems coping with themselves and with others. Institutions as well. The counselor should have discovered the biases of the parents before giving catastrophic advice. In other words the counselor should have been aware the parents subscribed to a belief system that would make confessing homosexuality problematic.

At least for a 14 year old. I think this happened a year or so ago.

Would this counselor give the same advice to a career military man?


The only people who can be considered idiots in that scenario are the parents

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I personally think referring to the parents as idiots is kind and generous of you. I admire your restraint and will say nothing about them myself.
 
I suspect certain groups might avoid Mikky D's because of that ad.

Does that mean some GLTB's (and friends of) might gravitate there because of it?
 
TheWriteAlex said:
Doesn't make sense to me at all. It says "come as you are" as a sort of welcoming, inclusive message. But then at the same time it seems to be reinforcing the idea that gays need to hide their identities by implying that the father doesn't know his son is gay and that the son can't talk to his father about it.

Am I missing something here???
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No but from where I stand you are reading in a whole lot that may or may not be there.
 
Berry said:
You can't come out to all parents. My grand daughters know a boy, only 14 who was told by an idiot counselor that the only way he could become a complete human being was to admit to all that he was gay.

Sure.

His parents belong to a church that is very strict on such matters.

So they threw him out of the house and in order to keep from juvenile hall or sleeping under bridges is living with an older gay man. My grand daughters don't believe he is attending school any more. They are not sure.

His parents attitude is they don't care what he does, where he goes, or who with, so long as he never comes within sight of them again.

Frankly I think he should sue his counselor for support.

Maybe his parents too.
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Being in the profession, that really doesn't surprise me, unfortunately. Far too often, they look at the individual without taking the time to consider the environmental influences that will have an impact on that decision. That old "complete honesty is the best policy" may look good regarding moral development, but practically, there are many other circumstances that must be considered. While I would have encouraged the young man to maintain self honesty regarding his orientation, I would have also urged him to exercise caution in the people he chose to be that honest with. Society as a whole still doesn't look on homosexual orientation very favorably.
 
Berry said:
Saying the same thing twice. Feeling conflicted and being whole are impossible. Try it in ASL: it won't work.

And either way you say it I agree with the counselor's assessment.

But:



A counselor by definition should be expert at understanding that people have problems coping with themselves and with others. Institutions as well. The counselor should have discovered the biases of the parents before giving catastrophic advice. In other words the counselor should have been aware the parents subscribed to a belief system that would make confessing homosexuality problematic.

At least for a 14 year old. I think this happened a year or so ago.

Would this counselor give the same advice to a career military man?





I personally think referring to the parents as idiots is kind and generous of you. I admire your restraint and will say nothing about them myself.
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Frankly, the counselor should not have been giving advise at all. That is not what counseling is all about. She should have taken the time to help him explore his options and the possible consequences of any action, and then support him in the decision he made regarding what action he was comfortable with. We are not in this business to give people answers...we are there to help them find the answers within themselves given their own particular circumstances.
 
jillio said:
Frankly, the counselor should not have been giving advise at all. That is not what counseling is all about. She should have taken the time to help him explore his options and the possible consequences of any action, and then support him in the decision he made regarding what action he was comfortable with. We are not in this business to give people answers...we are there to help them find the answers within themselves given their own particular circumstances.
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Aw Heck.

In that case I've been a counselor most of my life -- And so was my mother before me.
 
Like I said, we're going on some hearsay about what the counselor said. Which is why I'm giving the benefit of the doubt to the counselor because of assumed professionalism. Maybe they gave cautious advice to the kid and maybe he didn't quite follow it and ended up in the situation he's in. And maybe from that he told people otherwise. And like I said, none of us really knows what happened.

My thoughts on the parents are my thoughts. If you wanna discard your kid over who they are, go nuts, it's your life and such. But, I am entitled to my opinion about that.
 
DJGrace said:
Like I said, we're going on some hearsay about what the counselor said. Which is why I'm giving the benefit of the doubt to the counselor because of assumed professionalism.

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What would you assume about a 14 year old boy who is struggling with his non standard sexual identity in a household with an Ecclesiastical view of homosexuality?

DJGrace said:
My thoughts on the parents are my thoughts. If you wanna discard your kid over who they are, go nuts, it's your life and such. But, I am entitled to my opinion about that

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They certainly are. And they are generous compared to my thoughts.

But as a writer I wonder what their thoughts might be. Do they ever lie awake at night torn between the love they once had for their child and their belief system?
 
I definitely wouldn't advise any queer kid to come out to their knowingly homophobic parents while the kid still completely emotionally and financially dependent on them. Bad move.
 
Berry said:
What would you assume about a 14 year old boy who is struggling with his non standard sexual identity in a household with an Ecclesiastical view of homosexuality?



They certainly are. And they are generous compared to my thoughts.

But as a writer I wonder what their thoughts might be. Do they ever lie awake at night torn between the love they once had for their child and their belief system?
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One would certainly hope that their belief system has not robbed them of enough humanity to prevent them from agonizing over their actions.
 
CJB said:
I definitely wouldn't advise any queer kid to come out to their knowingly homophobic parents while the kid still completely emotionally and financially dependent on them. Bad move.
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Agreed.
 
I cannot picture a 14 taking such a clear cut stand without some hefty encouragement from someone. The 14 year olds I've known would tend to be moody, morose, rebellious, argumentative, but that is not taking a solid stand on their value system.

The parent will ask, "What is wrong with you?"

But the kids aren't ready to say.
 
Berry said:
I cannot picture a 14 taking such a clear cut stand without some hefty encouragement from someone. The 14 year olds I've known would tend to be moody, morose, rebellious, argumentative, but that is not taking a solid stand on their value system.

The parent will ask, "What is wrong with you?"

But the kids aren't ready to say.
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Again with an accurate call. Developmentally, 14 year olds simply do not take such a stance without encouragement from a respected adult.
 
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