Enabling-Let's discuss!

coloravalanche said:
BTW, another night, when RS insulted me...later apologized to me..I told him I forgave him...but it doesnt mean I have done anything wrong.

Remember, Deafies have their own languages...we sometimes dont realized which is positive or negative enabling.
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Good point.

It doesn't mean that you make negative enabling because you respond RS's thread.

I was like :eek: after saw Banjo's negative/positive lists "Calm down" because I calm members down sometimes when they jump on me with their wrong heads. :dunno:
 
I thought a lot about what enabling would mean to me... and I think I have a different meaning for it now from a year ago. Socrates made great threads that are still good today :) Thanks Socrates!!

I wanted to bring food for thought on this topic - I don't feel we are responsible for others' behavior in the sense we have to "assume" the responsibility in how others conduct themselves? What do you think about this part? It's probably a matter of doing what we feel to be right in how we contribute to an environment from our part? I think it boils down to this - a person's integrity.

The absence of integrity or ethics in one's behavior or approval is negative enabling. The presence of integrity or ethics in one's behavior or approval is positive enabling.

I see it as another word for encouragement or approval of a certain event or behavior through different ways that can mean a "YES I APPROVE OF WHAT YOU ARE DOING SO GO ON AS YOU WERE," if that fits. We might be too passive to say what's on our minds, or we might be too aggressive and drown out others' voices - either way may be considered enabling negatively. Being just assertive can be considered positive enabling (confrontations, speaking one's truth, agreeing to disagree, etc).

What we say or how we behave can send a certain message to others, and that can be considered as enabling either negative or positive. Makes sense?
 
:shock: Wow this is really a good topics. It sure an eye opener!!! Thanks for this topic.
 
Excellent topic -- enabling often goes hand in hand with co-dependency.

Read the other thread for more info. on that...
 
Socrates is Deaf.

Deaf people do have their own language and approaches. It is because of the cultural differences within the hearing and deaf world. Some deaf people would rather be blunt and uncouth whereas some hearing people will be assertive and tell their opinion with tact.

Telling the truth bluntly without tact carries little integrity whereas if you tell the truth with tact and in a proper manner carries in a much farther strength.
 
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