Effects of absence of an older male role model on women?

[Strong]

I grew up without an older male role model and it was really hard for me to cope with it. I feel so lost right now. I know women who were unfortunately in this situation are attracted to older men to seek the relationship with them that they have never had with their fathers (or lack thereof).

So how can I cope with it and because of the lack of male role model in my life, how can I ensure that I avoid abusive relationships and find my Prince Charming? Sorry for being melodramatic (for saying "Prince Charming").

 

[hoichi]

mmmmm ok. wont feed you any pychobabale or anything as thats not my style so......
my best advice to cope with the above is to let it go, literally view it as some tough luck that made you stronger and be done with it. the longer you keep it alive by trying to cope the more power the issue will get
the past is the past. its gone baby gone.
now and tmw is what matter. nothin wrong with digin the older guys, what ever turns you on, its a free country
take control of your life by havin a good handle on it. know the past is gone and know tmw is near
act accordingly and above all
(lights smoke, sips drink, sits back, exhales.....)
have fun

 

[Reba]

Since you have an awareness of your experience, that should make you more cautious and analytical of any potential relationships. That's a positive.

My father wasn't around much after my first eight years of life, so I understand.

I married a man one year younger than me. We are still happily married almost 40 years later.

You aren't doomed by your history.

 

[shezzbeav]

My father wasn't around for 18 years, and we only re-connected 8 years ago, and now we're not speaking. Long story, but I grew up not trusting males.

I dated a few males, but I wasn't comfortable with any of them. I couldn't be myself around them. I found myself having more romantic feelings towards women - which turns to be more intense than that for men.

I'm just happy enough to have a couple of male friends in my life, but for anything more than that, I cannot fathom it. Plus I've always been more comfortable and myself around girls.

 

[dereksbicycles]

I dated one woman whose Dad passed away when she was 10 years old. She was only few years younger than me. We had some issues in our relationship. I wonder if it had something to do with this one. However, I have since moved from this relationship.

 

[ChicagoBlue2]

I dated one woman whose Dad passed away when she was 10 years old. She was only few years younger than me. We had some issues in our relationship. I wonder if it had something to do with this one. However, I have since moved from this relationship.

For whatever reason, I always seem to attract a lady's wandering eyes, and that itself is not a wonderful thought, because of the "what if's", and I've also heard that ladies who grew up without a male in their lives are particularly attracted to males who have the smarts, and widsom, and they may want that guy for themselves, or a guy who has a heart, and is encouraging (like myself), and would be willing to help a lady, but that's just me.

 

[dereksbicycles]

For whatever reason, I always seem to attract a lady's wandering eyes, and that itself is not a wonderful thought, because of the "what if's", and I've also heard that ladies who grew up without a male in their lives are particularly attracted to males who have the smarts, and widsom, and they may want that guy for themselves, or a guy who has a heart, and is encouraging (like myself), and would be willing to help a lady, but that's just me.

Interesting. I usually think of them wanting more money or part of "action" rather than having father figure. By action, I am not referring to sex. I am more thinking of companies that throw gala parties. If those people dates honcho of a company, then they get entry in party. Smooch up to important people and get their feet in door easier.

That is not always the case, but simply what I see from my observation.