- Joined
- Jun 7, 2008
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At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall.
'Big breaths,' . . . I instructed.
'Yes, they used to be,' . . . replied the patient.
Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes, Seattle WA
A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam.
The doctor arrived, examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast fed or bottle fed.
'Breast-fed,' she replied.
'Well, strip down to your waist, ' the doctor ordered.
She did.
He pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a very professional and detailed examination.
Motioning to her to get dressed, the doctor said, ' No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk.'
'I know,' she said, 'I'm his grandma, but I'm sure glad I came.'
AND . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ..
As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB, I was quite embarrassed when performing female pelvic exams.
To cover my embarrassment I had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly.
The middle-aged lady upon whom I was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassing me.
I looked up from my work and sheepishly said, 'I'm sorry. Was I tickling you?'
She replied with tears running down her cheeks from laughing so hard, 'No doctor but the song you were whistling was 'I wish I was an Oscar Mayer Wiener.'
Dr. wouldn't submit his name.
'Big breaths,' . . . I instructed.
'Yes, they used to be,' . . . replied the patient.
Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes, Seattle WA
A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam.
The doctor arrived, examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast fed or bottle fed.
'Breast-fed,' she replied.
'Well, strip down to your waist, ' the doctor ordered.
She did.
He pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a very professional and detailed examination.
Motioning to her to get dressed, the doctor said, ' No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk.'
'I know,' she said, 'I'm his grandma, but I'm sure glad I came.'
AND . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ..
As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB, I was quite embarrassed when performing female pelvic exams.
To cover my embarrassment I had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly.
The middle-aged lady upon whom I was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassing me.
I looked up from my work and sheepishly said, 'I'm sorry. Was I tickling you?'
She replied with tears running down her cheeks from laughing so hard, 'No doctor but the song you were whistling was 'I wish I was an Oscar Mayer Wiener.'
Dr. wouldn't submit his name.
Those are funny!
