do u find it hard being hoh in the real world?

Just this morning at my deaf church, I was asked if I was hearing, hoh or deaf. I replied deaf, but oral and learning ASL. I was then asked about my hearing loss. I told them the whole story and they said that I was technically deaf since birth, not hearing or hoh. They said that even though I spoke more than signed, I was still deaf and not an oralist. This was a group that included deaf, hoh CODA, terps, ENT's and 2 audi's.
 
DeafCaroline said:
Ok, that's fine. People can label me whatever they want, I know what I am and it's good enough for me. :)
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Deafcaroline, that's exactly how people should feel. Whatever I feel I am is good enough for me, too. If they don't like how I define myself, not my problem.
 
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you match your personal HOH and deaf hard not easy complication relationship I hard to find on hearing impossible not easy impossible

worlds is many deaf and hearing normal! it is very happened future reason future! predict I win final on search dating! not easy search girl not easy not perfect that is correct

Not perfect is one day not way, long time patient struggle your own skills and quality on person, my theory, I study on person!
 
It can be frustrating, but I guess because I have been hoh for as long as I can remember, I have automatically adjusted for it. I was almost 5 before I was properly diagnosed as being deaf in my left ear and hoh in my right.

I have to explain to people that it is useless to whisper anything in my left ear because I won't hear it. If you want to talk to me you must be either in front of me or on my right side for me to make out what your'e saying, even then I still 'speech read' to an extent.

I will usually watch TV with the captions so I can understand all of the dialogue. I can understand the radio as so long as there isn't a lot of static and that it's up a bit high.

I don't like in social situations where the room is dark and/or if there is a lot of background noise to have to compete with.

I do have a slight speech impediment due to my hearing, so if I am getting frustrated with it, don't be surprised if I just whip out my iPhone and type what I want said out and ask you to either write yours on pen and paper or to do the same on your phone.

I also hate going through drive-thrus and ordering food at Sonic. I am better off going into the store and ordering it face to face.

I have been forced all of my life to deal with the fully hearing w/o accommodations and I do get frustrated but I've accepted it as a fact of life that I will have to explain things to those who don't know and twads that I have already explained it to 100 times before that still don't get it.

I remember the time I was I at WM and I was getting sliced deli meat for my mom when I got frustrated with my speech and lack of ability to understand the deli lady that I finally just whipped out my phone and typed out what I wanted. She gave me a crazy look like "you're a weird puppy...'. I just pointed at my ear and said 'deaf'. She finally got it. I had my order out in no time after that, lol.
 
** do you mean real world aka the hearing world?** struggling to fit to be a hearie?
 
The problem with being late deafened is that you already have an established life in the hearing world, and suddenly you don't fit in it anymore. People in your life don't understand and don't want to make changes that affect them. You're supposed to accomodate hearing people. If you seek out Deaf community, some people in your life take it personally and consider it rejection. That's why late deafened people feel trapped between worlds.

I found that defining myself and not requiring myself to meet other people's expectations was the solution. But this is the lession that we all learn in life. It just got clearer to me because of my situation.
 
:wave:Sally,

I see what you mean about sometimes people feeling rejected...my hubby has hinted he sometimes feels that way. He has other stuff going on where this kinda thing comes out.
My husband is deaf. He has a strong personal affiliation with hearing ways and was not introduced to Deaf culture until he met me actually. I was in college, working with Deaf kids in a recreational program and he came to visit me over the Summer.

I think due to a lot of personal emotional baggage aside from his hearing level he's always tried to "fit in". I've never fit into things and have stopped trying very much.
It takes courage to reach both out and in, to be alignment with one's authentic self...
 
Some people are more social and need to fit. I've always had a hard time fitting in. I'm not a social butterfly. :lol:

I'm still working in the authentic self thing. Each stage of life brings it own challenges and rewards. I have a stronger sense of myself as I grow older. :cool2:
 
i do! I find it very difficult!! Up until a few months ago i had normal hearing and i now have a moderate-severe hearing loss. Losing my hearing was a massive shock. My parents still wont accept it and wont let me wear hearing aids. I'm finding it extremely difficult being hard of hearing in a hearing world!!
 
el...888 said:
i do! I find it very difficult!! Up until a few months ago i had normal hearing and i now have a moderate-severe hearing loss. Losing my hearing was a massive shock. My parents still wont accept it and wont let me wear hearing aids. I'm finding it extremely difficult being hard of hearing in a hearing world!!
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Hey, I remember you! Did you contact anyone for help?
 
DeafCaroline... i tried to PM you this morning as you'd said you wouldnt mind, but i couldnt work out how to do it. so i tried to send you a message on yahoo but i dont think it was that successful!
 
crazy said:
It can be hard sometime... but usually not. The only problem I have is that there are hearing people who would say something to you then later, when you know what they said, they would say... "oh no... you didn't hear what I said". I really hate that!
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I've had this experience too. Makes me furious! :mad2:
I know of another HOH person who was promised an important job by a boss; but when he came to get it, was told that he was mistaken and the job was never promised. The HOH person challenged but nobody believed him as the liar boss said he never promised it and that the HOH person misheard him.
 
el...888 said:
DeafCaroline... i tried to PM you this morning as you'd said you wouldnt mind, but i couldnt work out how to do it. so i tried to send you a message on yahoo but i dont think it was that successful!
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There is actually a minimum number of posts you must have first before you can use PM. (I don't recall the #. It used to be 50, then 25, now maybe lower?) That is probably why it didn't work.
 
This is interesting, with my implant I am hard of hearing( I still have trouble hearing and understanding people), but with and without my implant it is hard living in the hearing world, which is where I live day in day out. I'd love it, if I could just be totally deaf for a week or so and reverse roles!!
 
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