Deaf husband question for Dear Abby

caz12 said:
poor bugger I wonder if he knows it on yahoo news anyone who reads it now knows his wife pain in arse
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The husband may be be trying get his wife out of their apartment so he
can break his hearing and implant . :laugh2:
 
the lady on another thread with dystonia her condition very hard but she deals with it she sort of person I admire I don't feel sorry or pity I openly admire her I sympathize with pain she has though.Wish something around that would help.
this dear abby lady at pity party probably why he won't join her
 
I wonder if he has auditory processing disorder. In most people our auditory processing abilities peak around 30. If that's the case then hearing aids aren't going to be much help.

I've had it all my life and socializing has always been uncomfortable and tiring.
 
She does sound like she's looking for a pity party but it can be hard if she doesn't want to socialize alone and he doesn't want to do it at all.
 
jonnyghost said:
I wonder if he has auditory processing disorder. In most people our auditory processing abilities peak around 30. If that's the case then hearing aids aren't going to be much help.

I've had it all my life and socializing has always been uncomfortable and tiring.
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jonnyghost, I thought of that too!
 
I would really had loved to heard the husband side of this , it's hard to give good advice when you're only hearing one side of the story.
 
I am wondering if his wife is making him feel as though he is making them, as a couple, a pariah??? That might be why he wants her to go to the meals alone - so she will leave him alone???

I know, from experience, that there are far more understanding people out there than people who intentionally avoid someone because they are deaf .... I mean .. COME ON!!! The ones who avoid them aren't worth the time of day.
 
Reba said:
What do you think of Abby's advice for this couple?

Wife of Deaf Husband Seeks to Cope
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not much of an advice in there.

2 things - both of them should explore ASL as another way to communicate. and they should check out retirement community or assisted living senior homes for deafies/hoh. I've involved with NJ organization for deaf seniors.
 
Jiro said:
not much of an advice in there.

2 things - both of them should explore ASL as another way to communicate. and they should check out retirement community or assisted living senior homes for deafies/hoh. I've involved with NJ organization for deaf seniors.
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Jiro!!! You just beat me to the ASL suggestion idea so they can learn how to sign in the Deaf class.

As for the retirement community for the Deaf and Hard Of Hearing, there is a retirement apartments in Arizona (probably not far from Phoenix). That would be great for him and his hearing wife if she can sign ASL with him otherwise he would be alone if they don't know how to sign ASL. Bummer, communication is very important between them. Geeze. :(
 
Bebonang said:
Jiro!!! You just beat me to the ASL suggestion idea so they can learn how to sign in the Deaf class.

As for the retirement community for the Deaf and Hard Of Hearing, there is a retirement apartments in Arizona (probably not far from Phoenix). That would be great for him and his hearing wife if she can sign ASL with him otherwise he would be alone if they don't know how to sign ASL. Bummer, communication is very important between them. Geeze. :(
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yep. http://www.apacheasltrails.com/

the president of the organization I'm involved with.... she was part of the team to make it happened in Arizona. now we're working on another one in NJ but we're facing with gigantic road-blocks cuz of legal issues and finding major financial backers.
 
May I point out these two people have NONE of the experience you people have?

This is the case of late deafness, probably quite late, of a senior couple,
and it does isolate very much if you have no idea how to deal with it.
This couple obviously used ears and speech all their life, and no wonder the wife is worried - worried, not embarrassed - how her husband will communicate with other hearies with his significant hearing loss.
CI and HA - all that probably in a matter of few years, and without previous experience with hearing loss.

She doesn't make a fuss about "what does it look like". On the contrary - she is deeply concerned about her husband being rejected and abandoned due to his communication difficulties.
that's why she frets about sitting together and then being left alone.

She probably worries her husband will get depressed or already is,
and worries about that, too.
that's' why she is looking for help, that's why she wrote to D A.

As for D A, well her response is as limited as it is because Abby, being just a newspaper (or magazine?) columnist,
is not licensed to give out a detailed, professional advice re: hearing loss, hearing aids, psychotherapy, senior's problems etc etc.
She did her best with what she was given (written),
and IMO she did good enough - she did pointed out it's the nursing home staff's responsibility to ensure anybody's special needs are meet,
and she did pointed out there might be a room for improvement regarding CI and HA - indeed there could be,
considering this lovely couple may have no idea how to properly service these things.

Nothing else a mere columnist can do, and in a limited column space at that.

Fuzzy
 
he in residential home not a complex for older people not realized that.could't she doctor responsible for them all.
 
Why don't the husband sit at men table and talk about the good old days. You know the days when it was actually affordable to drive something turbocharged.
 
Audiofuzzy said:
May I point out these two people have NONE of the experience you people have?

This is the case of late deafness, probably quite late, of a senior couple,
and it does isolate very much if you have no idea how to deal with it.
This couple obviously used ears and speech all their life, and no wonder the wife is worried - worried, not embarrassed - how her husband will communicate with other hearies with his significant hearing loss.
CI and HA - all that probably in a matter of few years, and without previous experience with hearing loss.

She doesn't make a fuss about "what does it look like". On the contrary - she is deeply concerned about her husband being rejected and abandoned due to his communication difficulties.
that's why she frets about sitting together and then being left alone.

She probably worries her husband will get depressed or already is,
and worries about that, too.
that's' why she is looking for help, that's why she wrote to D A.

As for D A, well her response is as limited as it is because Abby, being just a newspaper (or magazine?) columnist,
is not licensed to give out a detailed, professional advice re: hearing loss, hearing aids, psychotherapy, senior's problems etc etc.
She did her best with what she was given (written),
and IMO she did good enough - she did pointed out it's the nursing home staff's responsibility to ensure anybody's special needs are meet,
and she did pointed out there might be a room for improvement regarding CI and HA - indeed there could be,
considering this lovely couple may have no idea how to properly service these things.

Nothing else a mere columnist can do, and in a limited column space at that.

Fuzzy
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And it may help to point out that Dear Abby may have no experience dealing with being deaf or hoh . The wife would had been better off talking to her husband audi than to some stranger that does not know the couple. Dear Abby would be the last person I use for advice .
 
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