Deaf/HOH and PTSD

Chanse_It

Chanse_It

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I've been noticing since I started my new retail jobs, that I startle easy again. A coworker today for example, was trying to put something away below my feet at the register... so when I caught a glimpse of him coming from behind my right side, to the front I almost kneed the guy in the face! I think he was equally as startled judging his expression. There have been a few instances like this and I always jump. It used to be better, I used to have it under control, but I guess not having my back against the wall, new people, new stimulation Idk. Especially when coworkers or people graze me walking by, it's an instant reflex for my hands to respond somehow. They go up, or they slap away whatever was touching me, or a punch is thrown... it just depends on the situation I guess. Shit, this has been happening at home now too. My family has learned to tap me, or touch me, even throw pillows (sister) sometimes to get my attention. The pillow doesn't bother me, but anytime I'm touched now without first noticing someone, I jump. It's crazy. I mean I've almost backhanded my mother at one point. When I could hear I had this shit on lock. It wasn't an issue after a certain point. But now that hearing loss is a part of my life, Idk how to handle it somedays.. bad anxiety. Hell, Idk.. rambling now. I guess what I'd like to know if anyone has experienced the same or similar kind of feeling? What do you do about it, how do you manage it? Physical contact is pretty important to get attention and communicate, but when it makes you uneasy and triggers shit... what now? Get used to it? Smh.
 
Well, I was born with it... and I still startle sometimes if I am focused on something else... you'll ease up in certain cases though over time, I'm sure.
 
Thanks. High anxiety and restless night's all over again. I don't do well with people touching me right now. Guess you're right, ill just get over it eventually. Just wondered if and how others cope with it.
 
Not trying to be mean but yes get used to it ... to an extent ... so you'll figure out what is touching or near you before you go into fight or flight mode. But you'll never truly be fully immune to being startled. I started losing my hearing when I was a kid got my first hearing aid when I was 14 or 15 and now I have a cochlear implant in my left ear. Without it I'm totally deaf in that ear and it has to be as loud as a car horn for my right to pick sound up so when I'm without my CI I still startle easy if I'm not expecting something BUT I've gotten where if I'm out somewhere(always have my CI on) if someone brushes up against me it doesn't phase me that much. If its a person that crowds me and won't stop I'll get sarcastic it don't matter if its a man or a woman I'll turn to them and wink then say ... Hey Baby ...
joey_how_you_doin.gif

They usually back off LOL :laugh2:
 
If you feel it is really bad, maybe seek professional help. Maybe it is something deep rooted and it is surfacing now?
 
It sounds like a new environment place that you are not used to before. You may get used to it after a while once you warm up to your new job. I can understand about the complete strangers around you that you might not be comfortable with... once you get used to the job and the people around you, it may get better. We all encounter with strangers everyday and get startled easily.

It's probably good thing to be vigilant to your surroundings to protect yourself. There is some good employees, some are jerk, you don't always make friends at work as you only work there for money. Some people make friends at work, some don't.
 
I've seen it a lot in my dad, some of the times he hits people it only out of reflex, lol.
I avoid this by always being aware of everything. Sometimes when people touch me bump into me from behind I want to back hand them but it's harder to do when your hands are busy Making sandwiches. I guess my solution is to lower the possibility of suprise which consumes more energy, and probably makes me look like a chicken..
 
I was thinking a wearable proximity sensor would help those with both deafness and PTSD (or just one condition.) I looked around on Google, and there's some such, but there aren't any actual products that I could find. There are hackable solutions, using such devices as Arduino and Raspberry Pi, but that'd require multiple tech know-how to pull off. I wouldn't know where to begin personally, but I do know it can be done.

Ideally it'd be a device that's either on your wrist, like a bracelet, or using your smartphone to vibrate by degrees based on who was nearby and how far. There could also be a light that'd blink to warn you of someone nearby.

https://www.adafruit.com/ is a good place to look in that direction. Perhaps an email fired off to them could get them to come up with a solution to this to make life easier for those who react strongly to sudden and unexpected contact.
 
horus11B said:
I'm sorry... did you just say you were born with PTSD?
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OH MY... Are YOU.... Are you freaking kidding me?! I was born Deaf.... do I have to break everything down in this forum...... :roll: I have a Masters degree and am a Physicians Assistant but apparently I am retarded and said I was born with PTSD... What was the first subject of this thread?! DEAF / HoH / PTSD... You do not have to break down the topics if it is the first subject of the title and you are only addressing the one topic in the beginning, it is implied. Unless you are addressing the entire three topic and following the entire structure / writing a paper ( talking about indention and starting each paragraph with the inclusion of the topic here ) Where you would address the topics in order... it is automatically implied. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVERY single person here knew I was referring to Deafness.... except you. However, for you I will from now on be more careful to be sure and break down every single thing and simplify topics, okay?

epic-facepalm-when-you-just-know-you-messed-up-demotivational-poster-1253705267.jpg
 
Mewtilation said:
OH MY... Are YOU.... Are you freaking kidding me?! I was born Deaf.... do I have to break everything down in this forum...... :roll: I have a Masters degree and am a Physicians Assistant but apparently I am retarded and said I was born with PTSD... What was the first subject of this thread?! DEAF / HoH / PTSD... You do not have to break down the topics if it is the first subject of the title and you are only addressing the one topic in the beginning, it is implied. Unless you are addressing the entire three topic and following the entire structure / writing a paper ( talking about indention and starting each paragraph with the inclusion of the topic here ) Where you would address the topics in order... it is automatically implied. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVERY single person here knew I was referring to Deafness.... except you. However, for you I will from now on be more careful to be sure and break down every single thing and simplify topics, okay?

epic-facepalm-when-you-just-know-you-messed-up-demotivational-poster-1253705267.jpg
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I gotta admit...I liked ncff07's explanation. lol
 
Mewtilation said:
OH MY... Are YOU.... Are you freaking kidding me?! I was born Deaf.... do I have to break everything down in this forum...... :roll: I have a Masters degree and am a Physicians Assistant but apparently I am retarded and said I was born with PTSD... What was the first subject of this thread?! DEAF / HoH / PTSD... You do not have to break down the topics if it is the first subject of the title and you are only addressing the one topic in the beginning, it is implied. Unless you are addressing the entire three topic and following the entire structure / writing a paper ( talking about indention and starting each paragraph with the inclusion of the topic here ) Where you would address the topics in order... it is automatically implied. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVERY single person here knew I was referring to Deafness.... except you. However, for you I will from now on be more careful to be sure and break down every single thing and simplify topics, okay?

epic-facepalm-when-you-just-know-you-messed-up-demotivational-poster-1253705267.jpg
Click to expand...

I laughed aloud when I read your first one too. The subject here actually is PTSD! :lol:

Oh, and nobody is ever born Deaf.... It is always acquired.

I can explain that too if you need . :D
 
Are your coworker aware of you being HOH? If the co worker know you're HOH he should had let you known he was going be putting something away near your feet. You could had stepped on his hand or tripped on him. Your boss should had told your coworkers to let you know when they'll coming up behind you so someone will not get hurt. I know hearing people that will jump out of their skin when they're startled by someone coming up behind their back. My ex husband was like that and I thought I would get a heart attack too. I would not tell your boss you have PTSD . I have this too from growing up with a 'delightful 'father and I can understand having people getting into your space and coming up behind your back.
 
Bottesini said:
I laughed aloud when I read your first one too. The subject here actually is PTSD! :lol:

Oh, and nobody is ever born Deaf.... It is always acquired.

I can explain that too if you need . :D
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Unless I've misunderstood some sarcasm.. Agenesis, at the time of birth those with total agenesis are full deaf and have no ears.
 
Nothingless said:
Unless I've misunderstood some sarcasm.. Agenesis, at the time of birth those with total agenesis are full deaf and have no ears.
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Yes, you misunderstood.

But I am fairly confident that Mew, to whom I was speaking, will understand the distinction immediately.
 
Bottesini said:
Yes, you misunderstood.

But I am fairly confident that Mew, to whom I was speaking, will understand the distinction immediately.
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Yes, I understand the distinction. :P I was going off the title! :P I was assuming my explanation of telling her that I was born ( from an age I can remember ) with no hearing that I am sometimes still startled when people come up behind me! Bott stop making me break things down too!!! I know you know what I meant!!! :laugh2:

I also know someone assuming I meant I was born with PTSD is..... well.... Hurr durr durr... :P
 
I posted this seeking peers who've experienced the same thing or have some common understanding of what it's like to struggle with this shit and be deaf/hoh, not just getting scared over a simple touch. This is different, there's more to it than that. I was hoping someone could relate like What did, thank you for that. Yes, I've sought professional help because my life was spiraling downwards, upwards, backwards, out of control and honestly that didn't work out too well for me. Nobody at work knows about it, and I'm just hoping it can stay that way. Shit, hardly any of them know I'm deaf/hoh. I'm also sorry you had to go through something traumatic What, and I hope things have gotten better for you. I really do.

Horus is a friend, I would appreciate it if you wouldn't try to belittle him. That's not cool with me. I think he understood more of what I was trying to say, yet poorly executed here on this post. Your first comment Mew, even put me off a tad. I don't want this to turn into an argument. Although I did focus more on the touching triggers, it really is more than that. Learning how others in this community cope with the same or similar thing is what I was trying to get at. Now I've learned my lesson about trying to reach out to others thinking someone would understand, in a community I'm working on opening myself up to, and this site/internet obviously isn't the right place and I feel really ****ing stupid for this.

Thanks to those who had a genuine input, I appreciate it. Have a good night all.
 
No reason to feel stupid at all. Many people have PTSD for varying reasons. I personally don't and cannot relate which is why I haven't replied.

And you know how the internet is. Conversations on the forums go into different directions - it's normal. Stay in there, you might find a couple of people that can relate. I can think of a few but again it's not appropriate of me to be pointing fingers and telling them to come in here to discuss. I hope they see the conversation and leave their thoughts.

Hang in there.
 
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