Deaf etiquette question?

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Samorjj

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I am hearing, and am friends with a woman (and her husband) that are both deaf. Both read lips; neither is verbal to the point of having an easy conversation with a hearing person. When the woman and I get together, we sign. I know my signing isn't very good, but I can keep up a conversation (though I am sure my grammar is atrocious).

My question.... I have been out with them where a majority of the people were Deaf. I sign as best I can and almost everyone is kind enough to slow a bit to ensure I understand. Now I am having people over for dinner and they will be the only Deaf people in a room full of people that don't sign. Is it appropriate to have a few pads of paper and pens randomly about in case they are needed/ wanted or would this be considered rude/ disrespectful?

Thanks for the input
 
Well, that would be a difficult answer to your questions about communication among the hearing and Deaf people for dinner. If the people who are either deaf nor hearing don't sign, then it might take time consuming to write down on notepads and pens. I don't think it is rude to use notepad and pen to write down for communication.

I think it is normally the way we want to sign like in the Deaf community to make conversations. We are comfortable signing without the notepads and pens.

Maybe you can use separate dinners on different dates so that no one don't have to bother using notepads and pen. Mixed with speaking and signing can be complicate if a Deaf person understand while the others could not understand signs. This is my opinion on that. I hope others here can jump into the discussions.
 
Thanks Bebonang. Yes, I also hope to hear from others too.
The dinner is an open house style. Posted to all friends and those who would like to come would accept. She wants to come and is aware that she is the only Deaf person I know. Her friends were quite accepting of me and made an effort to chat with me, though I am by no means fluent in ASL.
So if you wanted to come to the dinner, and knew that almost everyone was hearing and unable to sign, would you appreciate some casually placed notepads around so you could use them if needed? Or would this offend you?
 
A quick comment while my breakfast muffin is toasting. I am very HOH and appreciate the use of pen/pencil and paper. It does not have to be long written comment as often it is just a key word that is not understood and needs to be written down.
 
I think it would be great to have notepads. Not everybody thinks of it.
 
Bottesini said:
I think it would be great to have notepads. Not everybody thinks of it.
Click to expand...

And just because they are there does not mean that they have to be used if a given conversation is going well without using one.
 
I think asking for your friends input is good too, some times an app on a phone can be used, voice to text followed by text to voice. I am sure if your friend accepted the invite knowing they would be the only deaf people that they have been to a hearing party.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-N900A using AllDeaf App mobile app
 
Pen and paper may be better than the apps for voice to text/vice versa because I don't think in an environment like that it would work well- too noisy. I nth the suggestion to ask if they're ok with it but I don't see the harm in it. I've been to places/events where they either give out pads of paper & pen (in an event) or there are some on tables.
 
Your right deafducky I didn't think about the background noise. So maybe pen and paper is the best idea

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-N900A using AllDeaf App mobile app
 
They be well used being in social circle as only deafie,why don't you ask them as they may well know how to get around it..Don't stress it makes it awkward.enjoy dinner party lets know how it went
 
I don't like separating deaf from hearies, and although I do understand the motive behind it, to me it it sounds somewhat "racist".
I would leave pens and paper everywhere, and let people do whatever they wish to do.

They'll either create their own alike circles or will happily mix. Either way, their own choice.

Fuzzy
 
Audiofuzzy said:
I don't like separating deaf from hearies, and although I do understand the motive behind it, to me it it sounds somewhat "racist".
I would leave pens and paper everywhere, and let people do whatever they wish to do.

They'll either create their own alike circles or will happily mix. Either way, their own choice.

Fuzzy
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And people wonder why deaf community stick together you so right auto fuzzy.Everyone feels awkward with deafie.we don't bite
 
Not everyone. furthermore, even if - it's mostly at first.
Besides, all people, hearing or not, if they do not know each other they feel awkward at first. but once they get to know each other ...

Fuzzy
 
It sucks that many deaf people don't accept note pads at table. I don't mind if others bring note pads to table.
 
dereksbicycles said:
It sucks that many deaf people don't accept note pads at table. I don't mind if others bring note pads to table.
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Could be those who don't, simply don't know how to spell or outright write/ read.

It did happen to me that one seller at the store refused to write down what he said because he "didn't know how to spell this word". so there...

Fuzzy
 
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