Deaf Couple?

nana_tech

nana_tech

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I've never been with someone who is hearing impaired like myself. All of my guy friends can pretty much hear, but I keep it away from them that I cannot. I think I want to try something new with someone I can feel compatible with. Someone who is striving for greatness and take they're future seriously and doesn't let their impairment stop them from doing what they want to do. I don't want to feel like I cannot be real with the person I'm with. :)
 
Why would you keep it away from them? That only makes it harder on you and, ultimately, everyone else. When people have to repeat, and not understand why?

Be yourself. Tell them straight-up. If they reject you for your hearing loss, then they're not worth being with.
 
It's not as easy as you think, especially where I'm from. We get criticized badly and laughed at. I figure if I trust them enough and feel I'm deep with them I'll tell them at my own time.
 
nana_tech said:
It's not as easy as you think, especially where I'm from. We get criticized badly and laughed at. I figure if I trust them enough and feel I'm deep with them I'll tell them at my own time.
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Are you from India?

And I guess you are not deaf, but hard of hearing?
 
If you are getting criticized and laughed at, they are not your friends.

It is not easy finding people you want to date like yourself. I hope that works out for you.
 
No I am not from India and none of the people I am mentioning are my friends. Also I am not completely deaf, I'm just hard of hearing. When I say hard I mean seriously HARD of hearing
 
nana_tech said:
No I am not from India and none of the people I am mentioning are my friends. Also I am not completely deaf, I'm just hard of hearing. When I say hard I mean seriously HARD of hearing
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Well, then where are you from? You have a lot to learn about Deaf Culture and please don't use the word "hearing impaired". That word is offensive. Just choose what you want to be call like "Hard Of Hearing (HOH)" or deaf (only speak oral) or Deaf (sign language user).

You did not mention how old are you? Finding a boyfriend is not that easy and just have to let the boy get interest in you first. If you are thinking of finding a d/Deaf man to keep you company, then that take effort (try) to look for one. Hardly will you be able to find a deaf or hard of hearing man in the hearing society. All you can do is find a group like a Deaf club or Deaf event. I really don't know where you are from so you need to tell us where you are from.

You need to be with friends whether hearing or deaf, not to laugh or poke fun at you. But be able to trust friends. They are not your friends if they are making fun of your hearing loss. Drop them like hotcakes. Walk away from them.
 
Bebonang said:
You have a lot to learn about Deaf Culture and please don't use the word "hearing impaired". That word is offensive. Just choose what you want to be call like "Hard Of Hearing (HOH)" or deaf (only speak oral) or Deaf (sign language user).
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Not to hijack the thread, but the comment that using "hearing impaired" is offensive is just an opinion. There are people who don't find it offensive and use the term to describe their hearing ability or lack thereof. Just because someone says it's offensive in an online forum doesn't mean it is to everybody. Just don't want the OP to think she can't use the term if she wants to describe herself that way.

By the way to Bebonang, if you tell someone you are "d/Deaf" how do you distinguish between "Deaf" and "deaf"? They're the same word.
 
Rogus said:
By the way to Bebonang, if you tell someone you are "d/Deaf" how do you distinguish between "Deaf" and "deaf"? They're the same word.
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Not in writing they aren't. And if you are doing it in person, it's going to be glaringly obvious if you are and ASL user or oral deaf...
 
And I think i should add that yes, a preponderance of d/Deaf people do consider "hearing impaired" offensive.
 
I can't even imagine HOW you could play off like you aren't HoH. It's going to become obvious at some point. No it might not be as glaringly obvious as someone who's deaf, but with enough exposure to someone they're going to catch on that there's something going on.
 
Rogus said:
By the way to Bebonang, if you tell someone you are "d/Deaf" how do you distinguish between "Deaf" and "deaf"? They're the same word.
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I'll be a little helpful. I'm deaf, but I'm not Deaf.

Big D signifies cultural Deaf.... They use ASL. Little deaf is just audiologically deaf.
 
Bottesini said:
Not in writing they aren't. And if you are doing it in person, it's going to be glaringly obvious if you are and ASL user or oral deaf...
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What if you're both an ASL user and oral deaf? One can be both.

Bottesini said:
And I think i should add that yes, a preponderance of d/Deaf people do consider "hearing impaired" offensive.
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I wasn't making any assertion about percentages. Some d/Deaf are not offended by it's usage and if you're using it to describe yourself then, in my opinion, no one should be offended.
 
Yes you CAN be d/Deaf, but if you were you'd just use Deaf. AND you can be one or the other so insisting that it's the same thing is silly. It's not the same thing.

Wait I'm gonna let Bottesini do this. It will be more fun :) never mind me, carry on
 
ambrosia said:
I'll be a little helpful. I'm deaf, but I'm not Deaf.

Big D signifies cultural Deaf.... They use ASL. Little deaf is just audiologically deaf.
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I know the difference. I was asking Bebonang how she (don't recall the proper gender) conveys the difference to someone when telling them what she wants to be called.
 
ambrosia said:
Yes you CAN be d/Deaf, but if you were you'd just use Deaf. AND you can be one or the other so insisting that it's the same thing is silly. It's not the same thing.

Wait I'm gonna let Bottesini do this. It will be more fun :) never mind me, carry on
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I kind of have a stomach virus..

So I am tired. You can be in charge!
 
Well if she's doing it I person she'd being signing it so.......bit self explanatory. If she was describing herself on say, a forum she'd use the applicable d, which in her case is D.

I hadn't read all the posts, so I missed that you already knew. It just seems a strange question to ask if you do already know the difference between Deaf and deaf. I didn't know the difference until I joined this forum. I'd had 0 exposure to Deaf culture, this is STILL my only exposure to Deaf culture.

I think the level of offensiveness of the term hearing impaired to a person is directly correlated to how involved in the hearing vs Deaf worlds a person is. I'm late-deafened and the term doesn't bother me, I think some oral deaf aren't bothered with it.....now I'm wondering if it's more the late deafened people that don't find it offensive. Now I never USE it to describe myself but if someone else did I wouldn't care.

This thread has been properly derailed.
 
*most* of the Deaf people I've met personally <including my Deaf teachers> find "hearing impaired" very offensive or at generally disagree with it.

Botti, hope your virus goes away soon!

now I suppose I've derailed the original derailing
next.....
 
ok, I really like what AC and others wrote about being yourself.

is this something happening at work?
 
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