Counseling

ClearSky

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What's your opinion of it based on your experience?

I think they can be helpful with the right person if you sense a change in you that's helping you, but I think some counselors don't help at all or sound like a textbook telling you things you already know.
 
i've had mental health services since the early 90s, so i'm very familiar and comfortable with the idea of counseling.

however, i know counseling isn't appropriate for everyone since some people don't like talking to strangers or have had negative experiences with counselors in the past.

two important things to consider when it comes to counseling is finding a counselor you feel comfortable with and thinking about the kind of therapy that would be most helpful to you.

counselors can range from marriage and family counselors to licensed clinical social workers to psychiatrists.

there are various kinds of therapy such as group, individual, cbt (cognitive behavioral therapy) and dbt (dialectical behavioral therapy). different types of therapy work better for some than others which is why it's important to establish what kind of therapy works best for you.

it's also important that if you don't find a counselor you're comfortable with to keep searching until you do. after all, counseling won't work unless you and your counselor are able to establish a relationship based on trust.
 
I think that counseling is like school. The class depends completely on the teacher. Likewise, counseling depends completely on the counselor.
 
I think that counseling is like school. The class depends completely on the teacher. Likewise, counseling depends completely on the counselor.

that's an excellent analogy and summation, nika.
 
that's an excellent analogy and summation, nika.

Thanks. I've been in the school and mental health systems for awhile now. <laugh>

For two things that are so incompatible, they sure have a lot in common in the way they work.
 
Back to counseling...

I think counseling can be excellent if you find a very good therapist that specializes in your area. This is crucial--a therapist who doesn't understand your specific condition can actually do more harm than good. I have been caught in this situation many times.

Another system I have realized is it's worth the extra money to try several therapists for a few sessions and then pick the best. Sometimes you don't realize how awful your therapist is if you have no frame of comparison, whereas when choosing among two or three, you have a frame of comparison that allows you to choose the most suitable one for you.
 
I was lucky to find a great therapist who helped me with my issues of my identity confusion, self-esteem, and the failure of my first marriage. My daughter had counseling too to help with the divorce and she is now happy and well-adjusted. Having said that, my experience with counselors has been positive.
 
Back to counseling...

I think counseling can be excellent if you find a very good therapist that specializes in your area. This is crucial--a therapist who doesn't understand your specific condition can actually do more harm than good. I have been caught in this situation many times.

Another system I have realized is it's worth the extra money to try several therapists for a few sessions and then pick the best. Sometimes you don't realize how awful your therapist is if you have no frame of comparison, whereas when choosing among two or three, you have a frame of comparison that allows you to choose the most suitable one for you.

as usual, excellent advice, nika.

this is slightly off-topic, but it still applies to this thread. i worked with my last psychiatrist for over a year and a half. after being dissatisfied with my treatment and not getting any results, i saw 3 other psychiatrists and selected the one i felt most comfortable with. when i called up each clinic for the name of a pdoc, i requested that they have experience in addiction and bipolar (addiction because i've noticed that psychiatrists who specialize in this area are quite knowledgeable about other aspects of mental illness. they also tend to be more compassionate and understanding when med treatments don't work and thus are persistent when it comes to finding one that does.).

as for finding a therapist who specializes in your area, this is also important. my current therapist doesn't specialize in bipolar, but he does know *alot* about it even though i am his only client with the disorder. together we've worked on educating myself about my illness as well as other issues i need to address. i was lucky and struck gold the first time around, but when my current therapist is no longer practicing (or moves to a different office location that i can't get to), i will look for another therapist who has experience with bipolar. having said that, if i find a therapist who has experience in this area, but i do not feel comfortable with him or her, i'd rather find a therapist who i do feel comfortable with. even if a therapist does not have experience in a given area, it does not mean that they are unwilling to learn or be open minded.

now that i've looked over what i've just written, i guess i'm contradicting myself. my advice would be that if you can find a therapist who has experience in a given area *and* you feel comfortable with them, great. if you find a therapist who has experience in a given area but you do not feel comfortable with them, then it's time to find another.
 
therapy does help

i went in for weekly therapy as i am still in therapy as i am still dealing with my depression and fear anxiety of things.
had been in therapy for 2 years almost i first went in after my EX broke up with me and i was so depressed.
and therapy does help me
 
hi,

this is the way i see it from a counselor's perspective:

counseling will only work if the client has the 'readiness' and 'willingness' to make changes in their lives. i have noticed some clients are 'mandated' to go to counseling (for example, court order to get clean, or to get their kids back) and i find counseling to be ineffective for these type of clients because they didn't sign up for the services on a voluntary basis. it is my strong belief that clients need to be motivated, and have the willingness and readiness to make changes in their lives, for counseling to be effective.

also, i remember someone told me, "finding counselors are like trying on shoes. you have to keep trying different counselors until you find the perfect fit....just like shoes".

missy
 
hi,

this is the way i see it from a counselor's perspective:

counseling will only work if the client has the 'readiness' and 'willingness' to make changes in their lives. i have noticed some clients are 'mandated' to go to counseling (for example, court order to get clean, or to get their kids back) and i find counseling to be ineffective for these type of clients because they didn't sign up for the services on a voluntary basis. it is my strong belief that clients need to be motivated, and have the willingness and readiness to make changes in their lives, for counseling to be effective.

also, i remember someone told me, "finding counselors are like trying on shoes. you have to keep trying different counselors until you find the perfect fit....just like shoes".

missy


Yea...like the saying goes "You cant be helped unless u are ready to be helped." Something like that...
 
hi,

this is the way i see it from a counselor's perspective:

counseling will only work if the client has the 'readiness' and 'willingness' to make changes in their lives. i have noticed some clients are 'mandated' to go to counseling (for example, court order to get clean, or to get their kids back) and i find counseling to be ineffective for these type of clients because they didn't sign up for the services on a voluntary basis. it is my strong belief that clients need to be motivated, and have the willingness and readiness to make changes in their lives, for counseling to be effective.

also, i remember someone told me, "finding counselors are like trying on shoes. you have to keep trying different counselors until you find the perfect fit....just like shoes".

missy

i couldn't agree with you more, missy. if someone is forced into counseling by an external source, there is little chance of it working as intended.
 
The first two counselors I had new next to nothing about PTSD and ended up making fun of me for some of my symptoms. Another therapist I had completely glossed some information I gave him that I considered to be extremely important. These are examples of some red flags that pop up with some psychiatrists that after awhile you learn to notice.

I think it helps to be an assertive patient. For example, if a therapist is being too cautious or being too pushy, a patient can let them know. The pace of progress makes a huge difference in the outcome.

I wish the mental health system wasn't so expensive. So many people in this country can't afford to be ill. For example I decided to live with my parents instead of being hospitalized because of the sheer cost of hospitalization. People should be able to receive the treatment they need, no matter what their income.
 
Have you tried all the counselors in the same center?

Yeah, I understand sometimes counselors are rather strange for being counselors.
 
I have, but they tend to be of very similar philosophy and not different in a way I'm looking for. So now if I want to find someone new, I will go to another center.

How about you?
 
The first two counselors I had new next to nothing about PTSD and ended up making fun of me for some of my symptoms. Another therapist I had completely glossed some information I gave him that I considered to be extremely important. These are examples of some red flags that pop up with some psychiatrists that after awhile you learn to notice.

I think it helps to be an assertive patient. For example, if a therapist is being too cautious or being too pushy, a patient can let them know. The pace of progress makes a huge difference in the outcome.

I wish the mental health system wasn't so expensive. So many people in this country can't afford to be ill. For example I decided to live with my parents instead of being hospitalized because of the sheer cost of hospitalization. People should be able to receive the treatment they need, no matter what their income.

i agree. i think *all* forms of insurance should cover mental health services regardless of how much a person makes. having said that, i *am* glad that government programs like medicaid and medicare allow the poor, elderly and disabled to seek mental health treatment since mental illness tends to be higher among these populations.

there *are* free mental health clinics, but unfortunately, the services rendered in these facilities tends to be less than satisfactory. having said that, free mental health services are better than none. if a person needs meds to function, at least they can get a diagnosis as well as meds (if necessary and desired) instead of not getting the help they need.
 
CBT and DBT?

sorry! cbt means cognitive behavioral therapy and dbt means dialectical behavioral therapy.

cbt aims to change problematic (or dysfunctional) behaviors and emotions through a goal-oriented program.

dbt is primarily used for people who have borderline personality disorder or struggle with self-injury. the therapist and client discuss issues that come up during the week and follow a specific treatment plan. self-injurious and suicidal behaviors are discussed first followed by behaviors that may interfere with therapy. quality of life issues are also discussed and finally, steps towards working to improve one's life.
 
i forgot to mention that gestalt therapy is yet another kind of therapy practiced by counselors. gestalt therapy emphasizes personal responsibility and focuses on the client/therapist relationship as well as immediate situations that affect the client.
 
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