Children need be spank???

[KSUASL1214]

I think children should be spanked for misbehaving. I was spanked by my parents when I decided to misbehave. I do not have children, but I have seen a lot of children misbehave due to my job. The only problem is that now spectators get to involved and decide to take action into their own hands and call the authorities on the parents spanking the children in public. What has this world come to??

 

[KristinaB]

I also remember being spanked a lot as a child. Both with a yard stick and the razor-strop. That was rough. Most times I got it due to my brothers doing the deed, and my parents believed what was good for them was good for me. Made it a pain to be the baby and the only girl. There was a Christmas that my oldest brother talked us into opening the presents on Christmas night after bedtime and re-sealing them. Parents found out and we had to take all gifts to the shelter on Christmas Day for punishment. We didn't even get to keep our stocking treats. that was a Christmas to remember.

 

[sallylou]

People who do not have children always know how to rear them.

Kristina B, that's pretty harsh, especially for something that's a natural feeling--curiosity. I would have pretended not to have noticed and laughed behind my kid's back.

 

[webexplorer]

I also remember being spanked a lot as a child. Both with a yard stick and the razor-strop. That was rough. Most times I got it due to my brothers doing the deed, and my parents believed what was good for them was good for me. Made it a pain to be the baby and the only girl. There was a Christmas that my oldest brother talked us into opening the presents on Christmas night after bedtime and re-sealing them. Parents found out and we had to take all gifts to the shelter on Christmas Day for punishment. We didn't even get to keep our stocking treats. that was a Christmas to remember.

That's too cruel! I don't think that it's ok.

 

[Lissa]

I hated being spanked, it was usually done by the hand by my father. My mother didnt do it. I was spanked a lot more than my brother and sister, I guess I was a lot more frustrated than they were and struggled to communicate my feelings. I was a naughty child too

But spankings are not necessary, time-outs and explanations should work

 

[shel90]

This morning, my son had a full blown temper tantrum because he didnt want to wear his jacket. It was 36 degrees out. I had to leave the house by 7 to make it to work on time since I had to drop him off and then traffic. So, he was kicking and screaming and I was trying to use a firm tone with him. Didnt work..put him in time out, didnt work, and threatened to take his puppy away..didnt work. It was 7:20 by then. So, I spanked him and told him to get up. It worked. In situations like these I will use spanking if nothing else worked or when I needed him to stop throwing a fit so I could make it to work on time. One spank took care of the situation. I would rather not spank but if nothing else works, what can a parent do?

 

[sallylou]

I would have taken him without a jacket. If he really gets cold, he'll put it on. Or throw a blanket around him. My kid was a nudist for the first 4 years of his life and I learned to adjust. Do whatever works for you.

 

[shel90]

I would have taken him without a jacket. If he really gets cold, he'll put it on. Or throw a blanket around him. My kid was a nudist for the first 4 years of his life and I learned to adjust. Do whatever works for you.

He gets sick easily and he just recovered from a nasty flu a month ago and my daughter just recovered from pneomonia. He has gone out without a jacket on cold days and doesnt complain but gets sick fast. He has asthma on top of that. I just am tired of everyone in this family getting sick.

One time, he took his shoes off in my SUV from a tantrum on the way home and he refused to pick them up so I stayed outside waiting for him to get tired of lying on the grass. Then he wanted to come in and I said no, not until you pick your shoes up. He finally gave up. Normally, I would do that but this morning, I could NOT be late to work.

However, if I did let him out without his jacket wouldnt that send him a message that by having a tantrum, he would get his way?

 

[sallylou]

Ya'll have had more than your share of illness lately. That makes everyone tired and more prone to get upset. Not a good situation!

I'm not saying that you should let him have his way all of the time. I just believe in picking your battles carefully. If you can avoid a power struggle, it's better but sometimes you can't. He'll out grow this soon enough and you'll be dealing with a moody teen. Does that make you feel better? Just kidding.

 

[shel90]

Ya'll have had more than your share of illness lately. That makes everyone tired and more prone to get upset. Not a good situation!

I'm not saying that you should let him have his way all of the time. I just believe in picking your battles carefully. If you can avoid a power struggle, it's better but sometimes you can't. He'll out grow this soon enough and you'll be dealing with a moody teen. Does that make you feel better? Just kidding.

I did the same to my daughter when she was that age but around 5, I stopped as she developed enough language and understanding of the consequences better. My son is very very stubborn and his tantrums can really last for over an hour if I let them. This am, I just couldnt and I couldnt pick him up when he was kicking or hitting because he is very very big and strong for his age.

I am dealing with a moody teen now..my 12 year old daughter. LOL!~

 

[sallylou]

My eldest, now 15, was like your son when he was young. Such a temper and so stubborn! He's a great kid now. He still has his own mind, which is a good thing. He doesn't follow the crowd. LOL!

I hear that teen age girls are hard. At least, that's according to my friends with teen daughters. I don't have a girl so I don't know. I miss out on all of the fun girl stuff. Puberty and periomenopause at the same time, I'm ok with missing that.

 

[somedeafdudefromPNW]

Mmm....

I talked to my mom about how my grandmother raised her family last night. They used corporal punishment until they were 12. No more than 3 hits a day, and no bruises, or it could progress into an abusive relationship.

Interesting insight though...

 

[KristinaB]

My eldest, now 15, was like your son when he was young. Such a temper and so stubborn! He's a great kid now. He still has his own mind, which is a good thing. He doesn't follow the crowd. LOL!

I hear that teen age girls are hard. At least, that's according to my friends with teen daughters. I don't have a girl so I don't know. I miss out on all of the fun girl stuff. Puberty and periomenopause at the same time, I'm ok with missing that.

With my daughter, it has been mostly easy, but she is a real homebody. Hates to go anywhere. She is 15. all private stuff came about smoothly, but we had also prepared early. The American Girl series of books have a little book called "All About Me" that really helped.

My son still has his tempers, but they have finally calmed for the most part. When we were in Missouri we had a mobile home and let's just say, his bedroom was without walls. He had kicked and punched them out even after we replaced tham. It was easier to go without. Where we are now in MIL's house, he knows he can't do that. Also, the house is built with concrete and rebar reinforced concrete blocks. Hurricane proof for the most part.

 

[Jdtruly]

Correctly done, disciplinary spanking is not violent or abusive. Never use your hand. Use a flat paddle-we often used a wooden cooking spoon (makes a louder sound with a lesser swat). Make sure what the child did and why it's wrong (rebellion to parental authority is the main thing). Use just enough to get their attention. Then hug them, express your care for them and explain why they were spanked and how to avoid it in the future.

Using these principles, we spanked our kids no more than three total times each and did not have many discipline problems. They have grown to be successful well adjusted adults and good parents themselves.

 

[Cheri]

However, if I did let him out without his jacket wouldnt that send him a message that by having a tantrum, he would get his way?

Yea because temper tantrums are meant to get your attention, even if you let your son go outside without a jacket, you are given him what he wants, your undivided attention. This will only make the behavior more likely to occur again in the future.

Ignoring your son's demands is often a very effective way to end a tantrum to prevent future ones.

 

[shel90]

Yea because temper tantrums are meant to get your attention, even if you let your son go outside without a jacket, you are given him what he wants, your undivided attention. This will only make the behavior more likely to occur again in the future.

Ignoring your son's demands is often a very effective way to end a tantrum to prevent future ones.

I agree...

I usually ignore them but that morning, I had to leave and I was already 20 mins late. If I didnt need to go anywhere on time, sure I would have waited it out which I normally do. I just couldnt be late for work yesterday due to a meeting with my student's parents before the kids arrive. Ugh..it was a day that I needed help from my hubby and brother but they had already left.

 

[Cheri]

I agree...

I usually ignore them but that morning, I had to leave and I was already 20 mins late. If I didnt need to go anywhere on time, sure I would have waited it out which I normally do. I just couldnt be late for work yesterday due to a meeting with my student's parents before the kids arrive. Ugh..it was a day that I needed help from my hubby and brother but they had already left.

Yea, I know how much of a headache that can be when trying to cope with a temper tantrum before going to work. You did the right thing, you didn't give in, you showed him that you're the boss and what you say goes. If spanking did worked, then it works.