It seems to me that the one sure way to NOT get hearing parents on board with a particular way of educating their deaf children is to bully and insult them with a superior air, while criticizing their choices and opinions.
Deaf educators and parents should be working as a team to get the best results for the children. How does all this I'm-a-professional vs. I'm-a-parent help the kids?
Also, who says that one particular "program" or method is best for each and every deaf child? Each child is an individual with different learning abilities and modes of learning (tactile vs. auditory vs. visual, etc.). The age which they became deaf, and to what degree is variable. There is no one-size-fits-all solution.
Creating a wall between "us" and "them" doesn't benefit anyone, much less the child who is treated as a bystander to all this bickering.
I agree with you. I just wish that myth of using ASL is bad for a deaf child who is learning to speak would just go away.