C
Cookie Monster
Guest
Do you realise that a pat on the back is only a few inches higher than a kick on the ass? Bullying isn't something a person should endure.
A bully can be so cunning and manipulative, sometimes the bully may not realise it as it can be a brain chemical imbalance or a learned behaviour while growing up from other peers but that does not justify the bullying. One must own up to one's behaviour. Angel explained the perfect feelings of the "inner child conditioning". Some of us may or may not have that and the "inner child conditioning" takes a lot of energy to battle with. Usually the "inner child conditioning", we take into our adult years because we feel the need to soothe our "inner child" during major conflicts ie. an aggressive situation.
Bullying is an aggressive situation. We feel trapped, hence, our "inner child conditioning" comes out. We feel the need to protect the "inner child" and we will wave the "peace flag" or the "white flag" or extend the "olive branch" however you call it during the bullying when we know we did nothing wrong. We were just backed up in the corner psychologically, we lash out, say comments we do not mean and in the end result, we say "Stop, time out or enough! Peace, you win!" The bully wins and he/she feels good, gloats about it and moves on to the next victim.
Do we feel good? No! We did not own up to our approach, we could have told our bully that his/her behaviour was unacceptable but we cannot blame our "inner child conditioning" as the bully is smart. The bully knows how to work their ways through our "inner child conditioning".
http://www.crystallotus.com/Synthesis/04.htm - Inner Child Conditioning
You can use "comebacks" for your bully(ies) from this link and I thank a good friend for this link.
http://www.bullyonline.org/action/words.htm - Comebacks
With a bully(ies), you always need to be well prepared with a good comeback and don't look back at the bully, period. Just say your comeback and walk away. Hold your head up high and you have your strong character. You do not want to be hooked by your bully's bait. It'd be instant "Hook, Line and Sinker!" for him/her.
*sending positive healing thoughts to all of you who are struggling with your bullies*
^Angel^ said:I've been stuck into a situation where this bully will not let go and it's been going around so long, sometimes I asked myself what did I do to this person...it's like there is no end to it even when I have waved the peace flag over and over...
A bully can be so cunning and manipulative, sometimes the bully may not realise it as it can be a brain chemical imbalance or a learned behaviour while growing up from other peers but that does not justify the bullying. One must own up to one's behaviour. Angel explained the perfect feelings of the "inner child conditioning". Some of us may or may not have that and the "inner child conditioning" takes a lot of energy to battle with. Usually the "inner child conditioning", we take into our adult years because we feel the need to soothe our "inner child" during major conflicts ie. an aggressive situation.
Bullying is an aggressive situation. We feel trapped, hence, our "inner child conditioning" comes out. We feel the need to protect the "inner child" and we will wave the "peace flag" or the "white flag" or extend the "olive branch" however you call it during the bullying when we know we did nothing wrong. We were just backed up in the corner psychologically, we lash out, say comments we do not mean and in the end result, we say "Stop, time out or enough! Peace, you win!" The bully wins and he/she feels good, gloats about it and moves on to the next victim.
Do we feel good? No! We did not own up to our approach, we could have told our bully that his/her behaviour was unacceptable but we cannot blame our "inner child conditioning" as the bully is smart. The bully knows how to work their ways through our "inner child conditioning".
http://www.crystallotus.com/Synthesis/04.htm - Inner Child Conditioning
You can use "comebacks" for your bully(ies) from this link and I thank a good friend for this link.
http://www.bullyonline.org/action/words.htm - Comebacks
With a bully(ies), you always need to be well prepared with a good comeback and don't look back at the bully, period. Just say your comeback and walk away. Hold your head up high and you have your strong character. You do not want to be hooked by your bully's bait. It'd be instant "Hook, Line and Sinker!" for him/her.
*sending positive healing thoughts to all of you who are struggling with your bullies*
TOF
, I am glad that you can see and clearly understand my POV, and I'm also learning to ignore certain posts by walking away from it or go to another thread as I've been doing lately.....doing so and if everyone could also, we would see less control and bullying across the board...I know this isn't easy to do for some but not entirely impossible...
With patience and persistence, we all can do it. We can ignore the petty bickering, blantant ignorance, veiled insults and the bullying. It just takes time and group effort in order to do this. It is so important not to be "Hook, Line and Sinker!" for the bully. Just turn the cheek and walk away and wouldn't you know it, the bully realises he/she has wasted his/her time and effort while you feel incredibly redempted with your accomplishments.