Between you and your Deaf relative experience...

katz4life

katz4life

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Since you are d/Deaf and ASL user and have one or more relative d/Deaf who is also ASL user. It could be your niece, nephew, sister, brother, 1st and 2nd cousins, aunt, or uncle.

When there is family suppertime together on holidays like Christmas and family reunion or meetings, one of your d/Deaf relatives and is sign language user but s/he starts speaking without signing with other people in front of you...how do you feel?? I would be surprised to see if someone to call it Deaf Audist or Deaf Audism!!

It did happen to me out of a blue when my Deaf brother speaking without ASL to my mother during Easter's at the table, boy, it really pissed me off for big time. I knew it he didn't want me to know what he was saying in a conversation with my mother and of course the others in my family could hear his talking but me. It caused me to spoil the drama fight over the table because of him so my mother told him to stop and use signing while he was speaking in front of me! My mother knows my hot-temper way if someone in my family offend me in disrespectful audist way. But my DEAF brother, oh my god! Grrrr. My bf would NOT like that either! Of course, my bf doesn't like him at all.

Wonder does it happen to you?
 
I do not have any deaf relatives in my family or relatives. I had no idea that your brother do speak. Needless to say, that I know him personally that he does it to you all the time that I am trying to understand why.
 
Not all the time...he does speaking to my siblings and my mother with his hand covered his mouth at times...in front of me.
 
My Deaf brother has absulotely no speech skills. If anything, it would be a problem for him because sometimes I did that by accident. However, growing up, I didn't know any ASL so yea, I am sure he was feeling bitter towards me for refusing to learn ASL and chatting with family members. He was soooo THRILLED when I finally learned it.
 
F.u.c.k.i.n' Wow....I thought you and your brother grew up using the same method - oralism without ASL. Boy, I am wrong.
 
katz4life said:
Not all the time...he does speaking to my siblings and my mother with his hand covered his mouth at times...in front of me.
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gosh. When I was a kid and told him that it's so nice to have a little deaf sister around in the family. Apparently he did not catch what I was trying to tell him that. :|
 
I have a deaf older sister. we were both oral only. That's because we both were raised in a hearing household. my older sister loves to compare her speech, hearing, writing to me to make her look like she is smarter than me because she can act more like a hearing person (she made me feel like I'm the dumb one because I can't reach the same hearing standard as she) . It pisses me off too. Since I had CI and she doesn't and everyone is going around telling her how impress they are with my hearing. This is when she decided to join the deaf culture and learn ASL. another reason because she tried find jobs and she realize she is not qualify anywhere without telephone skills. We are friends now. but yeah, he should know better because he is deaf himself.
 
deafgal001 said:
I have a deaf older sister. we were both oral only. That's because we both were raised in a hearing household. my older sister loves to compare her speech, hearing, writing to me to make her look like she is smarter than me because she can act more like a hearing person. It pisses me off too. Since I had CI and she doesn't and everyone is going around telling her how impress they are with my hearing now. This is when she decided to join the deaf culture and learn ASL. another reason because she tried find jobs and she realize she is not qualify anywhere without telephone skills. We are friends now. but yeah, he should know better because he is deaf himself.
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I am sorry if i lost you. you said, she and then he.
 
Frisky Feline said:
gosh. When I was a kid and told him that it's so nice to have a little deaf sister around in the family. Apparently he did not catch what I was trying to tell him that. :|
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Well, it's kind of a little hard to explain. All I can say easily is that he's probably a mental and I have a strong feeling that he's not 100% proud to be Deaf. Almost always seen his eccentric behavior throughout the years. In the past, he used to be an-okay social at deaf events and socialized a lot with deaf freinds but now he's avoidin pretty much from deaf events an deaf friends. Something is really wrong with him. Oh well. I usually get negative complaints "reports" from deaf peers over him when I'm visiting in town. *smh* Just like the recent incident at the deaf event - Deaf Fest in NYC last month.
 
I know. He was the one who told me that why did I go to the crappy deaf school. I told him that I was happy there. :aw:
 
deafgal001 said:
I have a deaf older sister. we were both oral only. That's because we both were raised in a hearing household. my older sister loves to compare her speech, hearing, writing to me to make her look like she is smarter than me because she can act more like a hearing person (she made me feel like I'm the dumb one because I can't reach the same hearing standard as she) . It pisses me off too. Since I had CI and she doesn't and everyone is going around telling her how impress they are with my hearing. This is when she decided to join the deaf culture and learn ASL. another reason because she tried find jobs and she realize she is not qualify anywhere without telephone skills. We are friends now. but yeah, he should know better because he is deaf himself.
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Our family is rest hearing except me and my brother. My brother and I grew up using the very same method of communication - SEE, PSE, and ASL. However, after I live on my own for 7 years, my ASL got stronger and stronger. In fact, my brother has more hearing loss than mine and has better English skills than I and probably is better at lipreading and speakin than I do. I'd say that he's a "hearing minded" for sure. But interestingly, his IQ score is lower than mine. =X Of course, there is a lot of opposite of us - he has a lot of job experiences but isn't well-liked and doesn't have many friends, not very good at ASL, of course he doesn't want to have a deaf girlfriend but no hearing woman wants him either way. And I have many friends, great in ASL, and has strong heart and stand up a lot rather than being passive like he is. *rme* I was never looking for a competition with him. Nonsense. But he is actin like trying to be better than me and it's never necessary! I let him wasting his "competition for nothing. I am still laid-back for a very long time.... he's too weird anyway anbd probably paranoid as well. Lol. The only thing he gets me pissed really bad is his pathological lies. Ugh.
 
Frisky Feline said:
I know. He was the one who told me that why did I go to the crappy deaf school. I told him that I was happy there. :aw:
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One deaf lady that used to work with him at the same newspaper company (you know who I'm talkin about) she went to Deaf Fest and saw him at the ZVRS booth and tried to say hello to him and noticed him acted like he doesn't know her. She stated it on her Facebook. Lol.

I mean, she's on his FB friends list. Wtf.
 
LOL!

well, I do not know if it does affect your brother's attitude by your older brother that he did comment so nasty about hearing issue when we were all little kids. But I can't assume about it.
 
Naw, not really. They still talk to one another. He acts nice to him. Doesn't treat him that bad nowadays. It doesn't make sense so it had nothing to do with coming from him.
 
Don't forget that the other brother has one deaf ear. Same as Rob Lowe. Pretty fucked up, isn't it? Like Hitler hated Jews and ironically, he was 1/8 Jew.
 
Oh really! wow about your other brother. Guess your deaf brother made the choice of living the way it is. :|
 
Well, he's trying to hide it....i don't give a damn i keep telling the others that he's actually partially deaf in one ear. 60 percent hearin loss in the right ear, probably. He lost it from hearing to the blaring, blasting music with his headphons on all the time in his younger times. If he hates deaf people, then he should not take an advantage in knowledge of ASL.
 
I think it is because they really hate being treated the way they are being treated. For example, my younger hearing sister and I go to same public school and she watched how everyone mocked and made fun of me. She didn't like what she was seeing and she definitely didn't like being humiliated because she have a deaf sister. So her reaction to this was to more preppy-like, and get involve in sports, and made mom buy expensive clothing even though mom really can't afford it. It did ease off the mocking but not completely, but I became as "one of the popular girl in school's sister" instead of her being "that deaf girl's sister" So I'm assuming since your older brother is deaf in one ear, this is just his reaction and all rooted on how people treat and view deaf people in general and he didn't want any associate with that. That's just my guess.
He should join you and fight Audism with you instead joining them who gave him problems in the first place, IF that's the case.
 
Hmm, damnit i should ask my mother wherebout his hearing evalution report. It must be 20 years ago or something. But i suspect he threw it away. =/
 
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