Am I doing wrong thing or...

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WhisperHorse

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right thing...?

I dated with a guy for awhile which I did likes him alot. He's wonderful guy and wonderful to my daughter, Alexanderia. He did say that he loves Alexanderia but.. he dumped me because I'm very request on things like.. I request him to sign language and speak at same time with Lexi, not just speaking but if just sign language I'm okay with it. Not speaking because I feel like that it's not fair to me. Also, I'm requesting him to sit down with me and lexi to eat dinner together but he wants to watch the tv which I forbid. Well, there's too many list that I do pretty much request him to do, say, etc during Lexi is around us. I just don't understand why he dumped me because Im very request person but, he loves Lexi and was very happy to having her and me in his life.

For your information; he's hard of hearing and know alot to sign but is VERY good at speaking and read the lips even he can hear things pretty good without the hearing aids/CI but his doctor says that he's deaf but I condiser him as hard of hearing.

Other thing; Lexi's father walked out on us, doubt that she's his.

So am I doing wrong or right or what?
 
I think only you can answer that, and decide how much you are willing to compromise on what you want.

If he won't do anything the way you want it, and it all has to be his way, he is probably wrong for you.
 
I'm sorry that it didn't quite work out for you. I was in a similar situation and it didn't work out for me. In fact, my ex-gf did want me to learn sign and I did that for her. When it comes to relationships, it's a give-and-take between the couple. If one is not willing to carry their own weight into the relationship, chances are it will fail no matter how hard the other will try. Like the saying goes, it takes two to tango.

As for the request part, that's really for you to determine. Botts is right as well.
 
There have been times when I would find myself "too demanding" of things...even little things would "tick me off."....Had to learn how not to sweat the little, itty, bitty things!

Hopefully, you do get child support....get an DNA! Ur baby is really cute and deserves the best.
 
Glad to see you around :wave: How's Lexi doing?!? I was kinda used to your monthly reports :giggle:

Anyway... I'm sorry that your relationship did end the way it did... A relationship isn't something easy and both have to make compromises. I have to agree with Bottesini's words because she said it so well!

And regarding what you wrote I just want to add that it is VERY important for me too to have dinner together as a family - not in front of TV! Enjoying each other's company, talking/signing, sharing stuff about daily life is important! And most of the time the only way you can do that is during dinner...
 
Yeah but, he got tired of me request alot from him. I told him that i can't help it because I want Lexi to having a best "family" for herself so I can see her happy with him but they do love each other, she always get excited once she hear from him on the phone. I could tell that he would be a great father if he decides to "adopt" her. But, he decided to leaving me because of my requests which it shows that he can't handle my requests. I just started to get tired of guys that they just couldn't handle me anymore. There's too many list to type down to tell what they got tired of me for...

Hello Jamie Lynn, I apology for not update lately. Too busy with my babygirl and everything like that. Lexi is doing great, very smart girl. Yesterday, she just learned to peeing in the potty and TODAY in around half hour ago or so, she just learned to poop in the potty. I'm so exicted with her but at same time, I will miss her as a newborn. =D

Thanks, Everybody.
 
I'm sorry that you had to go through this. I hope you will find someone else who is willing to listen to your suggestions/requests and give the best needs to your daughter. He is not worth your time because of a silly reason to break up. Just give some time until someone right comes a long in your life...:)

I don't think it's wrong of you to do that because it's a family thing to make Lexi happy and grow up with love and care.
 
WhisperHorse said:
Hello Jamie Lynn, I apology for not update lately. Too busy with my babygirl and everything like that. Lexi is doing great, very smart girl. Yesterday, she just learned to peeing in the potty and TODAY in around half hour ago or so, she just learned to poop in the potty. I'm so exicted with her but at same time, I will miss her as a newborn. =D

Thanks, Everybody.
Click to expand...

Thanks for the short "update" on Lexi! Wow!!!! Potty training's fun :giggle: Awww... I can understand you missing her as baby, but always think positive! And I'm not only talking about Lexi's growing... :cool2:
 
Hey

Your baby girl is absolutely gorgeous!!! I argee with everything that you said in your post. You as her mother have the right to ask him to sign when he speaks to your daughter so that you can know what he is saying!! I dont have any kids yet but that is exactly what I would do!! You are doing everything Right however you should get the baby's father on child support. I was raised by an single mother and she was AWESome and still is but it would have been a lot easier if my father did his duty!!!
 
sounds like you two have two different values. You find family dinner very important, I can understand being upset about him watching tv. Some things are on the top of the list, and family is one of it. believe me, don't expect him to stop watching tv during dinner. I think it is something he have always done and probably always will do.

Now the itty bitty thing should not be important and that is talking while signing. I would just let him communicate whichever works for him.
 
Hey, be glad that you didn't marry him, it's going to be hell to go through like that such as conflicting with opinions/personality. You guys were just dating, which is good experiment for relationship itself, if he can't stand the way you want him to do something you want, then he's not for you. I am sure that one day he will realize that you are right, and probably will walk to your door and ask you to re-consider/or apologize for his actions.
 
I agree with Lighthouse and Thonola. You both must have the same values and agree what's important. You deserve someone that will work with you on what you think is important. Maybe look for someone who is more family-oriented? I don't think that you're doing anything wrong. You did what was best for you and your beautiful baby.
 
Sounds like you have different values and beliefs and they are clashing. Nobody is right or wrong in this...just seems like maybe the both of you arent compatible for each other if a compromise isnt being worked out. Sometimes these things happen. I have been there before when I was dating different men. The most important thing is to do is follow YOUR heart and do what YOU think is right for you and Lexi.
 
I agreed that a couple needed to have same values
and beliefs of what's important for the family, life, and so on.
Otherwise it would make relationship run on a shaky ground.
I do not think you are too demanding. Don't worry, you will find
someone who supports what you think is right for your family.
 
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