Advice about remarks and jokes in the workplace...

Daredevel7 said:
For more information, it's a big workplace and we routinely take training for sexual/workplace harrassment. Hell, there's even a big notice on the door to the breakroom that talks about Workplace Harrassment/Violence.

So I am PRETTY sure training is pointless.

Now, I brought up to "Bob" the idea of talking to the offender directly. Bob believes that it won't make a difference since Bob has no "power" over him, only our boss. Knowing the offender somewhat personally through a close friend, he is very anti-gay. So I know he won't change his ways, only that he MAY stop doing it to Bob ONLY. However, if the boss tells him "Look, there's been complaints...." then he'd stop doing it to everyone... hopefully.

Here's the other thing.. I have a strong feeling that if Bob brings it up to the offender directly, the offender will be like "Um... okaaayyyy. It was just a joke, man... Lighten up." and sort of not taking it seriously. Which means Bob has only 2 choices, let it go, or threaten him with some sort of action and, to be honest, the action isn't even THAT serious in the first place to warrant a "threat"......

It's really amazing how the little things do make a big difference. A little flirt here ("Oh Im just being harmless! Its not sexual harrassment!"), a little racist/gay joke there ("It's just a little joke! I dont hate Mexicans!"). One can get away with so many things at work, really.
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Personally, I would report it, but whether or not you personally feel it is worth it is another thing. Re: your boss' religious beliefs...they can only be used to determine what HE believes is offensive and innappropriate to HIM, not to ANYONE ELSE. And certainly not regarding what is appropriate in the work place. Unless of course, you have recently changed work places and are employed in a church.

Isms are innappropriate and unnacceptable no matter how they are expressed. We may not be able to change some people's attitudes about these things, but neither do we have to sanction it by ignoring it.
 
Daredevel7 said:
Seriously!!! I understand if two coworkers became friends and things get a little "looser" in terms of joking around, etc. I became good friends with three of my coworkers and we say somewhat racist things, but not against others, only ourselves because we make fun of the stereotype of our own races/ethnicities (One Hispanic, one Indian, one Chinese and one White). But we never do it in front of others at work.

I don't even know why the hell the guy used the word queer. Who the hell says queer?!
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put out a $20 hit on mr. cool. :lol:

I'm gonna take a stab at it and predict that he is trolling on some forum or online community someplace. I've noticed of the people with witty/"modern day pwning" remarks are regulars of the internet. $5 says mr. cool hangs out someplace where he gets his jollies online.
 
Tousi and Naisho... You guys may be onto something. He gets paid quite a lot but doesn't even really do anything. It's one thing if you are the type of guy who just goes to meetings all day and don't do real work, and another thing if you just sit at your desk all day looking at tractor pictures or posting in tractor forums... And maybe trolling in other forums.... :)

I should get the boss to give him something to do....
 
I knew someone who used to make a lot of "gay" jokes until I told him that the more guys make anti-gay jokes, the more women think they're secretly gay.

That kinda made him shut up.
 
DeafCaroline said:
I knew someone who used to make a lot of "gay" jokes until I told him that the more guys make anti-gay jokes, the more women think they're secretly gay.

That kinda made him shut up.
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That actually may work on the offender...... he is very homophobic.
 
Beach girl said:
"Bro-dak?" I've never even heard the phrase.

For me, just speaking generally, if I'm offended by something, I'd take it up with the individual first. After that, if the individual continues to be offensive, take it up with the relevant authorities if necessary.
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:werd:

That sounds like an appropriate approach.
 
DeafCaroline said:
I knew someone who used to make a lot of "gay" jokes until I told him that the more guys make anti-gay jokes, the more women think they're secretly gay.

That kinda made him shut up.
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DeafCaroline said:
If you give him a knowing look like "your secret is safe with me" every time he makes a gay joke, have fun watching his reaction :)
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My workers never make gay jokes. :giggle:
 
Basically it's not sexual harassment until some one complains. Obvilously there are things that are clearly sexual harassment but I don't think this is. It is appropriate to approach the person and inform them that they are offended by the comments. If it continues, go to your boss and inform that you have already talked with the person and they persist. If it continues, go to HR and inform them of the situation, times, dates and details of what was said (as accurately as possible). If HR does their job, they will investigate, interview everyone. Make suggestions for more training, for management to be more vigilant, even to terminating employment.

I guess this is one benefit of being employed by such a large company (over 100,000 employees around the world). I have in the past make complaints that went up the chain like this.
 
Wirelessly posted (droid)

Sexual harassment involves a person who has some kind of power over the other person. That could be a performance review, authority to fire someone, control over salary or wages, etc. It's not clear to me that exists here.
 
sallylou said:
Wirelessly posted (droid)

Sexual harassment involves a person who has some kind of power over the other person. That could be a performance review, authority to fire someone, control over salary or wages, etc. It's not clear to me that exists here.
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it can also be a form of intimidation which is what this could become. This is why they need to be informed that their actions/words are offensive.
 
Wirelessly posted (droid)

Hostile work environment perhaps. Need evidence documented over time for that. Most people don't document evidence. I wish that people were better at that.
 
DeafCaroline said:
I knew someone who used to make a lot of "gay" jokes until I told him that the more guys make anti-gay jokes, the more women think they're secretly gay.

That kinda made him shut up.
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*SO* true!

I do not put up with crap like that from anyone. One of my close friends is gay, married and HIV +. Very protective of him and his community.

Maybe the complaint could be made annonymously?
 
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