adoption

[TygersaidStfu]

i thought that china's rule is that each family must have one kid in the family ..:|

 

[TygersaidStfu]

Originally posted by Steel
USA is NOT a perfect country or anything...it's just a better country, even though there are lots of problems in the USA, but the laws are still fair here in the USA anyway

I wouldn't be sure about that. : (

 

[dojosky]

yup ur right abt china i heard the same myself and about adoption how its real sad ! that some parents were ready to give up a deaf child for adoption till those people at the adoption center gave the parents the information that they could get ssi for the deaf child they all run to the nearest social security office and cancel all the adoption process jeez how selfish they are all they think is of $$$ !

 

[Lasza]

My mother give me up when I was 3 days old. Lucky my grandparents got me right away. They have me with legal guardianship. Grateful of them to have me. I have seen my real mother most of my life. Sadly, I still not even get truth about why did she give me up for what reasons. That's very selfish for her keep secret from me about why did she give up on me. If I have own kid then keep it instead of give up.

 

[ChelEler]

Originally posted by Lasza
My mother give me up when I was 3 days old. Lucky my grandparents got me right away. They have me with legal guardianship. Grateful of them to have me. I have seen my real mother most of my life. Sadly, I still not even get truth about why did she give me up for what reasons. That's very selfish for her keep secret from me about why did she give up on me. If I have own kid then keep it instead of give up.

OUCH! I'm sorry you had to go thru this. Do you want to know why your biological mom gave you up? If so, do you have the guts to ask her? I'm curious.

 

[Lasza]

Yes, I did asked her. she kept denied and avoid answerd my questions. how sad!

 

[javapride]

Originally posted by Lasza
Yes, I did asked her. she kept denied and avoid answerd my questions. how sad!

im sorry u went thru that with ur mom, at least u know one thing u still have ur dad that stays in touch with u thats more important than selfishness! hang in there sissy !

 

[MsGiglz]

Originally posted by mike
well you know that i am adoption i have other brother too so i cant find real mother we are over 30 year old now sadddd well i know its hard to feeling

Look at bright side that you raised by adoption parents, You came out good and grown.. be thankful because there arent many adoption kids didnt raise or even didnt make it..

 

[MsGiglz]

Originally posted by Steel
is it OKAY for some parents to give up their child for adoption even if they are rich and healthy?

is it OKAY for some parents to give up their child for adoption when they don't want a child in their lives?

if they never wanted a child, then they shouldn't have sex in the first place!

Let me catch you guys up..

is it OKAY for some parents to give up their child for adoption even if they are rich and healthy?

I disagreed..

if they never wanted a child, then they shouldn't have sex in the first place! [/QUOTE][/B]

Well --you know alot people cant resist sex and they dont use protection sex.. eh!


Well, my dad came from big family, his sisters and brothers have 5-7 kids each families... when he and my mom gave birth which was me... and they couldnt have more because my mom have uterus infection/ had surgery to take ovaries out.. (long time ago they didnt do good job than now days or medience too).. So My parents adopted my sister and my brother...... It was very strict that time because my parents are kind of older, they had hard time to get process so.. my suspections that they adopted them thru by black market.. (which is famous in 60's-70's).. they never talked about it but after My dad passed away.. and my mom gone little .. My sister and My brother think its not fair for me not know what's going on. so they told me.. My sister admitted that she saw her real parents and very disappointed that her real parents still not welcome her.. even though they are very wealthy... when they gave birth.. found out that my sister isnt perfect.. (just have lazy eye), my dad spend alot $ to repair that.. she turned out beauitful.. later she realized, she is very happy that we raised her in good family.. And my brother.. his real mother was very young latin.. age 15.. the real dad was deport for vietman war.. he told her to keep baby and he WILL come back and be there as family but the mother gave baby away.. and disappeared.. she dropped off the baby at our catholic church , they knew that my dad would love to have other child.. so my parents adopted baby.. he was only 2 days old.. his real dad have been looking for my brother for 28 years till 2 years ago, my brother got letter from catholic association, that he have real dad and still look for him.. would like to know how he is doing and know the truth about why giving up for an adoption.. so my brother felt not right and dont want us felt bad that he*turn his back on us*.. but I told him.. go on and meet him.. dont have to be his dad.. can be a friend.. so they met.. amazing! small world.. all those years, his real dad and us only live 15 min apart.. Plus, my brother got married and married in that church where his real dad go... his real dad's wife involved in habitat for humanity where i go.. but they were very happy and proud that my parents raised him in good life.. and they felt bad that they didnt have chance to meet my dad.. bless his soul...

 

[MsGiglz]

Originally posted by eternity
Mike, why do they care about the money, eh? In other country, many people do not have any money. Most women who are breastfeeding because they do not cost. They can use cloth to use as diaper.

Hospital... they will BILLING to you. Without stop women from go there if they are gonna have a baby.

Why adoption? Blood pure blood. stay with FAMILY not grow apart. They have no idea who they come from? Better off stay with family as root..

Well, I am for adoption, alot couples have been trying to have child, there are alot options, like
medicine for guys who have low count sperm and etc
- but some guys wouldnt want try.. (guys are wuss) hehe
medicine for women too.. or have infertility produce process.
or infertility shots... sometimes it didnt work.. it took them years.. their time is ticking... so other way to adopt baby..

my sister have cervix cancer when she was 21 years old and last year she had hystermony (sp?), I told her that if she want a baby, let me know before i will have my tubes tied.. she said that she isnt fit as mother, she is fit as aunt.. hehe but for example some families or friends can give birth for others who cant bear a child...

Blood pure blood ~ Better off stay with family as root...

Well.. look at this world... its mess and No one is perfect.. give a life chance than stay with family --- what *if* the family is a mess/fk-ed up... dont want this life to grow up like that..

Think about this.. be blessed that you raised/grown... alot of lives didnt have chance to live..

 

[pinkster]

*agrees with annie* Adoption is, well, an option. My adoption story is a little (well, a lot) different than most adoption stories. My mom got pregnant with my sister when she was 18 and still a senior in high school. 3 months later they were forced to get married. (This was 1982, in Colorado, and my mom came from a southern-baptist family) My sister came along in November that year, I followed in December the next year. Within 3 years they were separated and Dad moved to MN with the 2 of us. I saw my mom sporadically, since money was tight. The older I got, the less I wanted to see her, but felt obligated to go. When I was 7 my dad remarried and within 6 months my dad had asked my birth mom if she'd be willing to give up all her legal rights to my sister and I, and allow my step mom to adopt us. My mom said yes. A lot of people ask me if i feel bitter that she did that, and I dont. I was 8, i love BOTH my mothers. I have one who raised me, and one who gave birth to me. It wasnt till I was 14 where I went to visit my mom without my sister, and I came to love her. Yes, the big thing between us was that I am Deaf and she is not. She knows ASL, very well i might add, but its not the same as living with my dad, who is also Deaf. Yet when I was 17, I moved to Colorado for my senior year to 1) find out who my mom really is, 2) make a new life for myself, and 3) graduate on time. I did all of that, but couldnt stay. Back in MN i went after graduation. Im thankful I had an open relationship with my parents (mom and dad), because my dad could have said "hell no u cant see ur mom!"

Blessed, thats what I say sometimes. Those who find their real parents, i think are given another opportunity to find out what really happened. Sometimes it turns out for the best, sometimes it doesnt. I'd personally want to see a child given up for adoption than abandonded or other things.

But true, people who are rich and whatnot, should not feel like "well i didnt want this so get rid of it." A child is a blessing, and like Annie said, some people cant have babies. You win some, you lose some.

 

[illustrator]

Originally posted by TygersaidStfu
i thought that china's rule is that each family must have one kid in the family ..:|

And they help to save $$ on family.

 

[MsGiglz]

Thanks Jams for agreed with me..
and I am so glad that you came out so great person! keep that way and you are so loved!
\,,/_

 

[Irish Devil Dog]

I'm adopted.. My birth mother gave me away for adoption when she was only 17 and still in HS and didnt have time to take care of me and it was careless pregnancy as I'm sure of. I will still looking for my birth mom, but at first I ve got to settle down and have some $$ to take a trip to Mass where I born in. My mom adopted me when I was 2 months old... She was working as foster home and fell in love with me so she decided to keep me. I'm glad they raised me well, and came out great =)

 

[pinkster]

_lml annie Its been a long 5 years to get where I am today You know that :P So thank you! *mentions the word adoption just because its an *on-topic debate* =X*

 

[Fly Free]

Originally posted by MsGiglz
Thanks Jams for agreed with me..
and I am so glad that you came out so great person! keep that way and you are so loved!
\,,/_

i agree with u MsGiglz on Jamie -- shes come a long way! and came out just GREAT!!!!!! *nodding* i just TOTALLY agree (i know OTP but ahh had to post this too)

 

[javapride]

i had the honor of meeting pinkster, and i know one thing she's a lovable woman and a very sweet one to boot, she's come a long way and im grateful flyfree has introduced me to her and i got the chance to meet her, and as for adoption i think i did mentioned it earlier posting, but i do want to add, there are lot of love all over the world that would die to have children in thier lives, too many unwanted children and so little places to put them in a home or rasied by loving family. This world is indeed messed up but it's nothing compared to where the love comes from. U have a wonderful family jams, and i agree with fly free and ms giglz lots of love to u .........

 

[Oddball]

I agree with pinkster and Annie. I was adopted at 4 months old. My birthmom was 17, going to be 18, delivered me and gave me away for some reasons. I have not seen her until 1992. I finally met her for first time and I was curious about my family tree and medical history. I was disappointed that she was resisted about it. Sighs.

Well, I don't get along with my adoptive mom for many years because we clashed at each other on different issues that pop up. I know that we are very different because she does not understand what I went through and wanted me to be "hearing". OH, please. I get along with my adoptive dad even though I have to speak to them orally.

When I want kids, I prefer to have natural babies because I feel that adopted kids and I might have different characteristics. Just how I feel about adoption issues.

Pros and cons on adoption issues are the most common to individuals. I consider that Adoption is better option than abortion. Many kids need better homes and parents who love them.

 

[pinkster]

Oddball: Its good you tried, sad she wasnt open. Like I said, you win some, you lose some. Its the thought that counts.

 

[ShEiLdTaLiSmAn]

I'm a young mother, 19 years old. I found pregnant at age 18. I didnt wanted the child. But my thought was on set no aboration or adopting. I had no money. I just met the guy who is the father of my child.

Knowing I would regret doing either way and I decide to keep the baby. The baby's father when I was suspecting if I was pregnant had asked me to get aboration. I refuse and walked out on the discussion. I think I got him thinking because I refused. I look at my nieces and nephews and the luv was unbelieveable....its not something u can explain.

I know if I gave her away... its going to be lil selfish but in a way not. Its because I got no money and I'm too young to be a mom. But knowin the state would help and will gave all my love to her no matter what. You guys can say I... my love was greater than money and things that are happening around here. My love was set on her from beginning of my pregnancy. I even freaked out lil things and went hospital for it and EVEN get mad at the hospital for keeping me waiting. After monitor and everything, I calmed. *Look at the baby father.* He told me because I dont see it. I have problem with depression and its Bipolar. Right now I'm finding out there might be set of another depression related and I cant approve that 100 percent. I have to go doctor for it. Anyway, the depression wasnt giving me thinking stright type of thing because my mind start racking against alot of nervousness. "Will I be a good mom?" "Will my depression mess up our relationship?" "How can I do this?" This and that with whole pregnancy.

After the first ultra-sound... she waved. The baby's father, Dan cried and I was all smiling on my face. (Partly because I missed half of it. I was looking at dr, my mom, my sis and Dan. After they were explaining what was going on and point at the ultrasound and I caught before she put her arms down.) To this day, I wish I had kept looking at the ultrasound and see the hands waving but I have photoshoot of it.

More ultrasound, more heartbeat listening, knowing shes a girl before I left RI to Maine, then she was born.. My love had increased everytime. The first time I said she was my daughter, it actually weird me out. I was like NO! This isnt a daughter, its some kid. Then I think again, what the fuck.. it is because i'm carrying it.

I was dued Jan 7th. On Jan 8th, I said that it, lets go! Lets have the baby. (I have reasons and WILL not explain to today but only my daughter will know the reason.) And deliver her on 9th of Jan.

I must admit, I was messed up with sleeping pills that had screw me up and I remember saying WHOA! after seeing Leila in Doctor's hand. They had to put Leila in the heater to check up with her. She was fine afterward. My mind was totally messed up because I didnt know what was reality and what was a "dream" so my heart was messed up. Now I had learned my lesson not to take sleeping pills. Lolz! No way!

I have to admit.. My love for Leila had increase lil by lil, day by day, weeks by weeks, months by months up to end of 3 mos of her age, I finally fell in love with her. Even I changed her, bottle-feed (bipolar, had to take med.) and everything else... didnt really click my mind together. I know and I TOTALLY know its my depression related that made the love slower but IT might be there and dont realized it. I finally feel it around the time.
Now more I say shes my daughter... I am comfortbale with it. I will even risk my life for her and let her be with the family member IF I died tomorrow or some years later. I WILL risk my life for her.

Today, I still cant see why...HOW can parents deal with their blood, their parts, their features on the kid(s)' face and the love EVEN the cold heart by giving them away? I was surprised with 1 story from baby story (its tv show) and this woman actually gave away the child so a parent can have a child. JUST so the parent have 1. I think she still have contact with the kid and let the kid know the REAL mother loves her and she got pregnant again and had more kids to herself. Mmm.. but how can u.....could u gave away the kid? I cant. Theres no way. My love is too big and will do anything to keep the kid as mine.