Adoption or Biological Parents?

deafbajagal said:
Why can't the child have the relationship with both the father and the adoptive parents? Why must it be one or the other? Especially in this case...
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What if the biological parents live in another state and the adoptive parents didnt want the child to move away to live with them?

It seems like some say the adoptive parents should have more rights while others say that the biological parents do.

For me, since a child has established roots with the adoptive parents and is living life to the fullest as a child, I would say that too much time has passed and the child is now automatically the adoption parents'.

Do you think there should be a law stating that if a certain amount of time has passed, the biological parents automatically lose their parental rights regardless of the father not knowing about the child or that his signature was forged?
 
shel90 said:
What if the biological parents live in another state and the adoptive parents didnt want the child to move away to live with them?

It seems like some say the adoptive parents should have more rights while others say that the biological parents do.

For me, since a child has established roots with the adoptive parents and is living life to the fullest as a child, I would say that too much time has passed and the child is now automatically the adoption parents'.

Do you think there should be a law stating that if a certain amount of time has passed, the biological parents automatically lose their parental rights regardless of the father not knowing about the child or that his signature was forged?
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Totally agree with that statement. Also, I feel that before a child should be placed for adoption, every effort should be made to find both parents for consent ti give that child up. It's always hard when a mother refuses to name the father. I realize, this would not work all the time in situations where it is a pregnancy resulting from rape. There are too many children out there who do not have their father's name on the birth certificate and that needs to be changed. We live in a "throw-away" society and that's just not right.
 
shel90 said:
What if the biological parents live in another state and the adoptive parents didnt want the child to move away to live with them?

It seems like some say the adoptive parents should have more rights while others say that the biological parents do.

For me, since a child has established roots with the adoptive parents and is living life to the fullest as a child, I would say that too much time has passed and the child is now automatically the adoption parents'.

Do you think there should be a law stating that if a certain amount of time has passed, the biological parents automatically lose their parental rights regardless of the father not knowing about the child or that his signature was forged?
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I agree, the adoptive parent should have more rights in this situation cos they were one raise the child and care the child but father still should have some rights (non abusive one, caring father), right to visit his child and get to know his child and child still live with adoptive parent home. It doesn't have to be one or other, why not have both?
 
Speedy Hawk said:
I agree, the adoptive parent should have more rights in this situation cos they were one raise the child and care the child but father still should have some rights (non abusive one, caring father), right to visit his child and get to know his child and child still live with adoptive parent home. It doesn't have to be one or other, why not have both?
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I believe what you describe would be considered a foster home or guardian arrangement. Adoption involves a permanent transfer of all rights and responsibilities from biological to adoptive parents.

Biological parents have no rights or responsibilities once a legitimate adoption transpires. Because of such things as fraud (like the case described where one parent forged the name of another), a high number of domestic adoptions are disrupted/terminated (~25%) during the process, and up to 10% of those finalized are dissolved after they are finalized. To avoid this, many potential adoptive families in the US adopt from overseas, rather than from the many children who need homes in the US, and several other countries adopt children from the US.
 
66% done with the book. I think this is a Christian publisher attempting to convert people or reassure them that Christianity always wins out.

This is the type of book sold in Christian bookstores. Maybe the movie downplayed that part?
 
Biological parents have no rights or responsibilities once a legitimate adoption transpires.
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That's not true. Parental rights are governed by state law.

When a child is adopted, it is important that the parental rights of both mother and father are terminated. If the father's rights are not terminated, it's a risk for the adoptive parents. In my state, a baby placed with an adoption agency has parental rights terminated before being placed. That's the safest route for adoptive parents. For older kids, it's more complicated. International adoption is not a risk because the parents are adopting orphans (as defined in their country).

A friend investigated local adoption through the government. They told her that she could have a Hispanic baby girl placed in 6 months. My friend is Hispanic. I had no idea that was even possible!
 
Haven't seen the movie....but remember many court cases in the past where this situation had come up...many, many times, the biological father won the right to get the child back....It was on the news, and the child was screaming and crying, being dragged from the adoptive mother's arms!....It was heartbreaking to watch it...

Here in Duval County, every effort is made to contact the biological parents, 3-6 months, even posting it in the newspapers before allowing the adoption of the child/children.

In my case, both parents were found and both signed away their parental rights....My boys' birth certificates have my name as the "natural mother" on them.....

As far as the "father" not knowing the woman was pregnant, and she giving the child up for adoption...if every effort was made to find out who and where the father is/was...and no responses....then I feel the adoptive parents should have "full rights'....However, the law doesn't always work in their favor!....Many people who are childless and unable to have children, are "wary" of adoptions, knowing that in some cases, the child could go back to the natural parent(s).

I feel sorry for the real father....but he should be aware that his child is now adopted and in a good home....being allowed visitation rights...but not full custody of the child....when the child get older, then perhaps the child will make a decision who to live with, as long as the child has been told what had happened and why they were adopted.

My 3 adopted boys have been with me for 10 years....before I would have them taken away...I would go to the Supreme Court and fight it!....The natural father gets released from prison next year, 2012....I will not allow any visitation from him! When the boys reach legal age, then it will be their decision, if any, to have contact with their real father/mother.
 
Wish I knew about this movie...was it on Lifetime? I'll like to watch it.

As myself was adopted to my dad's parent. They saved my life. Long story.

Once I see this movie, I can dicuss about it in here. :)
 
I'd like to check that movie out...

Myself am adopted too, but just found my bio mother on FB few months ago, and we gettin along real wonderful. :)
 
I don't know my biological mother at all. I have one picture of her, that my grandmother gave me before she died and that is all.

The book this movie is based on, is making the point that the biological mother like the case before Solomon , loves the child enough to sacrifice her happiness so that the child can be happy and well cared for.
 
Hi sallylou, in what state are the biological parents' rights and responsibiliites with regard to the child not terminated upon finalizing an adoption?

sallylou said:
That's not true. Parental rights are governed by state law.
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I have put the book on hold at my local county library. Guess I need to see if the city library has it in. Also, neither one has the DVD yet.

Just found out, city library has the DVD and I have it on hold. The city also has one of the books, but it's not large prints, so I will wait for the other.
 
I don't profess to know the law of other states. I'm envisioning an adoption in which the father's rights are not properly terminated. Then, the adoption would be defective. Always have to consider what can go wrong.
 
I was adopted at birth. Went home from hostpital with my parents. At age 15 met my biological mom and we are really good friends now. Giving me up was the right thing to do and I am thankful for that, and also happy to have her in my life now.
 
Mmm... Interesting... I always was told that a man can't have a say when it comes up to her decision for what's the best for her child. Only women can decide, not men... (unless if she is an abusive/neglect parent and he is not, then his child should be with him.) Women can place her child up for adoption or to raise her child without man's knowledge.

Now you guys have me so confused... I thought only women decide for their kids, not men? :confused: But I'll watch that new movie whenever I have the time. But I also thought if mother decides to give her child to adoptive parents, and if she changes her mind and want her child back before 30 days passed (depends on laws in states). Then she can get her child back... But if it is passed 30 days, then she can't get her child because of the agreement on adoption. Only visiting is acceptable... Additionally, there is no involvement for fathers... that is what I know of.

Unless... someone is more welcome to correct me.
 
KarissaMann05 said:
Mmm... Interesting... I always was told that a man can't have a say when it comes up to her decision for what's the best for her child. Only women can decide, not men... (unless if she is an abusive/neglect parent and he is not, then his child should be with him.) ...
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Someone gave you incorrect information.
 
Reba said:
Yes, but the case was about the guy not knowing the woman was pregnant, not about the woman not knowing that she was pregnant.
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In the movie, the biological parents were married at the time. That's what makes this situation so fascinating and it does make one think.
 
LakeTahoe said:
Wish I knew about this movie...was it on Lifetime? I'll like to watch it.

As myself was adopted to my dad's parent. They saved my life. Long story.

Once I see this movie, I can dicuss about it in here. :)
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It on DVD rental. Go to Redbox to see if one is available.
 
No, I haven't seen this movie. It sounds good. I definitely will rent it thru Netflix.

My oldest niece adopted a baby girl thru the biological parents but they were teenagers at the time. (Now, my great-niece is 4 3/4 years old. She's so cute! She loves her baby brother. He is not adopted, BTW.) They don't bother contacting her but my niece still sends in her adoptive daughter's biological mother yearly update. It's very nice of my niece to do that.
 
If an unmarried pregnant woman isn't required to notify the man of her pregnancy before getting an abortion, why does she need to notify him before surrendering the baby for adoption?
 
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