9 year old Aided main stream child so many questions

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WillsMom08

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Hello, so mad at myself for waiting for 8 years to find this!!

My immediate issue is that My son is mild hearing loss aided bi latterly. Qualifies for no help. I have fought tooth and nail for EVERYTHING at our school. Our principal and special education adviser are kind, however under educated about his disability.

So, we are 3rd grade now, and we are chugging along. I have been saying for 4 years to anyone and everyone he can not discern words. He dosent know that when you say Fake a left he thinks you just said TAKE a left.....

I finally have had it with "it will all work out. we wont count off for those mistakes..."

I heard someone say he needs "refine discrimination" help. I wrote it down thinking I can find that.

Not having any luck on google. Can anyone point me in the direction???
thanks!!
 
What about enrolling him at the Deaf school?
 
I have wanted to do that from day one. He loves it there :) he feels like he fits in....
BUT it isnt what is best for him right now. He needs as much speech practice as he can get. He has to learn how to function in 'our world'.
 
WillsMom08 said:
Hello, so mad at myself for waiting for 8 years to find this!!

My immediate issue is that My son is mild hearing loss aided bi latterly. Qualifies for no help. I have fought tooth and nail for EVERYTHING at our school. Our principal and special education adviser are kind, however under educated about his disability.

So, we are 3rd grade now, and we are chugging along. I have been saying for 4 years to anyone and everyone he can not discern words. He dosent know that when you say Fake a left he thinks you just said TAKE a left.....

I finally have had it with "it will all work out. we wont count off for those mistakes..."

I heard someone say he needs "refine discrimination" help. I wrote it down thinking I can find that.

Not having any luck on google. Can anyone point me in the direction???
thanks!!
Click to expand...

By "refine discrimination" they mean he needs to practice thinking in context and thinking what word would fit when he can't tell what word it is.
 
Have mercy on me, PLEASE!! I mean he will be living on his on in the next 15 years and he needs to be able to function and be happy.

I think that going to a hearing impaired school will be easy on him. But I need him to realize there is not going to be a job made for a hearing impaired him?! I need him to learn that no one is willingly going to accommodate him for the most part. So if he can never expect it, he will have to learn how to help himself.

I am very open to opinions. Please just know I have never made a decision for him that I didnt think was in his best interest, as difficult as that has been so many times. It is the most painful thing to watch my child be different, so please dont be mean. I can take a different opinion :)
 
By "refine discrimination" they mean he needs to practice thinking in context and thinking what word would fit when he can't tell what word it is

the issue is he is mild hearing loss he dosent know he isnt hearing it correctly. So am i looking for speech therapy?
 
I strongly encourage you to read every threads of this forum and you will see and learn something from each of us.

good luck

He is going to be fine as long as he is able to communicate without getting furious.
 
WillsMom08 said:
By "refine discrimination" they mean he needs to practice thinking in context and thinking what word would fit when he can't tell what word it is

the issue is he is mild hearing loss he dosent know he isnt hearing it correctly. So am i looking for speech therapy?
Click to expand...

Yes
 
Beautiful are there speech therapist that specialize in this?

and I am asking for speech therapy to help correct refine discrimination?
 
WillsMom08 said:
Beautiful are there speech therapist that specialize in this?

and I am asking for speech therapy to help correct refine discrimination?
Click to expand...

You are asking for therapy to help him learn to discriminate speech.

Testing by an audiologist should occur to find out what his speech discrimination scores are.
 
What state do you live in? They much have some centers for deaf and hoh people that could help you .
 
OK, looking through notes. He tested high on his discrimination scores. That is why the school can not help him. HOWEVER, he is exhibiting signs that he is struggling. Papers being turned in with wrong words. Stories he has of things that are completely different because he couldnt see someones lips that was talking.
In an ideal environment he is all good but he is not in the testing environment ever in his life.
My question then is do I get him the speech therapy because regardless of the 'test' i can see he needs the help?
 
WillsMom08 said:
Have mercyand grew up with on me, PLEASE!! I mean he will be living on his on in the next 15 years and he needs to be able to function and be happy.

I think that going to a hearing impaired school will be easy on him. But I need him to realize there is not going to be a job made for a hearing impaired him?! I need him to learn that no one is willingly going to accommodate him for the most part. So if he can never expect it, he will have to learn how to help himself.

I am very open to opinions. Please just know I have never made a decision for him that I didnt think was in his best interest, as difficult as that has been so many times. It is the most painful thing to watch my child be different, so please dont be mean. I can take a different opinion :)
Click to expand...

I was mainstreamed and I hated it . I grew up with a low self esteem. . my brother went to a Deaf school and he was happy and grew up being confident with leadership qualities. We both have Masters degrees. going the Deaf school didnt do my brother any harm while mainstreaming did me and many other of my deaf friends harm. yes I have great speech skills but I still wasnt able to interact with my hearing peers fully as do with my deaf peers using ASL.

deaf people are real people, just a fyi
 
Hi WillsMom08,

I want to address some issues you've brought up, and some that came to mind while reading your thread.

I am a hearing person, and I've spent about a year so far volunteering at a Deaf school. The kids use American Sign Language, but there are also classes where they work on their speech skills, and then of course all their academics (Math, Science, History, Geography, English etc.) and they can join sports teams, do all kinds of things kids need and want.

I have never once seen anyone at the school facilitating an attitude in the kids that they don't have to work hard because the world will just make a space for them. The teachers and staff work so hard to make sure the kids get a good education, and everyone seems to get enough individual attention that no one falls through the cracks.

And you won't find anyone there under-educated about deafness. The specific needs that your son is dealing with - these places are rich in knowledgeable people and resources equipped to address them.

You mentioned that he needs to be able to function and be happy. Part of being happy has to do with having a community of people who have some sense of what you go through on a daily basis. If he can make Deaf and Hard of Hearing friends among his peers, and find all the support that comes from that experience (like you said, feeling like he fits in), that doesn't make him soft: it gives him strength to take forward into his life. And friendships he can keep too.

If he needs some support, I don't think not giving it to him is helpful. The struggle under that burden may be too much. Whereas if he gets a healthy foundation in an environment where he can truly thrive, then he has something solid to build on.

I know that you said his hearing loss is mild, and that probably adds to your hesitation about sending him to a deaf school. It's got to be a hard call as a parent. I would think that the fact that he was happy there would be a strong indicator that it could be a good place for him. At the same time, I know this is not a trivial decision, and some post on an online forum is not authoritative - you have to decide these things.

I can tell you that while you're interacting in the Deaf community, it's good to remember that "hearing impaired" is generally a phrase to avoid. The Deaf community has a vibrant culture that doesn't focus on the idea of impairment. If you're looking for a phrase that doesn't suggest that he's completely deaf, Hard of Hearing is a good choice in this context.

I wish you luck, and please, follow Frisky Feline's encouragement and do some reading throughout this forum.
 
I dont think Will hates public main stream. I do see slight self esteem issues.

Everyone I have worked with that is involved with the deaf school has advised me strongly against it.

I guess I have never challenged them. Can you tell me why your mom main streamed you?

I dont think they can deny him access to the deaf school can they? I am going to revisit this. Never thought of it that way.

I will say this and again ask not to be criticized for this: Just this last week on Wednesday, I talked to the principal or our deaf school program and said, I wanted to move my child there. We are struggling with under educated teachers and I dont know what to ask for anymore. I was told :"You do not want to send him here. He would be board because there is considerable time spent on helping others understand."
 
WillsMom08 said:
I dont think Will hates public main stream. I do see slight self esteem issues.

Everyone I have worked with that is involved with the deaf school has advised me strongly against it.

I guess I have never challenged them. Can you tell me why your mom main streamed you?

I dont think they can deny him access to the deaf school can they? I am going to revisit this. Never thought of it that way.

I will say this and again ask not to be criticized for this: Just this last week on Wednesday, I talked to the principal or our deaf school program and said, I wanted to move my child there. We are struggling with under educated teachers and I dont know what to ask for anymore. I was told :"You do not want to send him here. He would be board because there is considerable time spent on helping others understand."
Click to expand...

Well that's strange of the principal to say that. Is the principal hearing or deaf? Where is this school?

The reason I ask if the principal is hearing because there are some Deaf schools who have hearing principals or administrators who see deaf children at deaf schools lower functioning than hearing children and that is an old audist attitude from the old days which shouldn't be happening today. If the principal has that attitude then it is obvious he/she has a low morale at his/her job and shouldn't be working there.

The Deaf schools around this region are using the Common Core State Standards and S.T.E.M. education which is a very rigorous academic program.

What about a strong deaf/hh program at any of the public schools in your town? They can be knowledgeable about how to teach and work with deaf/hh children.
 
I dont know why but I always assumed the hearing principal was correct. I am going to do some calling and more research monday morning about this.

We have NO help for my son in our school district. The deaf school is about 20 minutes from us. The reason we are struggling is because our educators are NOT educated on how to help us.

I have a feeling Monday morning when I ask for ASL for him I will get the standard "he does not qualify."

I am pretty sure that they will have to teach him ASL and then provide an interrupter which will solve a few of his current issues.

So many things should happen for us but NO one knows until it is too late or I figure them out on my own. I dont believe anyone is being malicious but again they are so under educated with his condition.....It is so frustrating.

I wish I would have taught him ASL from age 2!
 
WillsMom08 said:
I dont know why but I always assumed the hearing principal was correct. I am going to do some calling and more research monday morning about this.

We have NO help for my son in our school district. The deaf school is about 20 minutes from us. The reason we are struggling is because our educators are NOT educated on how to help us.

I have a feeling Monday morning when I ask for ASL for him I will get the standard "he does not qualify."

I am pretty sure that they will have to teach him ASL and then provide an interrupter which will solve a few of his current issues.

So many things should happen for us but NO one knows until it is too late or I figure them out on my own. I dont believe anyone is being malicious but again they are so under educated with his condition.....It is so frustrating.

I wish I would have taught him ASL from age 2!
Click to expand...

Yea, I was born with a severe-profound bilateral hearing loss of 110 dB and the mainstreaming teacher's solution to meet my needs were to seat me in the first row but then again, they would walk around the classroom during instruction. Hello? I was so lost and clueless and I got reprimanded several times for not paying attention. Or teachers who turn their backs to the class to write on the blackboard while giving their lectures. Yea, that really was meeting my needs...NOT!

I empathize!
 
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