5 Yr Old Cuffed On Principal's Orders

[Vance]

There are much more appropriate ways to teach the kid. Fear does not help a kid stop bullying. Fear only compounds everything.

Any principal should have been able to know many other more feasible ways to deal with the boy.

Agreed. Naturally, handcuffing is ridiculous thing to start with.

When I was younger, I had a friend who was having trouble dealing with his parents divorce and started to get into a lot of trouble... He was put in a 'scared straight' program where the kids went into a jail and were scared sheetless by inmates and the guards. He came out a changed person and for the better. It really scared him sheetless and gave showed him what is life would be like in jail. I think the principle had the right intentions but the wrong solution. He saw a kid who was heading down the wrong path and took an extreme measure to thwart it early on.

Like what Levonian said. I heard about it as well but if I remember correctly that it does not solve any problems. Suppressed fear is very, very danger. It is like timebomb. History itself said all, I don't have to make some points out of that. To use the fear against kids or people will be always backfire. It is the rule. I would think people already know by now but I guess not :/ (btw, I am not speaking of you.. don't get me wrong. I am talking about general people). I will share what I know below.

I read all of posts in here so here's my opinion:

Years and years, people almost always resort to wrong approach or solution to solve the issues. Is it pattern behavior or pre-imprinted genetic or what? From here, I notice one thing about schools, parents and governments... They tend to point their fingers at each other.. why not FOR ONCE, they work together to resolve this children violence issues in America? Is it killing them to do that? I believe that parents, schools and government should share their responsibilities... Once parents drop off their kid(s) at school, it becomes school's responsibility automatically... Like what Taylor said, principle had the right intentions but not that solution (obviously wrong one).

I want to share about my real experience... I was a violent kid. I had been in fights with kids while in mainstreamed school for few years... My mom puzzled and tried different methods, disciplines and therapies included old-fashioned but nonworkable spanking (by my dad) and 'boot' camp. Nothing works. My mom noticed the same pattern behavior in different children, she decided to investigate on her own and found a simple solution... Believe it or not, it is foods. It affect our thinking ability, our behaviors, etc etc.. much more than you think. As doctor-student, I found more and more evidences that confirmed my mother's suspicious. Anyway, my mom changed the diet from conventional junk and foods to healthy foods included organic meats... My frequently violent behaviors suddenly disappeared in only two week. No therapies or disciplines in that time. Nothing whatsoever but foods. It stunned my mother. People start to ask my mom when they notice that my violence behaviors are completely disappeared and took my mom's advice.. it is working on their children as well.

I don't remember when but my mother showed me the article about children who have or had violent behaviors went to one special program which offer nothing but organic foods and 'touch-feeling-think' & 'hand-on' therapies. It works 100%. They yet fail to solve these violent behaviors. I will have to ask my mother to see if she remember the name of that program. Oh also I worked as aide to one of therapists at Sweden last summer. They have the same program and it was fascinating... It is SO successful that New Europe plan to overhaul their system to copying Sweden's program to resolve the violent behaviors in children. I saw the real results myself when I worked with these violent swedish kids. I worked with pre-k to 12 grade kids for 7 years. I believe I know what I saw (unless my lying eyes told me otherwise..?) and I know what I am talking about. But of course, I didn't claim that I am an expert or claim that I am so please don't jump to the conclusion.

If any of you watch 'Super Size Me', I can use it as example, that part about children behaviors in school confirmed my point as well. I shared my opinion... nothing more.

In fact, what did principle did is morally wrong. It is partly school's fault...It is partly parent 's fault. I will say again, suppressed fear is not solve anything. It never did. Suppressed fear in childhood can lead to violence in adulthood. It is like 90% guarantee.To be honest with you, I have no rights to make a judgement on principle or parents... that article sure didn't give enough information.

once again... school, parents and government really need to work together to resolve it instead of usual 'pointing a finger' pattern behavior.

Regards,
Magatsu

Edit: P.S. I agree with Cheri and others' points concerning about principle and disciplines.

 

[Banjo]

Nobody touch my child but me.

When a child is at the school, the parents are absent. Therefore, you have to allow the teachers to discipline the kids.

The child wasn't physically hurt. Simply handcuffed and droven around for a bit in a cop car. If the mother don't like that, then she better discipline her child or else. Which she doesn't show any signs of in the article.

The only solution other than giving detention, suspensions, etc is to expel the child so that the children won't have to get abused by him everyday because people aren't allowed to touch him even when they are not physically harming the child.

The society truly has became overprotective of the children, period. It was barely 20 years ago that teachers were allowed to use sticks to hit students with. Nowdays, teachers are getting stabbed, shot, beaten up and more because they can't touch the students. The students can scream, talk back and hit teachers whenver they want and only get a suspension with no legal charges. But I don't believe teachers should be allowed to physically harm the students, period. But they should be allowed to grab a student's arm and drag to the principal's office because that is not abuse, that is discipline.

It's up to the parents on if they want to spank the child or not. None of business.

Magatsu,

I don't remember when but my mother showed me the article about children who have or had violent behaviors went to one special program which offer nothing but organic foods and 'touch-feeling-think' & 'hand-on' therapies. It works 100%. They yet fail to solve these violent behaviors. I will have to ask my mother to see if she remember the name of that program. Oh also I worked as aide to one of therapists at Sweden last summer. They have the same program and it was fascinating... It is SO successful that New Europe plan to overhaul their system to copying Sweden's program to resolve the violent behaviors in children. I saw the real results myself when I worked with these violent swedish kids. I worked with pre-k to 12 grade kids for 7 years. I believe I know what I saw (unless my lying eyes told me otherwise..?) and I know what I am talking about. But of course, I didn't claim that I am an expert or claim that I am so please don't jump to the conclusion.

Perhaps, if this is for real. Why don't you push for a law based on this that way, maybe we'll see a difference?

 

[Vance]

With this currently Admin in America? I don't think they will even try and consider. They love drug industry than anything else.

And yes, it is for real... but again, it is up to you to take my words or not. *shrugs* I already sent via email to my mom to get more information about the program.

 

[Banjo]

With this currently Admin in America? I don't think they will even try and consider. They love drug industry than anything else.

And yes, it is for real... but again, it is up to you to take my words or not. *shrugs* I already sent via email to my mom to get more information about the program.

Well, what you said is relatively a new concept to me. But as a second thought, I do recall reading that eating too much soy can make somebody more aggressive.

Yes, I do believe that eating the wrong food is linked to anger problems.

 

[Cheri]

The society truly has became overprotective of the children, period. It was barely 20 years ago that teachers were allowed to use sticks to hit students with. Nowdays, teachers are getting stabbed, shot, beaten up and more because they can't touch the students. The students can scream, talk back and hit teachers whenver they want and only get a suspension with no legal charges. But I don't believe teachers should be allowed to physically harm the students, period. But they should be allowed to grab a student's arm and drag to the principal's office because that is not abuse, that is discipline.

If a teacher grab a student's by arm and if the student get bruises, Then sorry that is child abuse. If people can report on parent when they see bruises on arms, why can't we report on the teachers?

 

[Banjo]

If a teacher grab a student's by arm and if the student get bruises, Then sorry that is child abuse. If people can report on parent when they see bruises on arms, why can't we report on the teachers?

Did I say to grab a student like a beast?

No.

 

[Cheri]

"He fights, he strikes somebody practically every day on the bus". Striking is being violent, period. The child is violent because he strikes people on the bus everyday.

Oh my goodness, Simple solution, he can be banned from riding the bus...Because my son's school does the same thing they give you warning and if you do it again you get banned from riding the bus again. So that means there has to be another way for the kid to get a ride to school and pick up that would be the parents or the relatives of the 5 yrs old.

 

[Banjo]

Oh my goodness, Simple solution, he can be banned from riding the bus...Because my son's school does the same thing they give you warning and if you do it again you get banned from riding the bus again. So that means there has to be another way for the kid to get a ride to school and pick up that would be the parents or the relatives of the 5 yrs old.

But can you say that banning the child from the bus will prevent the mother from throwing a fit?

Today, there's too many parents who get all worked up over small problems. Like at pee-wee baseball games, I've seen some nasty stuff going on there with the parents. The things they say to the umpire... wow.

What I don't like is the "My child is precious and wouldn't harm a fly" approach that the mother made. That's what my beef is. She don't show any sign of wanting help for her son. At least, I don't get that impression in the article.

 

[Cheri]

But can you say that banning the child from the bus will prevent the mother from throwing a fit?

If She did threw a fist then we can say she was wrong on her part. But they did not do anything regarding about the bus, only handcuff a 5 yrs old is really a stupid punishment. That means the principal has no brains to solved a problem on the bus, by removing him from the bus to protect the children. Instead he handcuff a child. That is fucked up.

 

[Banjo]

If She did threw a fist then we can say she was wrong on her part. But they did not do anything regarding about the bus, only handcuff a 5 yrs old is really a stupid punishment. That means the principal has no brains to solved a problem on the bus, by removing him from the bus to protect the children. Instead he handcuff a child. That is fucked up.

I do agree that the principal went a bit too far with this idea. However, the mother should had been involved with the decision, and discuss more options on how to improve the situation.

 

[Cheri]

He fights, he strikes somebody practically every day on the bus". Striking is being violent, period. The child is violent because he strikes people on the bus everyday

If he did strikes children on the bus everyday then why wasn't it stopped to begin with? That is part of the bus driver's fault and the principal alone. Should have took care of that matter second time around. Another stupid motion onto the Principal and bus driver.


I cannot believe you guys can't see it that way? Instead of blaming the boy, Blame the school because they let it continue more than once.

 

[Banjo]

If he did strikes children on the bus everyday then why wasn't it stopped to begin with? That is part of the bus driver's fault and the principal alone. Should have took care of that matter second time around. Another stupid motion onto the Principal and bus driver.

I cannot believe you guys can't see it that way? Instead of blaming the boy, Blame the school because they let it continue more than once.

I'm not blaming the boy for anything. These problems can be related to poor parenting, or poor diet like Magatsu said. The truth is, we don't know if any previous suspensions went into effect as a result of the violence on bus.

The principal has said that he've focused on the kid more than any other students in the school. Apparently, the child is a real problem, and something need to be done about it.

The article itself is short and don't have much details to provide. Myself, I think they should had kept it out of the newspaper and resolve it in private. It's a matter of discipline that need to take place, with the mother involved in the decision-making processes.

 

[Wolfboy]

Well thats kinda harsh but that boy gotta learn.

 

[Cheri]

The principal has said that he've focused on the kid more than any other students in the school. Apparently, the child is a real problem, and something need to be done about it.

Same thing with my son's school this kid that the teacher has to spend all her attention to because he cannot keep himself under control. Most of the time she either call the parent to pick up the kid or she send the kid to the office. I'm glad my son's school is nothing like that school which the Principal did on that kid. Nobody would accept that kind of punishment not even the parent. And I am a parent myself and I would never accept that kind of punishment.

 

[Roadrunner]

MOD NOTE:

As this thread is a controversial and a hotly debatable subject, name-callings, finger-pointing, bashing anyone's ideas/thoughts/opinions isn't going to be tolerated here, otherwise this thread will find itself locked up and tossed out...several posts have already been removed and one line deleted (taken out)....

PLEASE be considerate to other members' views or opinions without having to resort to the idea that ONLY a certain view is the right one...every member here is entitled to their own assumptions and allowed to give their own feedback without having to be 'gunned' down with harshness....

That being said, now let's continue with this thread in a more civilized and appropriate manner where all members can debate rationally without having any finger-pointing against the views expressed by others....

Thank-you!

 

[SpiceHD]

if banning the kid from the bus... that would mean the mother get punished for it.. not the kid. who knows.. . maybe the kids were picking or teasing this kid causing this kid to fight everyday and being caught. or the kid might have something that he/she is having problem with but doesnt know how to vent it out properly and chose to use kids as a beating bag. no one is at fault because we do not know what the REAL problem is. everyone knows theres a problem.. everyone is trying to figure a solution .. but no one knows WHY it s happening.

principal might be wrong in his own solution, bus driver might be wrong for not doing anything about it, mother may be wrong for not dealing wiht it. but it truly doesnt matter because they havent found the real reason behind the problem and because of that the kid may continue do so .

 

[Mommyof3]

Tough. He should be handcuffed and understand that it is what happens if he doesn't abide with rules. He was violent. You are gonna let him hurt others? No?

-jeff

Jeff,
I disagree with you. The Teacher should Remove him out of room and sent him to Principle's Room. So he should Call his mother to come in and have a meetings with his son. Maybe his son have AHAD/ADD or simply behavior problems. They should work it out together and make it work better for her son's behavior. What did Principle done to him which is Child Abuse without Mother's Permisson. I think he do wrong to teach him and destory boy's emotions which fear and confused. Bad Choice!!! Tsk Tsk Tsk!!!
Mommyof3

 

[VamPyroX]

The handcuffs part may have been going too far... but the kid deserved it in some ways. The school can't always be taking care of our kids all the time. If the kids do not behave, we can't just keep saying, "be good now!" and let them go. There should be some minor limits towards punishments... instead of considering all kinds of punishments as "child abuse".

 

[Cheri]

The handcuffs part may have been going too far... but the kid deserved it in some ways. The school can't always be taking care of our kids all the time. If the kids do not behave, we can't just keep saying, "be good now!" and let them go. There should be some minor limits towards punishments... instead of considering all kinds of punishments as "child abuse".

No, the kid does not deserved that kind of punishment at all. It happened on the bus it should have took care of it from the second time it happen. They have rules set at every school and its wise to use it not wise to make choices on your own set of rules. It will backfire right at you, and sure did to the Principal. Not everything is consider as child abuse but what the Principal did is child abuse, because do every school follow that kind of punishment? Not.

Have you seen couple 5 yrs old? You see how small they are? You think every child is perfect? no, Nobody knows what really happened on that bus what cause the boy to act that way. We cannot make judgment upon the boy because there only one side the Principal side.


Some people here aren't no parent and have no idea how a child would feel, because those who aren't parent don't walk the parent's feet. It easy to judge the child when they are not parent themselves. It's true.

 

[Taylor]

Good for you, Taylor.
It is my understanding that exaggerating something backfires.
I remember those shows well.
Do you, Taylor?? grrrr

Tell the truth.
Those Scare Me shows backfired.
They committed MORE crime.

Beowulf, I'm not sure I'm understanding your comments...Did you mean I was exaggerating something?

I remember that there was a lot of interest in the Scared Straight program in the late 70’s and early 80’s. A lot of people (including some of my professors) were touting it as a highly effective deterrent to future criminal behavior. Didn’t subsequent studies show, however, that the Scared Straight program was only minimally effective?

As for minimally effective, that very well could be, especially since I haven't heard much about it recently. I know in the case of my friend, it worked and he will admit that was his turning point.

The same could be said about drug abuse..some programs work for some people, while other programs prove to be the solution. In the case of my friend, he couldn't fathom being behind bars for 3 to 5 years..which he would have gotten had he been an adult at the time.

As for me, it was positive influences in my life that kept me. Not to get personal, but I spent my childhood going from home to home to home. In my teenage years, I became involved in a gang (although we didn't call it a gang, that is what it was). Many of the people I hung out with at that time are in jail now. Some didn't make it to see the age of 20. I had a few positives in my life that kept me out of trouble and I went on to do some very positive things with my life.

The reason I mention this is I think many of our children today are lacking positive influences and 'heroes' like we used to have. While I disagree with the principles actions, I do have an idea of what he was trying to accomplish and his heart was in the right place...I don't believe he was doing it to be mean...he was trying to help the kid (abeit in a very wrong manner).