22 year old guy having sex with a 16 year old girl

[Maria]

There's no magical change when someone turns 18 that suddenly makes them adult. Hell, I know some 40-year-olds with the maturity of a 10-year-old.

Seriously ?

 

[morbid-mongoose]

Seriously ?

Yup. Needless to say I don't like them and try to avoid them, but I know 'em.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Hmm.. I don't vote at all because I can't judge what you should be mad or not.

About this situation, well, my great grandparents are 10 years old apart, my grandparents are 7 years old apart, my uncle and anut are about 8 years old apart, there is lot of people I've seen that are about less than 10 years old apart. 22 years old man and 16 years old girl are only 6 years old apart, that is not really a big thing to me while I hang out with people who are about 4 or over, even some over 30 years old at the MOST while I was only 20 years old. During my high school, I always hang out with my friends who already graduated from school more than other friends that I hang out at my school. My parents seems doesn't really have much of problem, they ratherly glad that I was very independent and taking care of myself, return home on time before 10 pm, doing my homeworks, wash my own lanudry, clean my own room and my own mess around the house, etc.

I did, somehow, argued with my parents that I should drop out the school because I thought I was too mature to attend more schools in high school, but I failed and stayed in the school. I would assumed that is the only one thing my parents would ever taught me during my high school, never give up on anything that are important for me.

My parents, oddly, doesn't care if I was out party and get drunk, or making any troubles, or whatever, they just don't want me to depend on them to take care of my consquences, they want ME to take care of my own troubles. They want me to be ADULT, not a teenager or kids.

I will be the same as my parents when I have a child. If my child got pregnanted or have the baby with his gf, I would help them how to be parents, help them to learn through in the out REAL world. Also I will put them on effort to stay in high school so that they can learn how to go to the college or working while having the children same time.

I just don't want to put so much of rules over them because it makes me feel like they are not learning anything if they can't do anything on their own, but ratherly let them learn their experience in the real world.

wow, your description sound exact same as European´s way like that. Are you really sure that you & your parents are an American?

Yes, it will create more problems if you keep teenager from grow into mature young adult.

Anyway, if my 16 years old daughter is pregnant by 22 years old guy. What I do is support her with child no matter what, and also support her as well if she is happy with guy. I would not treat guy like dirt like that or destory guy´s life. I only do something if my daughter was being rape or force to have sex by them..., that´s all.

My good friend´s sister´s 16 years old daughter was pregnant by 21 years old guy at 5 years ago. They have a baby boy - They married last 07.07.07.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

There's no magical change when someone turns 18 that suddenly makes them adult. Hell, I know some 40-year-olds with the maturity of a 10-year-old.

Yeah, I know.... I often seen that some adult act like immaturity child. Why? Because their parents keep their children from grow up into maturity young adult. They never learn what right or wrong...

 

[sara1981]

my vote says yes!

because 16 years old is teenager cant have sex with adult without knowledges of parents who never knew about that man!

im sure mostly parents need supervisor about kids when gone out with right guys from school like high school less than stranger man im sure parents need focus about kids cant allowed have sex with over 20's they can arrest! if parents were away and teenager have sex with stranger they never knew and also have pregnant with that man! im not joking!

 

[morbid-mongoose]

because 16 years old is teenager cant have sex with adult without knowledges of parents who never knew about that man!

I agree. I don't care if you're 13 or 30- the parents have a right to know who their kid is dating, regardless of that person's age.

 

[Tousi]

Its real difficult going forward with this subject because of the European angle. For example, in Germany, the age of sexual consent is 14; however, it is illegal for someone over the age of 21 to have sex with someone who is 14 IF that older person is taking advantage.......

 

[Hwy99]

wow, your description sound exact same as European´s way like that. Are you really sure that you & your parents are an American?

Really? I didn't know that lol.. Yes I am American, but my great grandparents/grandparents from my mom's side are from Germany and Greece, our family is strongly influenced by European culture.

Yes, it will create more problems if you keep teenager from grow into mature young adult.

I argee with you, it is hard to treat teenagers like a young adult as speaking of my experience.

Anyway, if my 16 years old daughter is pregnant by 22 years old guy. What I do is support her with child no matter what, and also support her as well if she is happy with guy. I would not treat guy like dirt like that or destory guy´s life. I only do something if my daughter was being rape or force to have sex by them..., that´s all.

I would do the same as you, I would never treat the guy dirty or shit just unless if he rape or hurt or force anything to the daughter.

My good friend´s sister´s 16 years old daughter was pregnant by 21 years old guy at 5 years ago. They have a baby boy - They married last 07.07.07.

Yupp that is not really different than my mom became first pregnanted when she was 18 while my dad was 21.

 

[shel90]

Teenagers should be enjoying the time of their lives to finish high school and making great memories and go to college not screw their life up with someone who is adults think it okay to have sex with a teenagers is wrong. Maybe to some people age is a number but when it comes to kids.. that is a whole different story.

I agree! My husband said he will have his gun ready if anyone should do that to my daughter. It is SO scary to have kids, isnt it?

 

[Tousi]

I don't think you have any right to be angry. This guy's from Canada where in many places it's legal to consent at the age of 16. That'd be like you being angry at your daughter for consenting at 18. If that's the case, then you really do have bigger problems.

Hey, he was ASKING; no need to tear off his head.

 

[shel90]

There's no magical change when someone turns 18 that suddenly makes them adult. Hell, I know some 40-year-olds with the maturity of a 10-year-old.

Your posts show me that u are very mature for your age! I agree with u cuz my dad is 57 years old and I feel more mature than he is. No wonder my mom divorced him. I love my dad but his immaturity annoys me.

 

[Tousi]

See what I posted above at #27? Age of consent in Germany being 14 makes for a sticky discussion. The age of consent in America used to be 14 but that was like 150 years ago, lol.

 

[jillio]

There's no magical change when someone turns 18 that suddenly makes them adult. Hell, I know some 40-year-olds with the maturity of a 10-year-old.

Very good point. And the biological fact is that the frontal lobe of girls mature 2-3 years sooner than the frontal lobes of males. So, mentally a 18 year old girl and a 21 year old male are approximately the same when it comes to maturity and critical thinking skills.

My question....where were the parents of the 16 year old and were they teaching her values prior to the time that this occurred?

 

[jillio]

Yup. Needless to say I don't like them and try to avoid them, but I know 'em.

Nothing more annoying than a 40 year old child with adult privileges!

 

[Handsome_Smiley]

I don't care if my daughter is 16 and her bf is 22 or if she is 22 and her bf is 16. No matter her age, I will still be pissed if she is having sex outside of marriage. I want her to be done with high school and atleast half way through college before she lays in bed with a man.

I also know I can't controll who she dates and if she has sex. But I can scare the shit out of bf and hope that helps.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Really? I didn't know that lol.. Yes I am American, but my great grandparents/grandparents from my mom's side are from Germany and Greece, our family is strongly influenced by European culture.

I remember you mentioned in some threads that you are part Greek. wow! I know from your posts that you are pretty open minded and understand how others feeling.

I argee with you, it is hard to treat teenagers like a young adult as speaking of my experience.

Yes, that´s why we exposed our children early with respect and understanding due communicate instead of treat them like kid then later we would get less problem to deal with my teenagers. Now my both boys are pre-teenager and teenager. They know what right or wrong...

I would do the same as you, I would never treat the guy dirty or shit just unless if he rape or hurt or force anything to the daughter.

Exactly... I am mother of 2 sons. My 14 years old son is continue contact with 16 years old girl after met her at 2 weeks holiday in Rome, Italy. Should I and treat girl dirt?... No...but respect my son´s choice for like her because he know her. I let him know how I feeling and do not forbid him anything but explain him that he´s rather too young to be with her yet and focus his education.

Yupp that is not really different than my mom became first pregnanted when she was 18 while my dad was 21.

Interesting, my 24 years old Dad got my 17 years old mom pregnant. (me). Their parents (my grandparents) support them with me instead of treat them dirt or whatever. I thank my Grandparents´s for open-mind and understanding/loving supportive. I can image my Dad would end to register as sex offender or sex molsester for pregnant 17 years old girl if they live in America... *goose bump*

 

[Hwy99]

I remember you mentioned in some threads that you are part Greek. wow! I know from your posts that you are pretty open minded and understand how others feeling.

Of course You are 100 percent Germany right?

Yes, that´s why we exposed our children early with respect and understanding due communicate instead of treat them like kid then later we would get less problem to deal with my teenagers. Now my both boys are pre-teenager and teenager. They know what right or wrong...

Yupp it's not always cool to treat the kids like kids, sometimes I believe how we treat them that could cause them to think that is what they are.

Exactly... I am mother of 2 sons. My 14 years old son is continue contact with 16 years old girl after met her at 2 weeks holiday in Rome, Italy. Should I and treat girl dirt?... No...but respect my son´s choice for like her because he know her. I let him know how I feeling and do not forbid him anything but explain him that he´s rather too young to be with her yet and focus his education.

I am sure you are very good mother to be like that

Interesting, my 24 years old Dad got my 17 years old mom pregnant. (me). Their parents (my grandparents) support them with me instead of treat them dirt or whatever. I thank my Grandparents´s for open-mind and understanding/loving supportive. I can image my Dad would end to register as sex offender or sex molsester for pregnant 17 years old girl if they live in America... *goose bump*

I am so glad that your grandparents are very helpful for you and your husband! Yeah you are lucky that you are not in America, if you are not with him, then you won't have your lovely sons and beautiful life in Germany

Yeah I agree with you, America was taking the age so seriously. Reason why I was so open-minded about this issue because my cousin was 19 years old dating with 16 years old girl, that girl's parents set him as stalker rape and sex offender, they continue arguing till they end up ran away for many miles from the state, stayed there till the girl become 18. They have been together for 5 years now. If my cousin was set up as stalker rape and sex offender, then they won't have a happy life like they was right now.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Of course You are 100 percent Germany right?

No, I am British. I born in Scotland and was raised in London. I married to a German and live in Germany for over 22 years. Scottish generation on my mother´s side and Irish generation on my father´s side.

Yupp it's not always cool to treat the kids like kids, sometimes I believe how we treat them that could cause them to think that is what they are.

I taught my children to respect on adult, no matter what and let them know that the parents are the boss in the house and the teachers/principal are also the boss in school as well. If you didn´t teach your children how to show their respect then they don´t know what respect is about. We show our respect on them as the same they show their respect to us back as well. Example: I don´t choose the menu for my children in the resturant but let them choose any menu what they like.

I am sure you are very good mother to be like that

for compliment... I know that I am good mother but not 100% prefect... I make mistakes sometimes.

I am so glad that your grandparents are very helpful for you and your husband! Yeah you are lucky that you are not in America, if you are not with him, then you won't have your lovely sons and beautiful life in Germany

No, my Grandparents support my parents when they had me. Yes I can image what if my Dad live in America... :Ohno: It destory his life as sex offender for make minor pregnant which is a scary. It´s free of my parents to want each other without their parents interfere.

True, I am proud mother of both sons and enjoy my life in Germany.

Yeah I agree with you, America was taking the age so seriously. Reason why I was so open-minded about this issue because my cousin was 19 years old dating with 16 years old girl, that girl's parents set him as stalker rape and sex offender, they continue arguing till they end up ran away for many miles from the state, stayed there till the girl become 18. They have been together for 5 years now. .

It´s really scary situation.

No wonder, why the problem is created that´s because the parents don´t like guy, their daughter love. It doesn´t solve anything when you threat your daughter to press the charge against guy or a girl use those situation as an excuse to against guy that´s because guy decide to finish with her which is really scary...

If my cousin was set up as stalker rape and sex offender, then they won't have a happy life like they was right now.

Yes that´s right.

 

[morbid-mongoose]

Very good point. And the biological fact is that the frontal lobe of girls mature 2-3 years sooner than the frontal lobes of males. So, mentally a 18 year old girl and a 21 year old male are approximately the same when it comes to maturity and critical thinking skills.

My question....where were the parents of the 16 year old and were they teaching her values prior to the time that this occurred?

Both very good points.

Your posts show me that u are very mature for your age! I agree with u cuz my dad is 57 years old and I feel more mature than he is. No wonder my mom divorced him. I love my dad but his immaturity annoys me.

Thanks.

 

[Hwy99]

No, I am British. I born in Scotland and was raised in London. I married to a German and live in Germany for over 22 years. Scottish generation on my mother´s side and Irish generation on my father´s side.

Ohh I see! Wonderful

I taught my children to respect on adult, no matter what and let them know that the parents are the boss in the house and the teachers/principal are also the boss in school as well. If you didn´t teach your children how to show their respect then they don´t know what respect is about. We show our respect on them as the same they show their respect to us back as well. Example: I don´t choose the menu for my children in the resturant but let them choose any menu what they like.

Yeah my parents let me choose what to eat at resturant when I was little too, but except for unhealthy stuff like sodas. Of course, respect is important thing to learn.

for compliment... I know that I am good mother but not 100% prefect... I make mistakes sometimes.

Yeah no one is perfect anyway

No, my Grandparents support my parents when they had me. Yes I can image what if my Dad live in America... :Ohno: It destory his life as sex offender for make minor pregnant which is a scary. It´s free of my parents to want each other without their parents interfere.

Yeah agree. It's scary..

It´s really scary situation.

No wonder, why the problem is created that´s because the parents don´t like guy, their daughter love. It doesn´t solve anything when you threat your daughter to press the charge against guy or a girl use those situation as an excuse to against guy that´s because guy decide to finish with her which is really scary...






Yes that´s right.

Yeah I agree, it's scary. Charging against daughter's lover, or whatever does not solve the problem really...