I dont think it is so much the words, but rather it is HOW those words were spoken to said person. People think because we are deaf or HoH that we cant tell that they are yelling (which is a stupid assumption altogether). And if we dont respond to them they also believe that we must also be stupid. (again, dumb assumption).
I think the person is going about it the wrong way. She sould simply calmly ask in a normal tone and decibel "Are you deaf?". Most deafies even if they are not oralists they seem to know how to lipread this one question because they get it so much thoroughout their lives.
When someone does this shouting "ARE YOU DEAF?" Respond back loudly - "YES- BUT YOUR SHOUTING IS MAKING IT MORE DIFFICULT TO UNDERSTAND YOU!". I think that would get them to realize - oops, that was not very wise of me to shout the question. *gulp*
