popularity contests and cliques on AD

racheleggert

racheleggert

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I am frankly tired of seeing people who are here for chat and socialization as other think its OK to have popularity contests and clique. In other thread, I do agree with Taylor and few members, I am like him, here for socializing, not making any attention to be popular or join any cliques. I know I am not popular but I noticed some members feel left out as well, and sometimes they end up getting bashed by a cliques or so. I used to think I would be popular here but I matured and I don't care. I used to bash on members and now I don't anymore because I don't want to be childish. Thats why I haven't been here that much because people like me have other things to do in real life instead of sitting on computer all day. I do agree with Rebel in other thread as well. Please no bashing, and thanks! Feel free to share your opnion.
 
I love here. I am here because I would like to share my world with others . Sometimes I get support and try to support others as well. I like some members in here more than my real life friends who are not aware of deaf world ! I like joking and fun ,too. I hate bashing and fighting.

The more I socialize in here with the members ,The better I feel :D
 
Nobody should be popluar, we all should just play nice to each others, even through sometimes that's hard because when a topic gets hot, then a flame war starts, that's when a heated arugment begins, even through we shouldn't personal attacks each others, just debates to the point of the topic at hand.
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Like elsewhere in real world, there are always cliques. Naturally, I am not a part of a clique here on AD despite being here for years. I notice that if I disagree with someone, that person quickly claims that I am not her friend anymore. What happened to friends who embrace diversity? We are not clones - we all come from all walks of life - we come to AD, sharing our experiences and perceptives. I am not here to look for a clone of me but rather learn from others who may disagree with me in a respectful way yet embrace me as a friend but it has not happened yet on AD but in my real life, it always happen. Here, Im an Irish Catholic gal yet my true best friend is an Israeli Jewish woman. I have so many friends who are from all walks of life but we all respect our differences and we know how to debate without taking it personally.

I no longer care if I dont have a personal friend from here on AD as I know I continue to come back here because I truly DO learn a lot. I truly DO see myself opening my eyes when I see someone pointing out issues from her/his perspective.

Due to my thirst of knowledge, I keep coming back to AD despite knowing that I am not popular. Who gives a hoot about that?

I went to a seminar given by many powerful leaders yesterday such as Rudy Guiliani (formerly mayor of NYC), Don Shula, Robert Schuller, Colin Powell, and so on. Each man said that courage means speaking up despite popular ideas. Each man pointed out that every one of our American leaders spoke up despite society s views..such as Martin Luther King, Franklin Roosevelt, Jr, Eleanor Roosevelt, Ronald Reagan......you name it...each one of these leaders spoke up on passion of their own beliefs, believing that they can contribute to this world.

Hence I am still here - I am not here to seek popularity but rather to gain wisdom and apply to my life and hope that I have contributed to SOME members here with my wisdom.

Bottom line - I would rather have a few REAL friends than 100 fake aquaintances.
 
gemtun.....

great posting i concur with you in every aspect all my friends are from the AIM/AOL/ IRL friends outside of AD and i was brought in here by one that KNOWS me irl and said this would be a place to learn more about socialism and idealism, naturally i came for that, but not for the fights and the BS... i have been a member here since 2003 and i naturally am glad i am here. and i won't let popularity nor clique turn me away.. its for the reality of the poeple that needs to learn the one word....

RESPECT
 
javapride said:
gemtun.....

great posting i concur with you in every aspect all my friends are from the AIM/AOL/ IRL friends outside of AD and i was brought in here by one that KNOWS me irl and said this would be a place to learn more about socialism and idealism, naturally i came for that, but not for the fights and the BS... i have been a member here since 2003 and i naturally am glad i am here. and i won't let popularity nor clique turn me away.. its for the reality of the poeple that needs to learn the one word....

RESPECT
Click to expand...

AMEN but may I add one more thing?

OPEN MIND is the KEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We all learn MORE from differences than similiarities!!!!!!!!!!!!! What is so threatening about learning from someone who is totally different from us?

I see that most people are threatened by people who dare to think/believe/act DIFFERENTLY due to their passions!

Who needs conformity? Who needs McDonalds, Burger King, Gap, and so on ???They all reek of conformity.

What is wrong with thinking outside the box??????????
 
Gemtun said:
AMEN but may I add one more thing?

OPEN MIND is the KEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We all learn MORE from differences than similiarities!!!!!!!!!!!!! What is so threatening about learning from someone who is totally different from us?

I see that most people are threatened by people who dare to think/believe/act DIFFERENTLY due to their passions!

Who needs conformity? Who needs McDonalds, Burger King, Gap, and so on ???They all reek of conformity.

What is wrong with thinking outside the box??????????
Click to expand...

*A*M*E*N*


I'm not come here to make popular myself but collect experiences from anyone here... I need to learn cons/pros on both sides until I decide what right or wrong... It's good education for us... I beleive that any forums is a good education for us... Simple is respect when we see different... Agree to disagree with debate is welcome....

I see the problem is the some people deny to consider the new ideas/information/suggestion or other people's POV...
 
Liebling:-))) said:
*A*M*E*N*
I need to learn cons/pros on both sides until I decide what right or wrong... It's good education for us... I beleive that any forums is a good education for us... Simple is respect when we see different... Agree to disagree with debate is welcome....

I see the problem is the some people deny to consider the new ideas/information/suggestion or other people's POV...
Click to expand...

I have no problems with pro and cons, but throwing in personal attacks is not even necessary. I can understand when a topic gets hot, everyone is biting each others heads off, but there is no reason to get personal, it's just a discussion to the topic at hand.

Like for example when someone had an abortion, labeling them murder is personal attack, when someone has their cat declawed, saying they have no business being pet owners is also personal attack. Members have to think about other members feelings, because when someone throws in personal attack, that is when a thread starts going in a flame war. Respect is the key. ;)
 
popularity is just an reputation we dont need popularity unless you re running for mayor/government/president other than that popularity not needed unless you re an business owner then that s different the more popular you are the more people ll stop by to buy your stuff
 
Cheri said:
I have no problems with pro and cons, but throwing in personal attacks is not even necessary. I can understand when a topic gets hot, everyone is biting each others heads off, but there is no reason to get personal, it's just a discussion to the topic at hand.

Like for example when someone had an abortion, labeling them murder is personal attack, when someone has their cat declawed, saying they have no business being pet owners is also personal attack. Members have to think about other members feelings, because when someone throws in personal attack, that is when a thread starts going in a flame war. Respect is the key. ;)
Click to expand...

Yes I can understand and agree that personal attacks is not necassary in debate with agree to disagree but....

I do not consider personal attack when you express your feeling in your own post in general way instead of quote someone´s post.... Example: Abortion or CI babies/toddlers. It´s personal attack when you quoted someone´s post telling them off in abortion, CI threads or whatever that they are cruel, murder, selfish, etc. It´s not personal attack when you disagree their POV then quote their post explain why in respect way why you disagree or agree to.... instead of jump angrily on them or take their post personal... IMO.
 
Cheri said:
I have no problems with pro and cons, but throwing in personal attacks is not even necessary. I can understand when a topic gets hot, everyone is biting each others heads off, but there is no reason to get personal, it's just a discussion to the topic at hand.

Like for example when someone had an abortion, labeling them murder is personal attack, when someone has their cat declawed, saying they have no business being pet owners is also personal attack. Members have to think about other members feelings, because when someone throws in personal attack, that is when a thread starts going in a flame war. Respect is the key. ;)
Click to expand...


AMEN!!!! :gpost:
 
GalaxyAngel said:
who needs popluar?

I don't need it..
Just I want regluar person like everyone..
Click to expand...


:werd: I rather to be myself than wanna-to-be or those who want me to be someone I am NOT...


I'm who I am, and I don't give a hoot what others think of me....
 
Hmm, I've been here for years and I haven't noticed cliques. Which ones were y'all referring to?

I'd like to make a point. Sometimes it is not easy relating to people who think the worst of you already. I have noticed that some people are ADDICTED to having villains in their lives so they can make an excuse to not look at the real problems and make positive changes for themselves.

Gemtun, I like the way you think. I often think of Martin Luther King Jr and the great ones who were brave to go against popular (and clannish?) opinion in their times. If they could do it, we can do it too! Just be yourself, and there is nothing wrong with it! You will inspire many others by just doing that!!

I'd like to share a few points on cliques and relationships on forums. You will be surprised who looks up to you! Advocate good fellowship among members here and show people how you like it done. Do not accept action/behavior that divides a community. Those are easy to spot if you know where to find them. Doing something about it is a different story. Do y'all have suggestions?
 
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