Hello,
My name is Keith. I have an introduction and a sort of question/dilemma. I'm pretty nervous about this so bear with me.
For starters, I am a hearing person. I have had the pleasure twice (now three times) to have had Deaf people in my life. The first was after my father remarried. His mother in law was (born) Deaf. When I was a child, she would teach me sign, and I would also learn what I could from the book they had. (This was 30 years ago, the book was old even back then, and was not very good!) Unfortunately she passed away. She was the coolest lady and I have only fond memories of her.
The second was a friend I met through a classmate in high school. He also was Deaf, however he had hearing implants which helped him a little. Another cool guy who I lost contact with after leaving school. My first experience with a TTY (at least he was using one, I had an operator typing away) was a doozy.
I learned a lot from him about being able to communicate not only without using your voice (of course) but without even your hands! It's amazing how much can be communicated through body language.
I play in a band, and the singer is a CODA and is fluent in ASL. We have recently practiced at his parents house who I'll call Mr and Mrs S. (It's actually quite convenient not having anyone concerned about the loud noise...
) They are both very cool people as well. Strangely it seems I have a Deaf person in my life about every 10 years or so... heh. It has been great communicating with them (with my limited ASL) and they are very understanding. They even assigned me a Sign name (which to me was a real honor). Deaf people also have some wild stories!
I have been interested in ASL since I was a child and was first exposed to it by my grandmother in law. I have recently put in a tremendous effort to learn not only what little sign I lost, but as much as I can new. I think sign language is not only beautiful but brilliant in how it can convey so much information in so many different ways and still be efficient. Sadly we don't practice at the singers parents house any longer, so for the third time I have lost contact with the only Deaf people I know and the only practical way for me to use a language I enjoy so much. I have tried looking on YouTube, etc for videos of people signing, but it's either college students doing songs (which many times look to me like they need to learn some more... but I'm no expert) or native signers which just go sooooo fast that I'm pausing every other sign.
So here is my question/dilemma. I would like to make friends with more Deaf people as my experience has always been a good one. The sense of community I have experienced amazes me. While I'll never experience that, it still intrigues me. It was suggested by Mrs. S to go to a Deaf club (silent social, etc.) The issue I have is, part of the reason (but not the only) I would even go to one is to help me learn the language. If I were a Deaf person, and I went to a club where I wanted to have fun, I would probably get quickly tired of people coming up to me to "use" me for ASL practice, thus I don't want to appear to do that to anyone else. I feel that it is a selfish reason, thus do not want to burden anyone. In addition, it's not easy for me to make "random" friends unless there is something in common (other than language. I wouldn't go to a coffee house to randomly talk to people either. Maybe it's a New England thing, I dunno). Ironically, the main reason it's hard for me to socialize in general is I find many people usually don't say anything even though their mouth is moving...
I have tried looking in my area for an ASL tutor but am not finding anyone in my area nor any classes. I asked Mrs S if she knew any tutors, though she keeps forgetting to ask around... heh. I would really love to learn the language more For whatever reason, the language makes perfect sense to me learning it, and has come to me fairly easy so far. (I still have a long way to go, but I was holding decent conversations after only a couple months). It's my receptive skills that are really lacking. (no exposure...)
The flipside of all this... I have been reading not only here, but searching the internet in general, and am seeing many situations where Deaf people can sometimes tend to shun hearing people who make attempts to learn the culture and language. Honestly I don't blame them one bit based on much of the idiocy that hearing people can demonstrate. ("Why learn ASL? All Deaf people can read lips!" *facepalm*
) However this does make me a little shy as I am very sensitive to people's issues and what they would have to go through. I haven't had to experience them, but have sometimes seen it first hand.
So, in the interest of not making this a novel, what does a person like me do to reestablish a relationship with a community/culture without being an outcast myself, and without just intruding on something that is going perfectly fine without me?
OK, that's my intro... wait... you lasted this long reading this? :jaw:
K
My name is Keith. I have an introduction and a sort of question/dilemma. I'm pretty nervous about this so bear with me.
For starters, I am a hearing person. I have had the pleasure twice (now three times) to have had Deaf people in my life. The first was after my father remarried. His mother in law was (born) Deaf. When I was a child, she would teach me sign, and I would also learn what I could from the book they had. (This was 30 years ago, the book was old even back then, and was not very good!) Unfortunately she passed away. She was the coolest lady and I have only fond memories of her.
The second was a friend I met through a classmate in high school. He also was Deaf, however he had hearing implants which helped him a little. Another cool guy who I lost contact with after leaving school. My first experience with a TTY (at least he was using one, I had an operator typing away) was a doozy.
I learned a lot from him about being able to communicate not only without using your voice (of course) but without even your hands! It's amazing how much can be communicated through body language.I play in a band, and the singer is a CODA and is fluent in ASL. We have recently practiced at his parents house who I'll call Mr and Mrs S. (It's actually quite convenient not having anyone concerned about the loud noise...
) They are both very cool people as well. Strangely it seems I have a Deaf person in my life about every 10 years or so... heh. It has been great communicating with them (with my limited ASL) and they are very understanding. They even assigned me a Sign name (which to me was a real honor). Deaf people also have some wild stories!I have been interested in ASL since I was a child and was first exposed to it by my grandmother in law. I have recently put in a tremendous effort to learn not only what little sign I lost, but as much as I can new. I think sign language is not only beautiful but brilliant in how it can convey so much information in so many different ways and still be efficient. Sadly we don't practice at the singers parents house any longer, so for the third time I have lost contact with the only Deaf people I know and the only practical way for me to use a language I enjoy so much. I have tried looking on YouTube, etc for videos of people signing, but it's either college students doing songs (which many times look to me like they need to learn some more... but I'm no expert) or native signers which just go sooooo fast that I'm pausing every other sign.
So here is my question/dilemma. I would like to make friends with more Deaf people as my experience has always been a good one. The sense of community I have experienced amazes me. While I'll never experience that, it still intrigues me. It was suggested by Mrs. S to go to a Deaf club (silent social, etc.) The issue I have is, part of the reason (but not the only) I would even go to one is to help me learn the language. If I were a Deaf person, and I went to a club where I wanted to have fun, I would probably get quickly tired of people coming up to me to "use" me for ASL practice, thus I don't want to appear to do that to anyone else. I feel that it is a selfish reason, thus do not want to burden anyone. In addition, it's not easy for me to make "random" friends unless there is something in common (other than language. I wouldn't go to a coffee house to randomly talk to people either. Maybe it's a New England thing, I dunno). Ironically, the main reason it's hard for me to socialize in general is I find many people usually don't say anything even though their mouth is moving...
I have tried looking in my area for an ASL tutor but am not finding anyone in my area nor any classes. I asked Mrs S if she knew any tutors, though she keeps forgetting to ask around... heh. I would really love to learn the language more For whatever reason, the language makes perfect sense to me learning it, and has come to me fairly easy so far. (I still have a long way to go, but I was holding decent conversations after only a couple months). It's my receptive skills that are really lacking. (no exposure...)
The flipside of all this... I have been reading not only here, but searching the internet in general, and am seeing many situations where Deaf people can sometimes tend to shun hearing people who make attempts to learn the culture and language. Honestly I don't blame them one bit based on much of the idiocy that hearing people can demonstrate. ("Why learn ASL? All Deaf people can read lips!" *facepalm*
) However this does make me a little shy as I am very sensitive to people's issues and what they would have to go through. I haven't had to experience them, but have sometimes seen it first hand.So, in the interest of not making this a novel, what does a person like me do to reestablish a relationship with a community/culture without being an outcast myself, and without just intruding on something that is going perfectly fine without me?
OK, that's my intro... wait... you lasted this long reading this? :jaw:
K
