Losing intrest in hearing girls

marcyp06

marcyp06

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The more immersed I become in the Deaf world, in this culture as a whole, the more I lose interest in the thought of being in a relationship with a hearing girl. I have said for a long time that I refuse to be in a relationship with someone who is not willing to learn ASL. I will soon be in school to be an interpereter and I plan to adopt deaf children, and I want to have full and total communication in my household. So having a signing partner is a must for me.
I also have days where I just want to be voice off and silence all the un-neccesary noise in life. I'm sure there are other hearing people out there somewhere that may feel the same, and I could meet one of those people. I've just never felt so... right... as when I was dating my Deaf ex. I have a long way to go before I feel like I fully belong in this world, but it has already taken hold of my heart and mind. I haven't discussed this with many people as I don't really think its any of their business who I'm interested in until I'm in a relationship with someone. But I am curious to get peoples perspective on here.
 
You are the only person that matters when it comes to who you fall in love with. Its your choice and your choice alone. I can't speak for how the deaf community feels about this because I am not deaf, but it sounds like you now what you want and to hell with anyone who opposes that. I would say to continue to live your life, and if you find a hearing girl that shares the same passions as you do then great or if you find a deaf girl then thats great as well. Its all up to you and only you.

Good luck
 
What if there's a hearing girl that's "The One"--Better than any other deaf girls you could have dated? I suggest keeping an open mind to any girls, deaf or hearing. You never know. You might think most hearing girls are like that way, but then, there could be an exception to the rule.
 
I would never close my options to any group of people. I'm a strong believer in being attracted to the person as an individual, not because they have this or don't do that, etc. I just happen to be more attrated to and interested in deaf girls as a whole.
 
marcyp06 said:
I would never close my options to any group of people. I'm a strong believer in being attracted to the person as an individual, not because they have this or don't do that, etc. I just happen to be more attrated to and interested in deaf girls as a whole.
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nothings wrong with that,i know most hoh and deaf have a diffrent view of life in general and thats prob what your attracted to.
 
What about CODAs?
I've just never felt so... right... as when I was dating my Deaf ex.
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I totally and completely understand. You feel like you belong in the culture, and like another person gets it about being Deaf.
 
I totally agreed with your every words, Marcy. It's BETTER SAFE than SORRY!! Believe it or not, there's a report somewhere about the high percent of failed marriage between deaf and hearing spouses. 88%, that is. My partner had been thru with his last two hearing ex-girlfriends that didn't work out due to the communication issues and other issues related to hearing loss. But the very last one, who knew ASL but she took an awful advantage of him in such a bad way that scarred my bf's forever. So that he learned his lesson not to trust a hearing woman in the relationship ever again. Needless to say, in reality I've met more deaf persons who were dumped by their hearing exes than hearing-hearing relationships.
 
katz4life said:
I totally agreed with your every words, Marcy. It's BETTER SAFE than SORRY!! Believe it or not, there's a report somewhere about the high percent of failed marriage between deaf and hearing spouses. 88%, that is. My partner had been thru with her last two ex-girlfriends that didn't work ou due to the communication issues and other issues related to hearing loss. But the very last one, who knew ASL but she took an awful advantage of him in such a bad way that scarred my bf's forever. So that he learned his lesson not to trust a hearing woman in the relationship ever again. Needless to say, in reality I've met more deaf persons who were dumped by their hearing exes than hearing-hearing relationships.
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Again, there's always exceptions to this. Don't close yourself to anyone else just because it happened to someone doesn't mean it will always happen to you. My deaf best friend is currently in a happy marriage to a hearing man, and they are few years strong. The probability for such relationship cases isn't either 0 or 1, unfortunately.
 
sheila022 said:
Again, there's always exceptions to this. Don't close yourself to anyone else just because it happened to someone doesn't mean it will always happen to you. My deaf best friend is currently in a happy marriage to a hearing man, and they are few years strong. The probability for such relationship cases isn't either 0 or 1, unfortunately.
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Probability rate in successful deaf-hearing marriage is still a rare, though.
 
posts from hell said:
I refer you guys to her signature.
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Yeah, I clearly can see that...my friend from Florida he had losing his hearings while he was young and he was considered as HOH and speaks very well just like a hearing person. Unfortuately, his newlywed wife gave him up after she found out he had a hearing loss. Pretty cruel, eh?
 
My ex and I didn't break up because I was hearing, but now she is in a relationship with another deaf girl and their relationships is very strong, I do believe their shared language and culture have a lot to do with that. No matter how emmersed I become in the Deaf worl I will never have those experiences and memories of growing up Deaf.
One of my good friends is deaf and married to a hearing man. They met at Gallaudet and I've never seen a happier couple.
 
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