Letting People Know Your Preferences

BecLak

BecLak

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jun 19, 2009
Messages
2,372
Reaction score
60
How do you let people know about your preferences? What is your preferred method? Do you tell people outright that you are Deaf? Do you produce a card, if so, how do you word it? Or a notebook? Do you just sign and point? How many of you have an official Hearing Dog that accompanies you in public places?
 
I personally think to produce a card would be helpful. Also a combination of these things. What works best for you? Are you open in public about being deaf? Or do you prefer to 'hide' it and why?
 
I'm totally open about being deaf. If somebody in a public place starts talking to me, and if I understand them, then I respond back and sometimes I see a "glimmer of understanding" go off in their eyes -- they've registered that I'm deaf. If we don't get that far because I didn't understand them the first time, then I'm not one bit shy about saying that I am deaf, and to please repeat themselves.
 
Alleycat, I'm not shy now either :) but most people don't believe I am severely deaf because I can speak quite well. Although I can hear some, I am more deaf than hearing. Since recently meeting the Deaf community here at AD, I have discovered my identity in being deaf. I want to openly let people know I am deaf instead of 'fooling' them I can hear like I had been taught to do in the past. Better late than never. :)
 
It depends on where I am, and with whom I speak to.

Sometimes gesture such as hands patting your ears willl enlighten people if they don't understand you. You could always use your mobile phone and type the word 'deaf' on and show it to people.

Don't care if people know I'm deaf or not, though.

Am glad to hear you've slowly started developing your deaf identity and learning a bit of sign language. Are you learning Auslan or Thai Sign Language? Just curious.

If I end up in Thailand, I hope we'll meet. :)
 
Miss-Delectable said:
It depends on where I am, and with whom I speak to.

Sometimes gesture such as hands patting your ears willl enlighten people if they don't understand you. You could always use your mobile phone and type the word 'deaf' on and show it to people.

Don't care if people know I'm deaf or not, though.

Am glad to hear you've slowly started developing your deaf identity and learning a bit of sign language. Are you learning Auslan or Thai Sign Language? Just curious.

If I end up in Thailand, I hope we'll meet. :)
Click to expand...

MD, If you are in Thailand anytime, you are most welcome :D. I come back and forth to Australia from time to time. I understand a lot of Auslan now, though am still practicing to use it myself, I am teaching my hearing kids at the same time I am learning it, I haven't had much opportunity to fully converse in it with other Auslan users. I know a little ASL as well (kindy level). No, I don't know any TSL. I don't know anyone from the Thai Deaf community.
 
Last edited:
Being that I am still quite verbal, I speak, but I do let everyone know that I am deaf and need to see their face when they speak. I have recently begun to sign as I speak, but people look at me like I am nuts.
 
I'm open to a lot of things. I don't really make any preference unless it bothers me or it's coming from a person who I'm comfortable with.
 
BecLak said:
Alleycat, I'm not shy now either :) but most people don't believe I am severely deaf because I can speak quite well. Although I can hear some, I am more deaf than hearing. Since recently meeting the Deaf community here at AD, I have discovered my identity in being deaf. I want to openly let people know I am deaf instead of 'fooling' them I can hear like I had been taught to do in the past. Better late than never. :)
Click to expand...

My son encounters the same thing. With strangers, he will usually wait until they ask him where he is from (thinking that he has a foreign accent) and then lets them know that he is deaf.
 
With any strangers I use paper and pen so they would know I am Deaf from the start. If some not sure then I would say I am Deaf on paper.
 
i don't go around with papers or cards but do warn people before anything happens that i am deaf. that way i can see how comfortable the person i am faced with is about my deafness and go from there. just this morning at the hardware store i went thru this with a few people and the contractors i am using. it is helpful that i speak well but it also helps that a little prep helps. gets them to make their brain work on ways to communicate. 90%of the time this is effective. the other times takes plan B.
 
It all depends on my mood and the situation. However, I dont hide my deafness from people.
 
I don't tell people that I'll meet for a only a few seconds that I'm deaf unless I'm in a noisy enviroment or if I need to. I tell everyone else I'm deaf.
 
There's a good side of telling and not telling that ur deaf.....Actually, if there is someone you'd rather avoid or ur just not in the mood to talk, once they see ur deaf, they move on....whenever we get phone calls (telemarketers)....my son says, "she's deaf" and they hang up autotmatically...which is a good thing, I believe!
Some things to be aware of, tho'. There are some bad people out there, and when they find out ur deaf....they feel you're fair game for a break-in.....or try to swindle you for $$.
 
I have the same problem as you Beclak. Because my speech "doesn't sound deaf" (hearie quote) then ppl think I'm lying or they forget that I need to lipread them and forget to look at me. Even one family member (mommy dearest) thinks I'm faking. Now granted we aren't close and only talk at family functions, last yr I had enough of her stupid games ("I was testing you and you responded well enough, and you didn't even know it"):shock: I told her that as I am on disability (for heart condition not deaf) I would not be wearing HA's worth $5000 and have another $2000 worth of "deaf toys" at my home paid for by the province if I couldn't prove medically that I needed them!
That shut her up, or at least I think it did..I turned my head and magically her voice dissapeared :laugh2: I now only speak to friends and family and for strangers (clerks, doctors etc) I sign or write to them. I have no problem saying I'm deaf to whoever. I would love to have a card for deaf as I have one for my pacemaker. I think that would make life so much easier!
 
srlevesque said:
I have the same problem as you Beclak. Because my speech "doesn't sound deaf" (hearie quote) then ppl think I'm lying or they forget that I need to lipread them and forget to look at me. Even one family member (mommy dearest) thinks I'm faking. Now granted we aren't close and only talk at family functions, last yr I had enough of her stupid games ("I was testing you and you responded well enough, and you didn't even know it"):shock: I told her that as I am on disability (for heart condition not deaf) I would not be wearing HA's worth $5000 and have another $2000 worth of "deaf toys" at my home paid for by the province if I couldn't prove medically that I needed them!
That shut her up, or at least I think it did..I turned my head and magically her voice dissapeared :laugh2: I now only speak to friends and family and for strangers (clerks, doctors etc) I sign or write to them. I have no problem saying I'm deaf to whoever. I would love to have a card for deaf as I have one for my pacemaker. I think that would make life so much easier!
Click to expand...

If you were to create your own card, how would you word it?
 
BHA have a card to give out for everyone, but nothing as specialised as this.
 
KristinaB said:
You could word them something like this. These are visor card for the deaf or hard of hearing.

Visor Cards—Bridging the Communications Gap When Stopped by the Police
Click to expand...

Wow these are brilliant! I am going to tell the Deaf club here about this, The very first night that I met a cpl of deafies here (there is only 15 or so) both of the guys were telling me about being pulled over by the police and the nightmare it became. Even tho one had a hearing wife screaming at the officer that he is deaf and she needs to sign for him. The sad part is they were stopped for minor traffic offenses. Not fleeing the scene of a crime! Altho I would make changes for me as I am Deaf but I can speak so I would merge some of the 2 cards together to fit my situation. I may not like speaking to strangers, but you bet your ass I would to the police!! Thank god that up in Canada police seem to be less aggresive and don't tend to shoot first ask later, I'd be really freaked in countries like the States.
Well done on the find!:ty:
 
Back
Top