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I would go and have no expectations. But if she abused you, then I don't know....it all depends on the nature of the abuse. I would go anyway just to meet the baby but then you may feel turmoil inside when you do meet the baby and see her being a lovey with it, kwim? You were only 11 when you last saw her. I don't know why it's been 9 years. I tend to hold a grudge when someone hurts me, esp physically. So, can you give me the details on the abuse?