Songbird2319
New Member
- Joined
- Jun 1, 2015
- Messages
- 40
- Reaction score
- 0
I dunno of this counts for this thread but whatever.
I miss my mommy.
Let me explain. My mom and I were outwardly very close when I way little. She was my favorite person. She stayed with me till I was old enough for kindergarten. And it was amazing... Most of the time. My mom had very bad depression and anxiety and anger management issues. It's always been like she's two different people. But she was always my mommy. Until my parents divorced. They had been separated for a year and she took me up to Colorado and got together with an old ex boyfriend five years ago. Coincidentally that was when my hearing started going. That was the beginning of the end of our relationship.(the ex not hearing loss.) He was abusive to me and her. She ended it and took my baby half brother(ex's kid) back to Dallas. I had moved out and went home to my dad's house and had been living there for about3 months when she came back. And at first she was normal. But she got mad one time and decided that basically every aspect of her personality was displeasing to god and ever since then it's like she's died. Doesn't matter how I need her, all I get is a cold manipulative bitch. Neither of my parents have ever taken my hearing loss seriously mainly I guess it's because it's been gradual. It's still just mild after 5 years. But she seems to think that god is punishing me for my rebellion "if you are losing your hearing, which I don't think you are." My dad thinks my hearing loss is because I hate my mother. But that's not true. I love my mommy. So much it hurts. That cold hearted bitch killed her and I'll never forget that. And I can't forgive that. And I'm lying awake so hurt and angry at everything. I'm amazed at how much it feels like she's dead. I've had very close relatives die and it feels even worse than that. So thought I'd share that with y'all.
I miss my mommy.
Let me explain. My mom and I were outwardly very close when I way little. She was my favorite person. She stayed with me till I was old enough for kindergarten. And it was amazing... Most of the time. My mom had very bad depression and anxiety and anger management issues. It's always been like she's two different people. But she was always my mommy. Until my parents divorced. They had been separated for a year and she took me up to Colorado and got together with an old ex boyfriend five years ago. Coincidentally that was when my hearing started going. That was the beginning of the end of our relationship.(the ex not hearing loss.) He was abusive to me and her. She ended it and took my baby half brother(ex's kid) back to Dallas. I had moved out and went home to my dad's house and had been living there for about3 months when she came back. And at first she was normal. But she got mad one time and decided that basically every aspect of her personality was displeasing to god and ever since then it's like she's died. Doesn't matter how I need her, all I get is a cold manipulative bitch. Neither of my parents have ever taken my hearing loss seriously mainly I guess it's because it's been gradual. It's still just mild after 5 years. But she seems to think that god is punishing me for my rebellion "if you are losing your hearing, which I don't think you are." My dad thinks my hearing loss is because I hate my mother. But that's not true. I love my mommy. So much it hurts. That cold hearted bitch killed her and I'll never forget that. And I can't forgive that. And I'm lying awake so hurt and angry at everything. I'm amazed at how much it feels like she's dead. I've had very close relatives die and it feels even worse than that. So thought I'd share that with y'all.
