C-NICE, think of it as a grieving process. After all, you are mourning the "dying or death" of your hearing. We have all gone through it, in one way or another. It is hard when you have something you take for granted and *poof* in very little time at all it is gone. I started losing mine in 2006 in just one ear. I actually handled that fine, in retrospect, because most Meniere's patients don't lose all their hearing in both ears, or so I was told. Little did I know at the time, I didn't fall into that category.
I had my "good ear" and even though it had lost a bit, I had a hearing aid that worked great and it didn't seem to affect my life. January of 2008 is when it really hit home. I went to bed one night and woke up with what I thought was a simple head cold. True, I had the head cold, but the hearing didn't come back. That's when it hit. Having to get a stronger aid, and finding it didn't help as well as the first one had less than a year before. The denial, the anger, the depression, it all hit and was very hard to control. Like candybrowneyes says, people just don't get it and most don't know how to deal with it themselves. For some, you become a "non-person" while others show their true friendship/compassion. And yet, this all totally normal, and human, and I know it happens with everyone... not matter what they are losing (health, way of life, etc.) and the only thing you can do is allow your self the time needed to grieve and come to understand that you are still you, and life goes on, and you can still enjoy it to the fullest. The key is not to wallow in it. Yes, if you feel the need for a "pity party" go for it, you earned it. But that party, as with all parties, has an ending time and you need to get back to living normally. If you need a support group, or counseling, go for it as it can only help you deal. The same applies to your wife. She has to adjust to a new way of life as well, and she will get frustrated when you talk too loud, even though she knows you can't help it. She will have trouble remembering to look at you when she speaks, etc. But, she will, like my husband did, learn a different way of doing things. Just give yourselves both time...find things fun to do together, hobbies are great to get your mind off things, etc.
