how do u break up with ur sweetheart?

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SpiceHD

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everyone has their own way of breaking up with someone. im curious of how u did it and how different it was from when ur young and now.

again theres no obligation here... if u want to keep it personal its cool.
 
in young day, they didn't tell me to break up, never call me, never see me. I get hint they don't want me after I made good love with them.

present, they were serious with me and talk about break up. I whined.
 
I would tell her things aren't working out for us and try to break off from her gently. If she's taking it so hard, I wld just cut her off immediately to allow her to heal.

I was dumped by a date recently but we re still on speaking term as were just dating for 3 months. It depend on how you re have been dating a person. More long it is , it s difficult to break it off that simple.
 
There should be different levels of breakups.

(from a guy to a girl)

If she has a lot of problems...

Level 1: Talk about her problems.

This should give her a chance to talk about your problems.

If she still has problems and you've worked out your problems...

Level 2: Remind her of her problems.

This should remind her that you both talked about your and her problems in the past and that nothing has changed yet.

If she still hasn't changed...

Level 3: Tell her that you haven't seen any changes and that both should break up.

Now, this should wake her up. She should realize that you're thinking about breaking up with her and that if she really wants to keep you, she will do something.

She still has problems.

Level 4: Tell her it's over.

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This may sound like a passive approach, but there are many different methods depending on your reasons. This is sorta of what I did and nothing worked... so it was over for me. :)
 
SpiceHD said:
everyone has their own way of breaking up with someone. im curious of how u did it and how different it was from when ur young and now.

again theres no obligation here... if u want to keep it personal its cool.
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When I was a teen in high school, I was with someone for 6 years, after that horrible break up by his cheating, I decided seek revenge, played with guys heart, I would dated them, and dumped them without giving them any of my reasons, then the guy who loved me more than life itself died in the result of heart failure, His mother called my place of home informed me about Gary, and told me there was a five pages letter for me, She gave it to me at the funeral, It was the most sadness letter I ever read in my entire life. I blamed myself for hurting him wrongfully.

From that day forward, I overcome my fear and anxiety and allow myself to fall in love again, I learned that not every guy is like my ex who cheated for the entire 6 years of our relationship together. Love is the most beautiful thing, I was afraid to love again, But I let go of that fear, If I wasn't interested in someone, and the relationship was not going anywhere, I would be honest. I have been honest with ex two years ago, I didn't click with him, because he wasn't showing any sign of romance, he was too quiet, the relationship wasn't going anywhere, so, I decide to tell him face to face how I feel, of course he had tears from here and there, but I had to be honest with myself and to him. ;)

If I wasn't interested in any of the ones I've been dating or had a relationship with, I would be honest and upfront about my feelings, my emotions and my state of mind and I have. ;)
 
WildHunt said:
I just tell them, "Ok know what? it's over"

That was it.
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I use that as a last resort. I'm a kind of guy who is very patient. If it doesn't work out, I still hold on. If things get worse, then it's obvious that it won't get better... so it's over for me. :)
 
WildHunt said:
I just tell them, "Ok know what? it's over"

That was it.
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I like your advice! Really simple and easy, but I have only dated three guys so far. I'm so picky and I usually like intelligent guys. The first two guys I went out with only last for about a week and then I would call it off. The last guy was the longest and the hardest to break up. I didn't realized how much I have hurted his feeling. I went out with a hearing guy for five years and then I decided to call it off before I go to England. :S
 
PowerON said:
in young day, they didn't tell me to break up, never call me, never see me. I get hint they don't want me after I made good love with them.

present, they were serious with me and talk about break up. I whined.
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I was in a similar situation...really drives me insane when someone wouldnt call back, email me back, text me back, etc...and i still wonder whats going on 'til one day a friend told me her love has fade and I cried like hell and begged her to talk to me into this but she never did...so then afew weeks later she finally spoke to me after she recently got a boyfriend so...I was pretty crushed to hell yeah so break ups are never easy. *sigh*

You just have to be pretty honest for yourself, and if you feel something different, you should go up and be honest with that person like an adult, talk it out, and make sure the person understands that and its up to you if you want to give it another chance or not so...relationships are never easy, yet we know love is still very important to all of us so...

you know the old saying.

love yourself before loving others.

nobody is perfect, and there are no faults unless there is cheating and lying and abusing, which would make the relationship even more difficult.
 
Steel X said:
I was in a similar situation...really drives me insane when someone wouldnt call back, email me back, text me back, etc...and i still wonder whats going on 'til one day a friend told me her love has fade and I cried like hell and begged her to talk to me into this but she never did...so then afew weeks later she finally spoke to me after she recently got a boyfriend so...I was pretty crushed to hell yeah so break ups are never easy. *sigh*

You just have to be pretty honest for yourself, and if you feel something different, you should go up and be honest with that person like an adult, talk it out, and make sure the person understands that and its up to you if you want to give it another chance or not so...relationships are never easy, yet we know love is still very important to all of us so...

you know the old saying.

love yourself before loving others.

nobody is perfect, and there are no faults unless there is cheating and lying and abusing, which would make the relationship even more difficult.
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Good post. I remember you was the one who tld us that ur gf dumped you bec of ur addicion with porn ? Is that you?

Yea, deal with stalker ain't funny business. Just go watch "Fatal Attraction"
 
I have been lucky with boyfriends..they always told me the honest truth about why they think they need to break up with me. I did the same for dates or boyfriends I had. Important that we were honest about our feelings and didnt beat around the bush. I hated hurting them like that but I felt nothing for them so I would rather break it off then just cheat both of us by letting the relationship last any longer. I just basically told them that the chemistry wasnt there and I didnt want to lie to them anymore. The guys who broke it off with me said the same so it was all good. :)

My ex hubby's breakup with me was the worst..out of the blue, he told me he wanted a divorce. No warning..nothing. I thought everything was fine and 2 months later I learned that he had an affair and was in love with the other woman. He said it was because I was too preoccupated with Gallaudet and discovering the deaf world to pay attention to him. Looking back, I probably did but obviously he didnt understand I was going through something important in my life and needed his support..instead, he used that to cheat on me. Oh well...
 
KINGOFNOOBS said:
Good post. I remember you was the one who tld us that ur gf dumped you bec of ur addicion with porn ? Is that you?

Yea, deal with stalker ain't funny business. Just go watch "Fatal Attraction"
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sigh...yeah and when I learned the reason of her dumping me like that, I've quickly quit porn cold turkey and asked her to try this again since I was really serious about the quitting porn stuff but...I dunno...I guess she was confused and said it should be a tough lesson well earned or something so I did already learn my lesson, yeah so if she knows that I already learned my lesson, I would very much appericate to try working it out again but *shrugs* I dunno.
 
shel90 said:
I have been lucky with boyfriends..they always told me the honest truth about why they think they need to break up with me. I did the same for dates or boyfriends I had. Important that we were honest about our feelings and didnt beat around the bush. I hated hurting them like that but I felt nothing for them so I would rather break it off then just cheat both of us by letting the relationship last any longer. I just basically told them that the chemistry wasnt there and I didnt want to lie to them anymore. The guys who broke it off with me said the same so it was all good. :)

My ex hubby's breakup with me was the worst..out of the blue, he told me he wanted a divorce. No warning..nothing. I thought everything was fine and 2 months later I learned that he had an affair and was in love with the other woman. He said it was because I was too preoccupated with Gallaudet and discovering the deaf world to pay attention to him. Looking back, I probably did but obviously he didnt understand I was going through something important in my life and needed his support..instead, he used that to cheat on me. Oh well...
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Ouch that gotta hurt :( But good thing is that you got it over and have a wonderful family now. At some point of our life, we have to be tortured in order to have better life nothing more.
 
SpiceHD said:
everyone has their own way of breaking up with someone. im curious of how u did it and how different it was from when ur young and now.

again theres no obligation here... if u want to keep it personal its cool.
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If someone want to break up with me, I WON'T CRY for her NOR crawl over her P(!)$$I PERIOD.. I WILL NEVER BE REGRETS.. I know my griefs and pains will be heal/ recovery in few days, not long nor take forever. I will be forget the past and move on with my life for today and everyday.

WHY? someone won't accpet who the person is / how the person looks/ what the person is, therefore there is relationship never will work it out period. WORTHLESS!!!
 
VamPyroX said:
I use that as a last resort. I'm a kind of guy who is very patient. If it doesn't work out, I still hold on. If things get worse, then it's obvious that it won't get better... so it's over for me. :)
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well I had to use that phrase nearly all of my past relationships... I've only been dumped once. heh.
 
I've been dumped twice so it would be more difficult for me to trust girls who say they wouldnt break my heart and yet they did... so gotta protect your heart more carefully.
 
Steel X said:
I've been dumped twice so it would be more difficult for me to trust girls who say they wouldnt break my heart and yet they did... so gotta protect your heart more carefully.
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Why do our girlfriends always hurt us? :(
 
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