His wife is nice for a reason...

illustrator

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Marty wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Marty looks around the room and sees that it is in a perfect order, spotless, clean. So's the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love you."

So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating.

Marty asks, "Son, what happened last night?"

His son says, "Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door."

Confused, Marty asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"

His son replies, "Oh that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you said, "Lady, leave me alone, I'm married'!"
 
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:lol: he just saved his own marriage saying that and not saying something else stupid LOL i know the feeling i seen myself a falling down drunk and not remembering who my gf was or my friends too, i was that badly drunk next thing i know i was getting an ass kicking!
 
Originally posted by SilenceGold
:trains himself to say that sentence while under influence of alochol:

:rofl: *cackling here & gets my conscious back* :slap: "Hey.. that's not funny!!"... Oh what the hell.. that was funny!!! :lol: I'm just picking on SilenceGold for being a male chauvinistic pig!!
 
Ha ha...I am always defeated by women...just because I let that to happen...don't want my wife to think I'm competing. :p
 
MMMMMMMMM I must remember to say this next time I'm drunk!!! Then I will never get in trouble with the wife again! :cool:
 
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