Hearing Impaired @ Hearing = Fail 7 out of 10 times.

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RetailHell

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Well, this is unfortunate. I've tried dating hearing women but I find I have the worst luck. I have a CI, I lip read, I'm literate and I consider myself average looking. Skinny. I am socially inept unfortunately atop that I have trouble understanding certian types of people -- overbite, facial hair, thin lips, thick accents, quiet, slurs words.

Communication is a big part of a relationship so I can understand why it's a deal breaker for a lot of the women I meet up. They have slightly high standards but I wouldn't have it any other way. It just doesn't seem in the cards for me. I tried joining a Deaf based dating site and there's nobody within 100 miles of me under any search certia. Get this, I've never dated someone hearing impaired. I never felt like I really belonged in the Deaf culture despite being hearing impaired myself, yet I don't exactly fit into the hearing culture either so it's a weird limbo... But at this point I feel it may be time to give the deaf culture a try. The very least. Asides the discussion... is there anyone 22-29 living around North Idaho/East Washington/West Montana region that would like to hang out? I feel sheepish asking...
 
Asides the discussion... is there anyone 22-29 living around North Idaho/East Washington/West Montana region that would like to hang out? I feel sheepish asking...
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Sorry to inform you but I don't believe there are 22-29 living people in the area you mentioned.

However, welcome to Alldeaf, where we are all deaf, aside from the hearing who wandered in by mistake. :)
 
uh, from what I see, your lack of confidence is what turns them off. females don't want a guy who is not firmly sure of himself. they would rather be with an arsehead who is sure of himself, even though he is not healthy for them, than to be with a sheepish guy. the ones they go after is the guy who takes charge when he wants to. complaining about miscues, pitfalls, blaming on facts instead of being proactive is another biggest turnoff to the girls. it shouldn't be a surprise if you're not having much luck with them. recording past failures will only lead to more failures in the future. that's the way the world works. if you truly want to change this, then change your attitude about yourself into a positive one and try not to worry too much about the past since you can't change it.

and remember, having a girl will NOT solve your problems or make everything seem perfect. They are human beings y'know. Only YOU can solve the problems yourself. Once you gain confidence in yourself, people will follow. I can guarantee you that.


I wish you the best in your journey. Stay strong and be proud!
 
I recently met a deaf man I am interested in. He doesn't speak. He uses sign language. I don't consider myself a "groupie" of the deaf community. Now in response, this is advice I would give to any "average looking," "socially inept" guy. Stop looking at every girl as a possible date. Get to know people before you develop an "interest" in them. I think you will be surprised. I am open-minded romantically, but I don't think I am more so than any other person. I am willing to learn to sign, even if this man and I become casual friends. Try joining a non-deaf dating site. Personally, I would be just as flattered by interest from a deaf man as a hearing man. Maybe that isn't a feasible option, I don't know that much about the deaf community. Just a thought.
 
jupitersnymph said:
I recently met a deaf man I am interested in. He doesn't speak. He uses sign language. I don't consider myself a "groupie" of the deaf community. Now in response, this is advice I would give to any "average looking," "socially inept" guy. Stop looking at every girl as a possible date. Get to know people before you develop an "interest" in them. I think you will be surprised. I am open-minded romantically, but I don't think I am more so than any other person. I am willing to learn to sign, even if this man and I become casual friends. Try joining a non-deaf dating site. Personally, I would be just as flattered by interest from a deaf man as a hearing man. Maybe that isn't a feasible option, I don't know that much about the deaf community. Just a thought.
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Why are you here, and why did you pick your user name?

Plus it is customary to introduce yourself.
 
I haven't had luck finding a date. The women that have been interested in me, we met on instant messenger but they live in another state. Ive never met a woman from another state and those women eventually find a guy locally and lose interest in me.

Dating sites are a waste of time unless you are a woman looking for men. I put up a nice profile but no woman ever responds to it. I email others and only 10-20% respond back. Ive talked to a few of them and they say they get 10-20 responses a day from other men.

Ive never had a woman reject me due to my poor hearing, but I believe this is a big reason. They will just want to be friends but date hearing men. I never ask for phone numbers as I can't hear phones. I do sometimes ask for emails but they usually never email me back/respond.
 
Stop looking at every girl as a possible date. Get to know people before you develop an "interest" in them.
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Yes. Get to know them as FRIENDS first, and then it will develop into something more.
Seriously.......it takes time for realtionships to develop.
I remember a dude who thought he was in love with me after only knowing me two weeks!
Wheras with my current love, it took me a few years for the friendship to blossom into love.
But yeah I know what you mean...........it seems like a lot of people are very superfical when dealing with someone who's dhh.
 
Bottesini said:
Why are you here, and why did you pick your user name?

Plus it is customary to introduce yourself.
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My apologies ;) I am here because I met someone that I don't want to deeply offend. I hate to feel awkward in social situations and I have a feeling I am going to be seeing more of this guy. I like sailor jupiter and I've had this online name for a while.
 
jupitersnymph said:
My apologies ;) I am here because I met someone that I don't want to deeply offend. I hate to feel awkward in social situations and I have a feeling I am going to be seeing more of this guy. I like sailor jupiter and I've had this online name for a while.
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No need to apologize. I just ask questions to satisfy my curiousity.

Jupiter from Sailor Moon is a girl. A nymph is a female fairy. Why "jupitersnymph?"
 
Bottesini said:
No need to apologize. I just ask questions to satisfy my curiousity.

Jupiter from Sailor Moon is a girl. A nymph is a female fairy. Why "jupitersnymph?"
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Because, in my dreams, I hail from Jupiter... where I can be a cute sprite? I refered to the planet in my name, not the character. In the show, Sailor Jupiter is the princess of the planet. In a past life. It's a lot to process. Suffice it to say I'm an anime dork.
 
jupitersnymph said:
Because, in my dreams, I hail from Jupiter... where I can be a cute sprite? I refered to the planet in my name, not the character. In the show, Sailor Jupiter is the princess of the planet. In a past life. It's a lot to process. Suffice it to say I'm an anime dork.
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:) That much I did understand!
 
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