New guy's opinion
I am new to this site but not new to being around deafies. My stepdaughter is deaf, as well as having some other health problems. I also worked for several years in the medical field. I know none of this makes me an expert, any more than you are experts in heart problems unless you have them yourself.
I have found that whether it's hearing world or the deaf world, we humans will always misunderstand those who are different than we are. We do this in religion, race and understanding the handicapped or impaired, or what you care to be called. I have noticed that this misunderstanding leads to mistrust on either side. deafies tend to not want to trust the opinions of hearies and vice versa. I know that some will say, "Oh, don't listen to them, they don't know what its like to be deaf. You listen to us. We will tell you truth". This and many statements like it are why we don't trust each other. Another is something that was partly mentioned earlier.
You say we think deafies are stupid or slow because of your speech paterns. This is partly true because of the similarity to mentally handicapped persons. You say we don't trust because we can't understand signing. Well, you can't understand us either. This is only normal. We, who speak English, don't understand or trust those who speak only in a foreign language. Many white Americans don't trust and have labeled Hispanics as lazy and non law abiding individuals. This is not the case any more than saying all deaf people are retarded, or all Black people are lawbreakers and Black men all want to rape white women.
I has been said that education starts in the home. If we, as parents, were to teach our children to accept others for who they are, instead of what they are, it wouldn't take long to bury resentment and and prejudice. I have only been living around my stepdaughter for less than three years but this young woman has taught me a lot. She is a very loving individual with needs and desires like anyone else. I am handicapped phyically and she goes out of her way to help me and her mother. I can't use any sign language and at my age, will not even begin to do so. Part of that decision is to help her in the hearing world, which is much larger than her world. She has learned to understand me through lip reading and I have learned to understand her vocalizations. I make her go in stores for me to make purchases because she needs to be able to function on her own when something happens to me or her mother and she has to do this for herself. I tell my family and friends that she is normal in every way except she cannot hear.
Both the hearing world and the deaf community need to learn to trust. We need to realize that deafies are not mentally challenged, handicapped or retarded, or whatever you choose to be called today. You must learn that most hearing persons will accept you for who you are and those who don't are missing a great opportunity.
If my long soapbox speech has offended anyone, I apologize. If it helps even one person, deaf or otherwise to understand, then It was worth pecking out this message one letter at a time. The first step is to reach out and agree to help each other
Thank you
