deafdrummer, I get the impression that you are looking for something that doesn't really exist. I'm not saying that your feelings are wrong or that feral children do not exist. I am saying that you have decided that this is the only thing that can make you happy and are on a search to bring you to a place that really only exists in your imagination. For you, it's the destination not the journey.
The best part about life is the journey. There are times in our lives that really suck, I've been there. Why not explore different way of getting there. And along the way pay attention to what you enjoy more and where you relax more.
Why not take a weekend to camp out in one of our great national parks, volunteer with the national park service (or even the state parks). Perhaps volunteer at a soup kitchen (look at area churches they tend to do this a lot). I volunteered with a K9 Search and Rescue group and did a lot of wilderness work.
I suspect you are a lot like me. I am an introvert. I love being social but not with a huge group of people. I tend to focus on one person at a time and do get over stimulated and need to "escape" for a time. I even do this at family gatherings (they tend to be all day events). So, take a personality test and learn a little more about yourself. Look at who the other celebrities that match your personality characteristics. You will see there are successful people in all categories.
