I'd be inclined to agree with you about "loving yourself before loving others" in order to reduce the conflict and the division. By solving it out on the outside may have been proven wrong but, in order to see the equality itself in a human race, how would it be possible to create a dynamic spark that can bring it together? If it wasn't there, then it isn't.
So, with that said, Why is it hard to see that equality can be here but yet, it isn't seen in many parts? Is it because even though one may love him/herself before others, it will still create a conflict not only because there are a lot of views that are presented one way or another.